Refusing to eat.x

[staros12]

Hi, not sure where to start here, new to the page- my wee gran was diagnosed with dementia only a few months ago however we have seen slight signs since covid. To us my gran is the gran she has always been and will forget the odd thing or repeat once or twice. Although minor my wee gran feels she can't live with the forgetfulness and feels she has nothing left to give.. appetite has changed which can be part of the disease i know, however over the past few weeks she is refusing to eat. Always giving a reason - feels sick, can't swallow, already ate, not hungry. She has been in hospital for the past week now and still not any better. We are awaiting a diettitan but feel my gran knows what she is doing and she has mentioned that she knows what will happen if she doesn't eat..
As a family we feel utterly helpless and unsupported - as what we are told is its the dementia. We have looked into hypnotherapy however as my gran is adamant that she won't eat and doesn't want to take part in anythin as she is fine we can't go that way. It's not that she can't eat its that she doesn't want to eat and knows the possible outcome and she seems OK with that 😞

 

[sheepfield]

Ah that sounds so difficult. I have no advice or experience to share but welcome to the forum x

 

[canary]

I do hope someone is checking her swallowing.
My mum lost her swallow, felt sick at the thought of food and refused to eat/drink when she reached end of life - it is part of the dying process. However, there may be something else going on and your gran might rally
(((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))

 

[Jessbow]

Will she drink? Fortisip or Ensure would help a bit if she will.

Difficult when they set their mind to something.

 

[staros12]

Thanks for your responses.. my gran can eat and drink she just saying she doesn't want to.. the odd time if we are persistent we can get her to eat half a roll and cold meat, chips etc so her swallow is fine.. sometimes it feels like she gives excuses as a way of deflectingx we are trying g so hard to make her see the life she still has to live if she can get strength and eatx

 

[sdmhred]

My Dad lost the will towards the last few months of his life. He started to eat very little and talked about being ready to die.

Of course we all encourage him to eat and fed him his favourite foods.

As I researched I saw this was natural at the end of life so relaxed a little, and let him die in his time.

But I was sure that he wasn’t depressed - so I would get the GP to check her mood etc.

In the end I was pleased Dad was able to have some influence on his own death. In the end he had an infection I don’t think he could be bothered to fight anymore. I reflect it was as ‘good as it could be’ as he was ready and enabled to do the things he wanted prior - such as speak with old family etc

Do keep posting - it’s a tough time!