Hi I'm new to the forum and fairly new to the distress of vascular dementia. My mum was diagnosed last year with this condition and at the time was walking, talking, eating & fully functioning albeit a little slow in acknowledging some information or forgetting what she went in a room for. About 4 months ago my dad started to say that my mum was getting worse, no longer wanted to go out of the house, couldn't concentrate on anything, stopped reading the paper which she would read from front to back & taking a long time to prepare meals and then eat them and was going for a lay down most days now, she was also struggling to get the the toilet in time and so was now wearing incontinence pads all the time. 8 weeks ago my dad called me to go over as my mum had fallen in the bathroom. When I got there she was naked and unable to get up. I managed to move her and get her to standing position and then on to the bed and it was then I realised how thin my mum had become. She was unable to sit up and we managed to get her a drink using my granddaughters sippy cup. Later that day my dad called again as he said my mum was worse with constant fidgeting and taking her clothes off. When I got there, he had called an ambulance. She went in to hospital for 3 weeks and then she was discharged home with carers coming in 4 times a day. She was still unable to sit or stand & was fidgeting and rolling from side to side so constantly falling out of bed. After a couple of days she was assessed & it was reported that she needed 24 hr care. After a week at home my dad then called an ambulance again as she deteriorated. In hospital again still fidgeting & rolling, not able to sit up, having to be fed, mashed up food as unable to chew & difficulties with swallowing. Last Wednesday she was transferred to a home, not the one we would have liked as they said they weren't able to offer her the care she needed at this stage. Although the home she is in a present is nice and we had visited prior to her moving there, they have had to move her 3 times to accommodate her and is now in a bed with high sides to stop her putting her legs over the top. She is supposed to be assessed over 4 weeks but reading some of the threads on here my mums deterioration has been significantly quicker than others and we have no idea what to do. My mum is 86 and my dad is 84 & driving 1 hour round trip twice a day to visit her as myself, my sister and brother do but we are now at the point where she doesn't even open her eyes, she is in a onesie which is on back to front to prevent her from taking her clothes and pad & pants off. The fact that she recognised it was us visiting us has always given us some hope where now I'm not sure she is actually aware when anyone is there. Is my mum likely to make any improvement or will she continue in this state for months. We are all very distressed and don't know what to do.
Mum with vascular dementia
- Thread starter Daisydook
- Start date
Welcome to TP @Daisydook
What a distressing situation for you all.
Unfortunately nobody know how long this will go on. We just have to take one day at a time.
Please keep posting here as you’ll get lots of support.
What a distressing situation for you all.
Unfortunately nobody know how long this will go on. We just have to take one day at a time.
Please keep posting here as you’ll get lots of support.
Hello @Daisydook and welcome from me too.
I'm so sorry to read about your mum's deterioration and I can imagine how distressed you must all feel. As Cat says it's impossible to determine how long someone will continue at this stage. I'm afraid all you can do is be there for her and also for your dad. It won't be easy to watch your mum go through this but please do keep posting here as I know you will get much needed support from other members.
Wishing you strength for the times to come.
I'm so sorry to read about your mum's deterioration and I can imagine how distressed you must all feel. As Cat says it's impossible to determine how long someone will continue at this stage. I'm afraid all you can do is be there for her and also for your dad. It won't be easy to watch your mum go through this but please do keep posting here as I know you will get much needed support from other members.
Wishing you strength for the times to come.
Thank you Cat27 just needed to get it off my chest as the people that understand are my family and they feel the same as me and the rest don't really understand. I just feel helpless.
With vascular dementia the deterioration tends to happen in "steps" and it looks like there have been several very steep steps very close together, which has obviously been a shock.
Unfortunately, there is no way of knowing how long she will be like this. You just have to take it one day at a time.
((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))
Unfortunately, there is no way of knowing how long she will be like this. You just have to take it one day at a time.
((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))
Thank you Izzy its just happened so fast, we have no clue but will keep reading the threads and updating.
