I’d really appreciate any advice anyone may have regarding my mum.
She was admitted to hospital 4 weeks ago today after a fall at home. That night, on the ward, she fell again and one of these falls resulted in a fractured pelvis....hence her four week stay in hospital.
She has made a reasonable physical recovery but her Dementia has taken a bit of a nose dive. We were struggling at home prior to this but SS had only just put in place a basic package of care in November in spite of an urgent referral by the GP and CPN in April. The fall and subsequent admission to hospital were the crisis we knew would happen and the only way in which we have been able to get SS to see she is completely unsafe to live alone now.
I had a brief meeting with the hospital discharge social worker and one nurse prior to Christmas when I was asked if she had her own home (no), if she had savings (not enough to meet their self funding criteria) and was then told that if she was SS funded, she would be given a ‘contract’ bed as our local authority no longer have care homes and purchase contract beds in homes throughout the county. I explained that she has a very close relationship with me and her immediate family and placing her a long way away would be cruel and detrimental to her wellbeing. Since that meeting, I’ve heard nothing although I was told in no uncertain terms not to interfere, not to contact SS and to wait.
On Thursday I called the ward to ask what was happening as I’d heard nothing. I was told that assessments were still taking place and it would take a while. On Friday when my daughter visited, the hospital social worker came into my mother’s room and told my daughter that as of today (Monday) there was no longer a bed for her in hospital and there would be a meeting to decide where she would go. My daughter called me (4.30pm) and I immediately called our local SS manager who confirmed a meeting would take place today (Monday) to assess her needs and decide what should happen next. I said I was concerned as I had no idea where she might be placed and felt I should have some sort of choice of care home at least. She eventually told me the name of a local care home where they have contract beds so on Saturday I went to look around. The CQC report is good.
All I can say is I came away feeling thoroughly miserable. It really was the sort of care home I remember my gran in 30 years ago....all the residents seemed to have dementia and were either sleeping or displaying distress. My poor mum will just decline in this kind of environment and it truly broke my heart to think this could be where she will end up.
I feel out of my depth with SS and whether we do have any choice at all. I am worried she will just be placed somewhere that isn’t suitable for her and will only exacerbate her dementia and aid her decline.
It’s 2 am and I can’t sleep...my heart is racing and I’m covered in hives. I am at work at 8am and can’t see how I can get through the day let alone this week with working and trying to stay ahead of the game with mum. I consider myself a fairly capable person but I truly feel overwhelmed with all of this and terrified that SS will bamboozle me enough that I’ll end up going along with whatever they say without any real choice for mum’s wellbeing.
Any advice at all to help us get through this and get mum somewhere where she will be safe, cared for and happy would be so welcome.......
She was admitted to hospital 4 weeks ago today after a fall at home. That night, on the ward, she fell again and one of these falls resulted in a fractured pelvis....hence her four week stay in hospital.
She has made a reasonable physical recovery but her Dementia has taken a bit of a nose dive. We were struggling at home prior to this but SS had only just put in place a basic package of care in November in spite of an urgent referral by the GP and CPN in April. The fall and subsequent admission to hospital were the crisis we knew would happen and the only way in which we have been able to get SS to see she is completely unsafe to live alone now.
I had a brief meeting with the hospital discharge social worker and one nurse prior to Christmas when I was asked if she had her own home (no), if she had savings (not enough to meet their self funding criteria) and was then told that if she was SS funded, she would be given a ‘contract’ bed as our local authority no longer have care homes and purchase contract beds in homes throughout the county. I explained that she has a very close relationship with me and her immediate family and placing her a long way away would be cruel and detrimental to her wellbeing. Since that meeting, I’ve heard nothing although I was told in no uncertain terms not to interfere, not to contact SS and to wait.
On Thursday I called the ward to ask what was happening as I’d heard nothing. I was told that assessments were still taking place and it would take a while. On Friday when my daughter visited, the hospital social worker came into my mother’s room and told my daughter that as of today (Monday) there was no longer a bed for her in hospital and there would be a meeting to decide where she would go. My daughter called me (4.30pm) and I immediately called our local SS manager who confirmed a meeting would take place today (Monday) to assess her needs and decide what should happen next. I said I was concerned as I had no idea where she might be placed and felt I should have some sort of choice of care home at least. She eventually told me the name of a local care home where they have contract beds so on Saturday I went to look around. The CQC report is good.
All I can say is I came away feeling thoroughly miserable. It really was the sort of care home I remember my gran in 30 years ago....all the residents seemed to have dementia and were either sleeping or displaying distress. My poor mum will just decline in this kind of environment and it truly broke my heart to think this could be where she will end up.
I feel out of my depth with SS and whether we do have any choice at all. I am worried she will just be placed somewhere that isn’t suitable for her and will only exacerbate her dementia and aid her decline.
It’s 2 am and I can’t sleep...my heart is racing and I’m covered in hives. I am at work at 8am and can’t see how I can get through the day let alone this week with working and trying to stay ahead of the game with mum. I consider myself a fairly capable person but I truly feel overwhelmed with all of this and terrified that SS will bamboozle me enough that I’ll end up going along with whatever they say without any real choice for mum’s wellbeing.
Any advice at all to help us get through this and get mum somewhere where she will be safe, cared for and happy would be so welcome.......