Struggling

[Beaky144]

I don't want to ramble and am new to this forum but I am struggling with my mum's recent diagnosis of dementia and wondered if anyone had any words of wisdom or advice they could share.

My mum is 65 (I am 31) and she has been diagnosed with frontotemporal dementia. She declined rapidly from February this year to July and was sectioned under the Mental Health Act in hospital. I have now managed to get her moved to a care home but she is struggling to settle in and her psychosis is getting worse. I don't want her to spend the rest of her life in hospital nor do I want her to be this unhappy and have zero quality of life. But as I work full time (usually a 50 hour week) I cannot manage to care for her at home either.

Anti psychotic medication hasn't helped to date and her memory is declining on a daily basis.

Does anyone have any tips on helping parents settle into care homes and cope with their illness better? Or any sources I can go to for help?

Thanks

 

[jeany123]

Hello Beaky and welcome to Talking Point, I am sorry to hear about your mum it must be very hard for you, My husband has vascular dementia and is 67 he was diagnosed about 6 years ago,He is at home so can't really help you but I am sure people will be along soon who can,

I wonder if you have been in touch with Alzheimers Society,


If you have concerns about Alzheimer's disease or any other form of dementia, Alzheimer's Society National Dementia Helpline can provide information, support and guidance.

You can contact our helpline by calling 0300 222 1122 or by email at helpline@alzheimers.org.uk.

The helpline is usually open from 9am to 5pm Monday to Friday, and from 10am - 4pm at weekends. However, the service may be closed occasionally during these times for operational reasons.

I am sure they will be able to give you some advice,

Best wishes, Jeany x

 

[cathykins]

Hi Beaky

Welcome to the group. I have found it very helpful, hope you will too.

Your Mum as younger than mine (86) so it must be hard to accept the diagnosis, but accept it you must.

Many people struggle with the decision to put loved ones in a care home, but it is the best option as 24 hour care is available, and the staff are trained to recognise and deal with the symptoms of dementia/alzheimers.

From reading other posts, and from my own experience, it can take a while, sometimes months before residents are 'settled' in care homes. My Mum has been in one for a few months now and still asks why she is there, and asks why she can't come home. It is heartbreaking, but there just is no other option. All we can do is make her room as homely as possible, and try to reassure her when we visit, but it is hard.

I wish you luck, and would encourage you to visit this site whenever you have a concern, as there is a wealth of experience and understanding here.

Hugs to you,
Cathykins

 

[henfenywfach]

I don't want to ramble and am new to this forum but I am struggling with my mum's recent diagnosis of dementia and wondered if anyone had any words of wisdom or advice they could share.

My mum is 65 (I am 31) and she has been diagnosed with frontotemporal dementia. She declined rapidly from February this year to July and was sectioned under the Mental Health Act in hospital. I have now managed to get her moved to a care home but she is struggling to settle in and her psychosis is getting worse. I don't want her to spend the rest of her life in hospital nor do I want her to be this unhappy and have zero quality of life. But as I work full time (usually a 50 hour week) I cannot manage to care for her at home either.

Anti psychotic medication hasn't helped to date and her memory is declining on a daily basis.

Does anyone have any tips on helping parents settle into care homes and cope with their illness better? Or any sources I can go to for help?

Thanks

Hi!..firstly dont apologise only ramblers are allowed!...I was in my thirties when I began being a carer daughter rather than a daughter....
My dad is my mums carer but dad has dlb..dementia with lewybodys...
We are not at the point of looking for ch but my advice is to look after yourself as you will need to be strong..speak to the carers project if you need support..and the alzheimers society...your mum is younger than my dad he was coming up to 70s when my fears for him started..and no one tells you how hard it is at our young age having to parent our parents...read inspection reports of chs..warts and all...and look after you too!

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