Hi... mum was diagnosed with vascular dementia last year and the last few months have been harder and harder. She has carers 3 times a day and they are angels but even they are struggling. This week she has refused her meds as she believes they aren't hers and even believes her GP has told her that. Phone calls are excessive ... 20 + a day to me plus numerous calls to her surgery. Hardly eating and has recently come out of hospital after falling and forgetting she had a lifeline on her. I have been working with her GP, care agency and social services. Social services believe she still has capacity although doctors don't believe so and on her last visit to hospital a DOLs was in place. The social worker is organising a best interest meeting. We thought it would be good to do LPAs for her so I explained the processes to her. At the end of explaining them I moved the papers and then asked her if she understood and she replied it was to do with her will. I don't feel confident getting her to sign something that she doesn't understand. She had refused to go to a home however the last few days I have seen a change in her. I had a lot of very tearful calls today... She said she doesn't understand what's happening to her and why is her memory bad. She is very confused... it's so distressing to hear her literally being tortured. We have arranged to speak tonight.... how far do I go in explaining what's happening?
Really struggling
- Thread starter Rozzer67
- Start date
I think I am saying what you already know... Your mum is distressed, refusing medication, lonely and confused. If she doesn't understand the LPA you cannot have her sign it. Perhaps you could discuss it with her GP there and the GP could make the decision regarding her capacity? Trying to explain the situation to mum is not of any use if she cannot retain the information. The issue now is to ensure mums safety in whatever form that may take. You need to involve her GP and SS and keep stressing how distressed mum is. As you say 'tortured'.
Hi....thanks for that. I think the information I have her social worker today has made him think. That's when he suggested the meeting. He is starting the paperwork for finding for a home for her so hopefully in a couple of weeks we may see some light.
I watched my Dad try and fight cancer but, and I never thought I'd say this, watching mum go through this is so much harder. Xx
I watched my Dad try and fight cancer but, and I never thought I'd say this, watching mum go through this is so much harder. Xx
