Just this minute joined

[CaPattinson]

I would like to say 'hello'. I have read your thread and I, too, feel for you and would like to post more. I have to work in a few minutes but after I've finished I will come back and share with you some of my experiences and thoughts

Love

Thanks Helen I look forward to sharing some of your experiences and thoughts. Waiting to hear from you! Get fed up sometimes talkin about myself but its a two way thing isn't it? Its both omforting and upsetting hearing sad stories and hopefully not so sad sometimes, but the very crux of this forum is about a.z. so happy stories are unlikely. OOh I do ramble sometimes!!? luv xx christine

 

[Helen33]

Hello Christine,

but the very crux of this forum is about a.z. so happy stories are unlikely.

I felt there were lots of happy stories Christine. Alan had a semantic dementia of the fronto temperal lobe which affected his speech and language (and much more later on). I didn't see why having this kind of dementia meant that Alan couldn't have a good life and I often shared our day with other Talking Point members. Here are some of the pictures of Alan taken only last year.









Enabling Alan to have this life was not automatic. I had to learn from scratch because I had no experience and no knowledge. We were told there was nothing that could be done to help him and that little was known, if anything, about this disease. We were abandoned without any information or support.

Eventually I came across the Alzheimers Society which led me to Talking Point and I learnt just about everything from here. It was hugely beneficial to both Alan and myself. Of course, Alan never knew that the quality of his life was partly due to the support and information I received from this site.

I have forgotten what I originally wanted to talk to you about It'll come. I know it is something to do with grief.

Thank you for sharing on my blog

Love

 

[CaPattinson]

happy times

Hi helen yes you both looked happy and Alan - a distinguished good looking man. I'm sorry you had a fight on your hands to get the best care for him that certainly unforgivable. I think originally I was replying to you having been in counselling and looked at the word grief and were stuck. On post I wrote was a lot of wondering wat grief was and bursting into tears at my hospital appointment. (Not sure about all this cos so many stories it gets confusing!) If I'm not talking about you just let me know. But I thought u were going away for a few days and taking sum tenna lady stuff cos u were gonna be playing hippos and dogs!? Grannyg (not sure of name) sent me utube link of singing hippo and dog and said u were dog and she was the hippo! I hope I've got this right or u will think I'm a complete idiot! So, if u r going away have a hoot of time, Helen, because I think that's wat ur planning!

 

[CaPattinson]

going back

Hi, I read through your description of how you feel and then read all the posts so far including the one from Padraig. I found them all helpful but I called this timing because it's only struck me just recently how different my father looks. How lost and helpless he is soemtimes, so like the child and unlike you I haven't lost him yet,(though it worries me sometimes he may one day decide to stay in bed and then switch off whilst I am away) but for now he is still here and I'm lucky in that sometimes I see the old him. And this is where i am going, very slowly.
Now I mentioned Padraig simply because I think in his way that is a good way forward and I'm not knocking counselling, it maybe the best for you but I see value in his post as well and from that I draw strength and I say to you; When she was ill and not looking like the person you remembered can you recall a day when you suddenly saw her as she was, it may only have been a glimpse a flash, it made you happy, if only briefly - inside you find that picture, believe me it will exist and from that you will begin to heal. I'm storing mine up, silly things that you know she knew she would never have done when of her right mind, but they made you laugh and made her laugh. I think you may find you did the same, open that treasure chest with or without counselling help.
And talk to all these wonderful people here. i know I'm going too. Andy51058

i Andy, thank you for your thoughts. I have to say that since being a member it is becoming a little easier to remember mum before that awful image that used to come into my head when I thought of her. By putting my feelings on show and reading other peoples stories and getting their support has helped and keeps helping so like u I'll be here for some time to come. Christine