Hello, I'm new to this site. I'm having a stress of a day. Maybe I should start from the begining. My Dad had been diagnosed with vascular dementia he is 69. It was only last week he was diagnosed. It has taken us one and a half years to get this far! We have not been offered any help and are waiting for a psychologist to do some more tests on a home visit. What started off as simple memory loss has now turned in to paranoia and aggression. My mum did very little talking when they went to the memory clinic as she is not the kind of woman to ask for any help. She had a list a mile long but was scared to mention anything about it as she did not want to upset my Dad. Today I found out that he tried to strangle her on Saturday. For the past 2 weeks he has been accusing her of having affairs with all kinds of men. This could be no further from the truth as my Mum wants a quiet life and she is happy doing a crossword or some knitting. He has been getting verbally agressive with her and then he became phyisical over the weekend. He attacked her on Saturday and she didn't mention anything to me or my sisters. Then he attacked her on Sunday evening again, throwing furniture around. This time she left and went to my sisters and she told her everything that has been going on over the past few weeks. She said it got to the point where she was writing letters for us all in case he killed her. We have always been a very close family and it breaks my heart knowing that this situation is not going to get any better. My Dads behaviour has gone back to how it was when they first married 47 years ago. He was very jealous and possesive and hated anyone looking at my Mum. We have offered to get more help for our mum but she said its ok beacuse today he said he was sorry again. But who do we ask for help? His GP or the consultant at the memory clinic (who my sister said was very nice but not really that helpful) Or the psychologist who is going to do the home visit whenever the appointment come through. I want to do more to help my Mum but she does not like to put on me as I have 4 year old twins to run around after. The worse part of my Dads dementia has been his speech, almost like he knows what he wants to say but can't find the right words and forgetfullness names, keys etc. He is still very active though and is always out and about and pottering in the garden. Its been such a stress of a day on and off the phone all day to my sisters and checking up on my Mum and Dad. He has not been put on any medication for the dementia but he is on tablets for heart problems, cholesterol, and diabetes. Is there any form of medication he can take for the aggression? What is the best thing we can do to help? Where do we start? Help!