Just returned from my daily visit to care home.. Daily, because I'm worried they won't notice if he becomes ill again. This is my choice, but I feel I need to go as dad has been seriously ill twice in last 2 months with pneumonia and I had to tell staff he was ill. I've read all the research and know that the outlook for him isn't good, I accept that and want to spend as much times as I can with him. I rush down after work planning to be there with him for dinner- to assist him when he needs it and so he can eat in a quiet environment- his room. Today, I arrived at 4.30pm- all the residents were already eating- again. Visitors not allowed to interrupt mealtimes, so I wait the 40 mins it takes for my dad to struggle thru his dinner, with a staff member assisting/prompting him now and then. The mealtime seems to change daily- is this normal? The meals are not always puréed and they are meant to be. Today, the staff were eating their dinner at the same time as the residents!! My dad is funding his own care, with me making up the shortfall. My dilemma is that he seems content in this home.. I have concerns, dad is frail and no longer able to tell me if anything else is not as it should be. Is it me??? If dad seems content, should that be all that matters? I'm stressed and exhausted. I have other concerns re the home, but if I move dad- well, is that right if he seems content and may be nearing the end of his life.? Hope this makes sense. I feel like I'm losing my mind. :-/