In need of a virtual hug

[Shedrech]

Hi Jenny
what a worry you've been through - your poor mum
I think you're wise to push things along and get as much support in place as you can - those pesky hospital doctors insisting on all this bother, eh; you and your mum will just have to put up with it - I found with dad that although he would at times be uncooperative with his carers, actually he relaxed into accepting care, and the ones he especially took to could cajole him into most things - as long as he knew he would see me at some point he was willing to let them help
sounds to me as though you've made a sensible swap for breakfast - I guess any cereal she would like is better than a sachet of oats - I used to leave out cereal breakfast bars, dad liked those, and a banana, with an individual carton of juice

Lou, hope your mum is recovered - so many nasty germs are going round - and you with earache, too, hope it clears and doesn't affect your balance - can't have you swaying around looking tipsy

sorry all, really tired today
so will just send very best wishes, as always

 

[hvml]

Hi Jenny

I think that replacing the porridge with Weetabix is the best thing that you can do for the moment. Once you get the carers up and running, they could make your Mum's porridge for her as part of their morning visit. It must be upsetting for you to see her having difficulty coping like that, but she is still thinking about the appropriate meal at the appropriate time of day, so she still has understanding of what she should be doing. Just needs a little help achieving it.

Re the job search, I have been invited to an assessment day for HCA at King's - my local hospital. It would be my number one choice, so I am crossing my fingers and doing a bit of numeracy practice - it involves a literacy and numeracy test.

 

[hvml]

Xx

 

[nae sporran]

Hi Jenny

I think that replacing the porridge with Weetabix is the best thing that you can do for the moment. Once you get the carers up and running, they could make your Mum's porridge for her as part of their morning visit. It must be upsetting for you to see her having difficulty coping like that, but she is still thinking about the appropriate meal at the appropriate time of day, so she still has understanding of what she should be doing. Just needs a little help achieving it.

Re the job search, I have been invited to an assessment day for HCA at King's - my local hospital. It would be my number one choice, so I am crossing my fingers and doing a bit of numeracy practice - it involves a literacy and numeracy test.

Good luck with the assessments Heidi.

 

[nae sporran]

Hello Heidi!

Hope you are well. How is the job search?
Mum is exhausted today. Doesn't want to eat (have made her sandwiches and left them by the bed) Sleeping a lot. I have applied for meals on wheels and have approached a reccommended care agency who will come out and assess her next Friday.
Mum will hate this but she is missing her important medication. This morning I arrived as she was taking her breakfast back to bed. What have you got, I asked. Porridge was the reply. It was a sachet of microwave porridge. Only problem was mum had poured the oats into a bowl and added cold milk. I cope with most things but mum's breakfast really upset me (I have removed the porridge and replaced it with Weetabix)
Anybody got any advice?

Jenny

Morning Jenny. What Shedrech said about carers being good at cajoling and persuading her dad to co-operate and accept care is what I have found with OH and her initial reluctance to accept help with a shower. Once your mum gets used to people, if you could be there the first couple of times it may help, she should settle down. Best of luck it. Are you able to be at the assessment on Friday? Sorry if that means extra pressure.

 

[Louby65]

That's fantastic news Heidi . I'm sure you will do well . Kings is a great hospital , full of opportunities and I'm sure would welcome such an empathetic , caring person such as yourself . Nursing could be doing with more people with your nature and experience . I wish you the best of luck . Let us know how you get on . Lou xx

 

[Shedrech]

morning all
wonder what today will bring?
Heidi, really good news - if they don't snap you up, they'll be missing an absolute gem! Tell us what day it is and we can bombard you with positive vibes

 

[jknight]

Hi Jenny

I think that replacing the porridge with Weetabix is the best thing that you can do for the moment. Once you get the carers up and running, they could make your Mum's porridge for her as part of their morning visit. It must be upsetting for you to see her having difficulty coping like that, but she is still thinking about the appropriate meal at the appropriate time of day, so she still has understanding of what she should be doing. Just needs a little help achieving it.

Re the job search, I have been invited to an assessment day for HCA at King's - my local hospital. It would be my number one choice, so I am crossing my fingers and doing a bit of numeracy practice - it involves a literacy and numeracy test.

Wonderful news, Heidi!!! So pleased for you xx

 

[jknight]

Morning Jenny. What Shedrech said about carers being good at cajoling and persuading her dad to co-operate and accept care is what I have found with OH and her initial reluctance to accept help with a shower. Once your mum gets used to people, if you could be there the first couple of times it may help, she should settle down. Best of luck it. Are you able to be at the assessment on Friday? Sorry if that means extra pressure.

That's good to hear, Rob. Yes, I will be at the assessment. I am reassured by the care agency's attitude (they were quick to assure me of their experience with reluctant clients) and the fact the Dementia Advisory Service couldn't speak more highly of them.
I intend to be there for the first couple of visits as well

 

[Louby65]

That sounds like a good idea Jenny . Best of luck . Lou xx

 

[jknight]

The Weetabix exchange went well! I didn't manage to get to mum's until just gone 9.30. Mum hadn't made herself a drink (unusual) so I got her a mug of tea and the Weetabix. So far so good! Spent the morning getting her shopping and sourcing a suitable key safe as she leaves her front door open (I shut it every time I left - my guess is that she got out of bed as soon as I left and opened it again)
I made her a small chicken salad with a Muller Rice for pud (she ate two yesterday)
Went home and did some of my own chores then went back at 5. She hadn't eaten a thing and had only drunk half the mug of tea. The water & cranberry juice I left hadn't been touched either. (She usually drinks endless cups - always has done)
I have made her a sandwich and left the rice and some grapes along with another mug of tea but have little confidence much will be eaten (or drunk)
With a UTI there couldn't be a worse time to stop drinking

 

[jknight]

That sounds like a good idea Jenny . Best of luck . Lou xx

How are you & your wee mum doing, Lou? Hope you are both feeling a bit better?

 

[Louby65]

We are getting better thanks Jenny . My mums chest infection is beginning to clear thankfully . Her carer took her to the coast yesterday and she had a fab time . Slept right through the night and was bright and cheery this morning . We went out for some retail therapy and a spot of lunch . She was tired when we came home so went to bed at 6.30. My ear infection is slowly improving I think . At least my face looks a bit more normal - the side of my face was swollen . Still got quite a bit of pain but I'm keeping busy to keep my mind of it . As long as my mum is ok . That's a pity your mum hasn't eaten or drank much but as you know having a uti can affect appetite . I know it happens to my mum . You have done your best , leaving out food and drink . Hopefully she will drink more soon . Is she on antibiotics for her uti? Xx

 

[jknight]

We are getting better thanks Jenny . My mums chest infection is beginning to clear thankfully . Her carer took her to the coast yesterday and she had a fab time . Slept right through the night and was bright and cheery this morning . We went out for some retail therapy and a spot of lunch . She was tired when we came home so went to bed at 6.30. My ear infection is slowly improving I think . At least my face looks a bit more normal - the side of my face was swollen . Still got quite a bit of pain but I'm keeping busy to keep my mind of it . As long as my mum is ok . That's a pity your mum hasn't eaten or drank much but as you know having a uti can affect appetite . I know it happens to my mum . You have done your best , leaving out food and drink . Hopefully she will drink more soon . Is she on antibiotics for her uti? Xx

Glad to hear your mum is feeling better, Lou. Hopefully you will feel better soon xx

She is. Last tablet tomorrow morning. She seems worse today than when she was admitted to hospital!

 

[exhausted 2015]

Sorry for the silence

Good evening all, I've just had a quick read through all your posts and it seems that I have a lot to catch up on
Lou...I do hope your mums chest infection is clearing and your ear infection xx
Jenny...I was sorry to read about your mum collapsing and that she has a uti hope she is feeling better xx
Heidi, I wish you well with HCA position and hope that you will be successful, or should I say I have no doubt that you will succeed xx
Rob...how are you and oh doing,hope that things are OK xx
Jackie, how are you and your dad ,I've seen a post you have written but I can't remember ifyou were both OK xx
My dad is not doing so well he has gone down bank since moving to the care home,its not the home or the carers, he's just had enough and told one of the carers that he wanted to die, he's not eating much but is being closely monitored and I have been going through some menu suggestions with the staff to try and get him to eat....he has also started sitting slumped over and won't raise his head,although I did get him to sit property today by asking him to sit to attention!!! which took him back to his army days and he immediately raised his head and put his shoulders back
so here I am heartbroken and weeping yet again,I've not been on the forum, or done anymore knitting until tonight I've just been sitting worrying myself sick about him,so please forgive me if I have missed all that has been going on ,take care all xxxx

 

[Aisling]

Good evening all, I've just had a quick read through all your posts and it seems that I have a lot to catch up on
Lou...I do hope your mums chest infection is clearing and your ear infection xx
Jenny...I was sorry to read about your mum collapsing and that she has a uti hope she is feeling better xx
Heidi, I wish you well with HCA position and hope that you will be successful, or should I say I have no doubt that you will succeed xx
Rob...how are you and oh doing,hope that things are OK xx
Jackie, how are you and your dad ,I've seen a post you have written but I can't remember ifyou were both OK xx
My dad is not doing so well he has gone down bank since moving to the care home,its not the home or the carers, he's just had enough and told one of the carers that he wanted to die, he's not eating much but is being closely monitored and I have been going through some menu suggestions with the staff to try and get him to eat....he has also started sitting slumped over and won't raise his head,although I did get him to sit property today by asking him to sit to attention!!! which took him back to his army days and he immediately raised his head and put his shoulders back
so here I am heartbroken and weeping yet again,I've not been on the forum, or done anymore knitting until tonight I've just been sitting worrying myself sick about him,so please forgive me if I have missed all that has been going on ,take care all xxxx

Sending you loads of hugs. So difficult For you and your dad.

Aisling

 

[exhausted 2015]

Sending you loads of hugs. So difficult For you and your dad.

Aisling

Thank you aisling xxxx

 

[Louby65]

Gill, I am sending you a great big hug ! I so wish your lovely dad would improve but maybe he is just tired of it all . I think we forget they are getting older and more frail and can't bounce back like they did before . It doesn't matter how old we are , we still see our parents as invincible , but alas they are not . Try to get some sleep . I was just on a shopping site there buying a sleep spray that one of my staff recommended . Hope it works ! Take care of yourself please Gill. Let us know how your dad is doing . I will keep my fingers crossed he improves . Best wishes always . Lou xx

 

[exhausted 2015]

Gill, I am sending you a great big hug ! I so wish your lovely dad would improve but maybe he is just tired of it all . I think we forget they are getting older and more frail and can't bounce back like they did before . It doesn't matter how old we are , we still see our parents as invincible , but alas they are not . Try to get some sleep . I was just on a shopping site there buying a sleep spray that one of my staff recommended . Hope it works ! Take care of yourself please Gill. Let us know how your dad is doing . I will keep my fingers crossed he improves . Best wishes always . Lou xx

Thank you Lou xx are you having trouble sleeping ??? I did have a sleep spray once and it did work for a little while for me ..take care Lou xxx

 

[nae sporran]

Sorry to hear about your dad Gill. He is probably just tired after all the moving and hopefully a few days rest will get him going. I don't mean that to sound trite, just trying to be positive for you. Hope you had a good sleep after letting all he emotions and don't feel guilty about any of it.
All the best to you both as always, Rob.

Morning Lou, hope your sleep spray works for you. Using up a holiday to look after your mum is bound to be tiring. Is she getting any better? All the best.