Newbie!

[Brettaboy]

I joined this morning so as I say above, I'm a newbie.

My wife was diagnosed with Dementia in Alzheimer's earlier this year and I'm having to make a lot of adjustments to our lives. There are many issues and questions and I hope this facility will be of help.

First off, my wife easily gets "a bee in her bonnet" about something and won't let it go - is this normal?
Secondly, she often remembers things which never happened, again is this usual? For example, we'll be driving along a road that we've not used before and she tells me about the changes that have been made to a property beside the road!

All thoughts gratefully received.

 

[canary]

Hello @Brettaboy and welcome to Talking Point

The made up stories are called confabulations and yes, they, as well as delusions and obsessions are part and parcel of dementia. Unfortunately, they think that they are all completely true and you will not be able to convince them otherwise.
I learnt to listen with only half a mind and make neutral noises when appropriate.

 

[Rishile]

Welcome to Talking Point @Brettaboy. I am sure you will find a lot of support and help in this forum.

Firstly, in my experience, this is very normal. My husband often gets fixated on something very trivial (I wrote a thread about his fixation on a restaurant within a Council Yard) and he won't let it go. Sometimes distraction techniques can help, Something like 'that sounds like a good idea - how about a cup of tea before we go though' although as with everything with Dementia, nothing is guaranteed.

My husband also remembers things that never happened. Some of the stories he 'remembers' are incredible. Again, if it isn't hurting anybody, what is the problem? It is pointless to argue with them. It's much better to answer with 'oh yes, the property looks much better now, doesn't it. Have they put a new front door in?' than to try and argue.

 

[Gosling]

Hello @Brettaboy and welcome to this friendly and supportive forum from me too. You will find lots of support and understanding here.
Dealing with dementia is a very tough experience for us all, and the behaviours you mention, as others have said, are quite normal.
My only advice is try not to argue or say your wife is wrong. Make non committal noises if you can.
I know you will find sound advice and understanding , or use the forum if sometimes you need to let off a bit of steam.