So all along my dementia journey and posting on here, I've concentrated on the here and now and dealing with things and mum's dementia, not stepping back to remember mum.
Many of the people who first supported me on TP have long since moved away as their PWD passed and they no longer needed the support on here and I am grateful for all the support from past and present members.
Putting together a facebook post and thinking for the funeral, mum lived a varied life which I'm going to put some details in below as just want to record it here.
Born out of wedlock in 1930, to a Russian jewish immigrant father who had left what is now Lithuania to escape the Russian pogroms around 1912. Her mother was from the West country and had grown up in a life of poverty that we couldn't contemplate today. My grandma entered service in London aged 14 in 1924 and a was a live in servant in the house, having at least 3 children with my grandfather. It wasn't a particularly wealthy house but servants weren't that expensive. My grandfather and his wife adopted my mum and her surviving sister although her mother also lived in the house. At this stage mum lived in a house where English, Russian and Yidddish were spoken, she could read both Russian cryllic and Hebrew writing all her life.
They lived around the Brick Lane area of London, which at the time was a jewish ghetto.
I'm not sure when my Grandma left this situation, but it was in the war years. Mum was evacuated at the start of the war, this period was known as the phoney war so grandma brought mum and her sister back to London, and then evacuated again when the blitz happened. She lived in poverty for much of this time.
Mum was at a 'Guild' school in London, Mary Datchelor's, for someone from her poor background a fantastic education. She went to Uni and did a maths degree, although she didn't graduate, partly I understand as too involved in running a Girl Guide unit and partly as she had to work to fund herself as her father refused to complete the financial forms. She then worked as a maths teacher at a boarding school, before working for Lloyds bank as a foreign exchange dealer in the city. She applied for a job in the bank of England and was turned down as she didn't pass security as her father was not British born (he had British nationality).
Mum was sporty, played a lot of tennis in her 20s resulting in cartilage ops (I'm guessing unusual in the 1950s), She was introduced to skiing in the early 60s by colleagues and was a member of a home counties water skiing club where she met my dad, she was on a Club Med holiday in Corfu in 1966 when he flew out to propose to her.
With her sister (a French bilingual secretary) she rode on a motorbike across Europe to Tripoli (different times!) where her sister worked as a secretary. My ex Sil heard a tale she climbed the matterhorn on one occasion.
She was a stay at home mum during my childhood, albeit we water skiied and skied from time to time (dad had bipolar so life was up and down). In my late teens she started lots of voluntary work, helping with Girl Guides again, lifesaving club trearsurer, reading in church, helping with the church toddler group, church cafe, and filing her life.
She adored her grandchildren, although sadly only the eldest really remembers her pre dementia, the youngest 3 being 8 6 and 4 when dementia really started changing her nearly 10 years ago.
There's much more she fitted in, avidly gardening, embroidery, clothes making.
She moved from abject poverty as a child to a comfortable life as an adult.
Many of the people who first supported me on TP have long since moved away as their PWD passed and they no longer needed the support on here and I am grateful for all the support from past and present members.
Putting together a facebook post and thinking for the funeral, mum lived a varied life which I'm going to put some details in below as just want to record it here.
Born out of wedlock in 1930, to a Russian jewish immigrant father who had left what is now Lithuania to escape the Russian pogroms around 1912. Her mother was from the West country and had grown up in a life of poverty that we couldn't contemplate today. My grandma entered service in London aged 14 in 1924 and a was a live in servant in the house, having at least 3 children with my grandfather. It wasn't a particularly wealthy house but servants weren't that expensive. My grandfather and his wife adopted my mum and her surviving sister although her mother also lived in the house. At this stage mum lived in a house where English, Russian and Yidddish were spoken, she could read both Russian cryllic and Hebrew writing all her life.
They lived around the Brick Lane area of London, which at the time was a jewish ghetto.
I'm not sure when my Grandma left this situation, but it was in the war years. Mum was evacuated at the start of the war, this period was known as the phoney war so grandma brought mum and her sister back to London, and then evacuated again when the blitz happened. She lived in poverty for much of this time.
Mum was at a 'Guild' school in London, Mary Datchelor's, for someone from her poor background a fantastic education. She went to Uni and did a maths degree, although she didn't graduate, partly I understand as too involved in running a Girl Guide unit and partly as she had to work to fund herself as her father refused to complete the financial forms. She then worked as a maths teacher at a boarding school, before working for Lloyds bank as a foreign exchange dealer in the city. She applied for a job in the bank of England and was turned down as she didn't pass security as her father was not British born (he had British nationality).
Mum was sporty, played a lot of tennis in her 20s resulting in cartilage ops (I'm guessing unusual in the 1950s), She was introduced to skiing in the early 60s by colleagues and was a member of a home counties water skiing club where she met my dad, she was on a Club Med holiday in Corfu in 1966 when he flew out to propose to her.
With her sister (a French bilingual secretary) she rode on a motorbike across Europe to Tripoli (different times!) where her sister worked as a secretary. My ex Sil heard a tale she climbed the matterhorn on one occasion.
She was a stay at home mum during my childhood, albeit we water skiied and skied from time to time (dad had bipolar so life was up and down). In my late teens she started lots of voluntary work, helping with Girl Guides again, lifesaving club trearsurer, reading in church, helping with the church toddler group, church cafe, and filing her life.
She adored her grandchildren, although sadly only the eldest really remembers her pre dementia, the youngest 3 being 8 6 and 4 when dementia really started changing her nearly 10 years ago.
There's much more she fitted in, avidly gardening, embroidery, clothes making.
She moved from abject poverty as a child to a comfortable life as an adult.