Just somewhere to say how I’m feeling.. I’m not sure if we are at the end or nearing it but I think it’s heading there.
Went and saw mum today and she’s been deteriorating back at the nursing home since her hospital admission in December and covid. It was the first time seeing her in the bed in the nursing home and she looked so small. There was a small smile when we got there but the nurses were about to feed her so I sat by the bed and watched as mum had one spoon of porridge and held it in her mouth for a minute before swallowing. The nurse then attempted again but mum just wouldn’t open her mouth. She then tried to get her to have some of her juice which mum took but again held in her mouth for a while before swallowing.
I said to the nurse perhaps if me and my husband waited outside the room mum might eat a bit more as she was getting distracted by us being there but she still wouldn’t take anymore porridge so off they went to mix it with way more water and get into a beaker for her to drink it basically. Which she had about half a beaker of it. They then surrendered as she wasn’t going to have anymore.
Me and my husband sat with her and we got a few little smiles but no words again. Will be nearly 10 weeks since she talked to me. The nurses say all they have gotten out of her is a couple of hums. She made a few noises as if trying to communicate but they were just grumbles.
I sat and stroked her hand and her head and she dozed off a couple times in the hour. I tried to get her to have more juice and she accepted twice. Took a small sip and held both in her mouth before swallowing after a while.
She seemed to get super tired. So we let her get to sleep.
Spoke to the nurse who advised the SALT team would be in to assess mum.
Was just such a heartbreaking visit seeing her deteriorating so much more. However there was a moment I will cherish forever when I couldn’t help but let a few tears escape and my mum lightly stroked my cheek before drifting into a snooze
I know she could be this way for some time but I just hope she is as comfortable as she can be. I’m so worried she might be coming to the end and I want to make sure I’d be there for it but as with everything in this disease you just never know what’s going to happen next.
Went and saw mum today and she’s been deteriorating back at the nursing home since her hospital admission in December and covid. It was the first time seeing her in the bed in the nursing home and she looked so small. There was a small smile when we got there but the nurses were about to feed her so I sat by the bed and watched as mum had one spoon of porridge and held it in her mouth for a minute before swallowing. The nurse then attempted again but mum just wouldn’t open her mouth. She then tried to get her to have some of her juice which mum took but again held in her mouth for a while before swallowing.
I said to the nurse perhaps if me and my husband waited outside the room mum might eat a bit more as she was getting distracted by us being there but she still wouldn’t take anymore porridge so off they went to mix it with way more water and get into a beaker for her to drink it basically. Which she had about half a beaker of it. They then surrendered as she wasn’t going to have anymore.
Me and my husband sat with her and we got a few little smiles but no words again. Will be nearly 10 weeks since she talked to me. The nurses say all they have gotten out of her is a couple of hums. She made a few noises as if trying to communicate but they were just grumbles.
I sat and stroked her hand and her head and she dozed off a couple times in the hour. I tried to get her to have more juice and she accepted twice. Took a small sip and held both in her mouth before swallowing after a while.
She seemed to get super tired. So we let her get to sleep.
Spoke to the nurse who advised the SALT team would be in to assess mum.
Was just such a heartbreaking visit seeing her deteriorating so much more. However there was a moment I will cherish forever when I couldn’t help but let a few tears escape and my mum lightly stroked my cheek before drifting into a snooze
I know she could be this way for some time but I just hope she is as comfortable as she can be. I’m so worried she might be coming to the end and I want to make sure I’d be there for it but as with everything in this disease you just never know what’s going to happen next.