a weekend of 2 halves.

[GeorgieW]

hello world!

its been a weekend of 2 halves!

We now know that mum is unable to use a phone of either the house phone or the mobile variety! I finally tracked her mobile phone down charged it up and left it next to her chair. I have been tossing up whether to cancel the contract or leave it going. I think the final test is to get her brother to call her on it and see what she does.

Thing is do I get rid of the phone and get her a pendant alarm thingi which I am not sure she will be able to understand/use

We also know that the Donepezil appears to be working - sort of.

How do we know this? Mum took a tumble up (yes you read that right) the garden steps 15 or so minutes before I got home from sorting the horses out. The dogs were going ballistic at the back gate and she wandered down to see what it was all about. turned round, lost her balance and then said that she tripped over a dog and landed with her chest over the edge of a step. Nothing broken from what I can tell, but she was quite jarred up about the experience and I can safely say a little battered and bruised. But the big thing was that she remembered what had happened in enough detail to tell me about it when I got in. The yin to this yang is that after a nights sleep she has no recollection of the fall, just that her chest hurts.

The fall now makes me feel extremely guilty (stupid I know) for actually getting on one of my horses and going out for a ride and enjoying myself (having said that it was a very short ride round a field and I was worrying more about the ground conditions than anything else tbh)- something I haven't done since the intervention last November

Since it was a nice day yesterday I took her to see the horses. I parked her in a chair and she held court with the other liveries and the stories that she told were very believable and she got to pet one of the big beasties and feed her (the horse) treats

Thing is I think that there has been another small slide. The amount of time that she is sleeping in bed has gone up since the fall and her choice of clothing over the last couple of days has been a touch interesting. I know its only been a couple of days, and its hard to tell if there is a pattern especially since the drugs mask a lot of things but..... I don't know.

I am not sure why I have written this..... maybe to know I am not going totally bonkers?
Does the "hive mind" have suggestions about the pendant alarm thingi?

 

[cymbid]

We just got a pendant alarm for mum. Firstly she switched the receiver off at the wall. Weve hidden it down the back of the sofa now. But she wont wear the pendant. She says she might press it accidently .
What to do ??? Bangs head off the wall (thats me by the way)

 

[GeorgieW]

What to do ??? Bangs head off the wall (thats me by the way)

Thank you this made me laugh.

 

[DaftDad]

We just got a pendant alarm for mum. Firstly she switched the receiver off at the wall. Weve hidden it down the back of the sofa now. But she wont wear the pendant. She says she might press it accidently .
What to do ??? Bangs head off the wall (thats me by the way)

This is our experience, basically. The pendant gets triggered because he throws it across the room. He threw the watch version of the alarm button in the bin. Twice. He broke the neck cord for the pendant one. Twice. We're ready to give up really.

 

[JoannePat]

Hi, I have seen on Amazon and local shops that you can get a really simple mobile phone, big buttons and a green and red button for accepting calls etc. It certainly makes it easier for them, actually my dad has just requested the exact thing! He wants to leave his smart phone at home and just carry the small one. Not ideal as we use Life 360 to keep track of him.

As far as the alarm bracelet goes, get one and see how she gets on with it. We are waiting for my dads to be installed/delivered (I don't know what they have to install, I just think its an excuse for the delay).

The other thing that some people have spoken about on here is the Alexa Video call. My dad has an Alexa Echo that reminds him to take tablets, drink more water, switch the fire off blah blah. But again that may not work for her.

There are so many different options now days,

Hope you get something sorted!

Jxx

 

[Chizz]

hello world!

its been a weekend of 2 halves!

We now know that mum is unable to use a phone of either the house phone or the mobile variety! I finally tracked her mobile phone down charged it up and left it next to her chair. I have been tossing up whether to cancel the contract or leave it going. I think the final test is to get her brother to call her on it and see what she does.

Thing is do I get rid of the phone and get her a pendant alarm thingi which I am not sure she will be able to understand/use

We also know that the Donepezil appears to be working - sort of.

How do we know this? Mum took a tumble up (yes you read that right) the garden steps 15 or so minutes before I got home from sorting the horses out. The dogs were going ballistic at the back gate and she wandered down to see what it was all about. turned round, lost her balance and then said that she tripped over a dog and landed with her chest over the edge of a step. Nothing broken from what I can tell, but she was quite jarred up about the experience and I can safely say a little battered and bruised. But the big thing was that she remembered what had happened in enough detail to tell me about it when I got in. The yin to this yang is that after a nights sleep she has no recollection of the fall, just that her chest hurts.

The fall now makes me feel extremely guilty (stupid I know) for actually getting on one of my horses and going out for a ride and enjoying myself (having said that it was a very short ride round a field and I was worrying more about the ground conditions than anything else tbh)- something I haven't done since the intervention last November

Since it was a nice day yesterday I took her to see the horses. I parked her in a chair and she held court with the other liveries and the stories that she told were very believable and she got to pet one of the big beasties and feed her (the horse) treats

Thing is I think that there has been another small slide. The amount of time that she is sleeping in bed has gone up since the fall and her choice of clothing over the last couple of days has been a touch interesting. I know its only been a couple of days, and its hard to tell if there is a pattern especially since the drugs mask a lot of things but..... I don't know.

I am not sure why I have written this..... maybe to know I am not going totally bonkers?
Does the "hive mind" have suggestions about the pendant alarm thingi?

Hi @GeorgieW
I feel for you.

There are sometimes some forms or phases of dementia that resemble going downstairs - on a step, like a plateau, for some while, then a noticeable deterioration, like going down a step. Maybe a step or more in one go or a short space of time, or maybe another plateau for a while. But there is never going to be any going up a step, A skill lost, is a skill lost. Logic doesn't apply.

Maybe your mum's fall up the steps threw her or upset her, more than was realised and triggered the decline. There may be no rhyme or reason.

My OH forgot how to use the phone - both the landline and her mobile - both for making calls at first (as that's a bit more complicated even with speed dial), and then on answering a ringing phone. Just forgot.
So I terminated the mobile and told family, who from then on phone me on my mobile or landline. On a similar line, my OH v soon after that forgot how to use the tv remote control - I think she lost the understanding of how the remote linked to tv. So she asks me to put tv on or says, I don't this channel can you switch it for some different pictures.

I'm not saying that this will happen with your mum, but just my experience with my PWD, which may be relevant.

My OH, from a fall or two, but nothing serious, developed a fear of falling. Result was that she didn't really want to go out back door, as although I put up a grab handle to help, there are two shall steps down to patio, and she started asking for help. She had been using the steps without help for quite a while. Then just gave up going out that way. Result was that she then forgot how to open both the front and the back door, which I used to make sure were closed with the catch. This is, in fact, a benefit as I now have no fear of her wandering out the house.

You are doing what you think is right, so please don't make yourself feel guilty. You can't change the dementia or how it affects your mum or progresses. Just keep doing what you think is best - you can't do more.

Best wishes.

 

[Coco23]

You definitely need to go for a ride. Very jealous, miss my horse alot. Dad can't use the phone really which is OK as mum can but worries me if anything happened and he couldn't get help bit keep fingers crossed. Dad's funny comment over the weekend was that there are often ELEPHANTS about when he takes the dog a walk!!!! Who knew in Gloucestershire!!!

 

[GeorgieW]

@Coco23 Elephants in Gloucestershire eh! well who knew ❤️

@Chizz your right, once its gone its gone. She is already struggling with the TV remote so any hope of the mobile is now right out the window. As you say a skill lost is gone.... poof!

Over all she's doing OK, she is still able to dress herself and do the morning ablutions and get herself to the bathroom so right now we are all good.

I was watching a you tube video today of a lady who was describing the 7 stages with her mother and her MIL and both journeys were very different. It reminded me that while we are all sharing the same transport our journeys are very different.

Thank you both for your advice. I will stick to Ring camera's and won't bother with a SOS button, and I will cancel the phone contract - its a pointless expense now.