Hi I’m very new to this site I posted first last Sunday . I’m totally exhausted have autoimmune disease and supporting my daughter and three children , not financially but physically when ican and emotionally . My mum has four care visits a day , she is still able to walk more of a shuffle , it’s too late for her to learn to use a walker she wears pads sometimes soils on the floor as she takes off her pad at night sometimes wets the bed . She has everything done for her now and does very little all day except sit in her chair She reads the newspaper but it’s the same thing over and over .
She repeats but occasionally she will have a fairly normal conversation
. She is allowing the carers to dress and change her usually but not always, she has needed cream on her bottom as she won’t always let them change her and she sits all day . She has the correct support in her chair and can still rise to get up . She is now sometimes getting cross with the carers saying they are bossy . We have one private carer who shops and cleans and is just wonderful , she can only do one long morning a week . She cries when I visit saying she is lonely but forgets quickly.
She is still being taken to a lunch club once a week if the weather is ok but getting her down her long path with steps and into the car won’t be happening much longer , A wheelchair has been discussed with social services but is not an option .
She has stubbornly refused and rejected placements at day care ,and I tried taking her to a care home with daycare , she went with me once I stayed with her the second time she was taken and left , she doesn’t want to go again . I think it’s social anxiety .
. Myself and two sisters have done all we can to keep her at home , she panicked when I took her to daycare at the home said “is this a care home “ she was ok on reassurance and enjoyed her visit because I was with her . When I asked her later if she wanted to go again she had a wicked twinkle and said I don’t think so , she understand I was trying to ease her slowly into care .
I can’t physically or mentally support her anymore . My dermatologist And GP said I have to stop , I’m loosing my hair .am so stressed out , I’ve had ME in the past and worried I could get that again as I’m recovering very slowly from a bad virus
It’s not just her care which the carers can provide there is constant up keep of the bungalow which Is deteriorating , there is now only one door as the other is rotten , we’ve just had new smoke detectors fitted and she has a fall alarm The bungalow needs professional cleaners to make it hygieneic but would upset her too much. She is alone from about 8 when she goes to bed until about 9 with the first care visit . My younger sister and I have LPOA health and welfare , the three of us have financial LPOA . My elder sister does her finances she lives 6 hrs away can no longer visit . My younger sister 4 hours away is working . She tries to do a short weekend visit every 6 ,8 weeks . I live a 40 min drive away .
Sorry this is so long , we just don’t know what to do . She will be so distressed if we have to put her into care and her money will go fast if we get in full time care She is tiny but very strong , I think she’s in stage 6 but probably has vascular dementia as well . Please I need some advice tzavet
She repeats but occasionally she will have a fairly normal conversation
. She is allowing the carers to dress and change her usually but not always, she has needed cream on her bottom as she won’t always let them change her and she sits all day . She has the correct support in her chair and can still rise to get up . She is now sometimes getting cross with the carers saying they are bossy . We have one private carer who shops and cleans and is just wonderful , she can only do one long morning a week . She cries when I visit saying she is lonely but forgets quickly.
She is still being taken to a lunch club once a week if the weather is ok but getting her down her long path with steps and into the car won’t be happening much longer , A wheelchair has been discussed with social services but is not an option .
She has stubbornly refused and rejected placements at day care ,and I tried taking her to a care home with daycare , she went with me once I stayed with her the second time she was taken and left , she doesn’t want to go again . I think it’s social anxiety .
. Myself and two sisters have done all we can to keep her at home , she panicked when I took her to daycare at the home said “is this a care home “ she was ok on reassurance and enjoyed her visit because I was with her . When I asked her later if she wanted to go again she had a wicked twinkle and said I don’t think so , she understand I was trying to ease her slowly into care .
I can’t physically or mentally support her anymore . My dermatologist And GP said I have to stop , I’m loosing my hair .am so stressed out , I’ve had ME in the past and worried I could get that again as I’m recovering very slowly from a bad virus
It’s not just her care which the carers can provide there is constant up keep of the bungalow which Is deteriorating , there is now only one door as the other is rotten , we’ve just had new smoke detectors fitted and she has a fall alarm The bungalow needs professional cleaners to make it hygieneic but would upset her too much. She is alone from about 8 when she goes to bed until about 9 with the first care visit . My younger sister and I have LPOA health and welfare , the three of us have financial LPOA . My elder sister does her finances she lives 6 hrs away can no longer visit . My younger sister 4 hours away is working . She tries to do a short weekend visit every 6 ,8 weeks . I live a 40 min drive away .
Sorry this is so long , we just don’t know what to do . She will be so distressed if we have to put her into care and her money will go fast if we get in full time care She is tiny but very strong , I think she’s in stage 6 but probably has vascular dementia as well . Please I need some advice tzavet