Hi, am new to all this & am hoping for a bit of advice. My mum has just been diagnosed with dementia, the Dr said it is way past the early stages & cannot believe how quick it has happened. Most mornings she packs everything up to 'go home' - she doesn't believe her house is where she lives (she's been there 17 years, 7 on her own since my Dad died). This morning my brother went there & she was screaming & shouting, throwing things & wouldn't calm down. She's all packed up again. This is becoming a regular occurence. We are meeting with a care agency on Tuesday to arrange someone to go in twice a day, once in the morning to hopefully reassure her but am after some advice on how to deal with this. I am also going to phone the Drs in the morning as, after the diagnoses from the memory clinic, we seem to have just been left and have no idea what to do next. It's so weird - she does all her usual things in the morning, breakfast, takes the dog in the garden, puts the cleaner round, but if you ask her if it's her house she says no. Thanks in advance x
My mum doesn't believe her home is her home
- Thread starter Doreen7
- Start date
Hi
Welcome to Talking Point. May I suggest you read the thread compassionate communication. It lists the pitfalls and helps you from bashing your head on the wall with frustration!
http://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/show...ionate-Communication-with-the-Memory-Impaired
Also make sure your Mum doesn't have a urine infection as those can makes things a whole lot worse.
Welcome to Talking Point. May I suggest you read the thread compassionate communication. It lists the pitfalls and helps you from bashing your head on the wall with frustration!
http://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/show...ionate-Communication-with-the-Memory-Impaired
Also make sure your Mum doesn't have a urine infection as those can makes things a whole lot worse.
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Hello Doreen and welcome to Talking Point
This packing to "go home" is incredibly common with dementia. If you talk to her about her home you may well discover that she describes a childhood home, but really, its a state of mind or a fantasy. What they desire is to go to place and/or time where they feel safe, know what is happening and dont feel confused and this desire is very, very strong.
Definitely tell her GP about this - he should be able to contact someone who could help her distress with medication. BTW, it will be no use trying to convince her that it really is her home - it will just make things worse. Try and distract her, or come up with some reason why she cant go home right now (eg. problems on the road
) so she might as well stay there for a while until its sorted. It known as love lies. You might find this helpful. http://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/show...ionate-Communication-with-the-Memory-Impaired
This packing to "go home" is incredibly common with dementia. If you talk to her about her home you may well discover that she describes a childhood home, but really, its a state of mind or a fantasy. What they desire is to go to place and/or time where they feel safe, know what is happening and dont feel confused and this desire is very, very strong.
Definitely tell her GP about this - he should be able to contact someone who could help her distress with medication. BTW, it will be no use trying to convince her that it really is her home - it will just make things worse. Try and distract her, or come up with some reason why she cant go home right now (eg. problems on the road
) so she might as well stay there for a while until its sorted. It known as love lies. You might find this helpful. http://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/show...ionate-Communication-with-the-Memory-Impaired