Hello and any advice

[Welshman1969]

Hi


I have an elderly father and step mother 80 and 84 respectively. Both have dementia, father vascular and step mother alzheimers. They currently live in a council property and I'm hoping they will get moved to sheltered accommodation soon.

I feel that both are deteriorating and they are struggling with each other in different respects. My father is confidence is going and gets very shouty and upset. My step mother is extremely forgetful and very argumentative.

I'm 250 miles away and I'm just wondering if now is the time to see if we can get them some support or atleast make them known to the social care workers as literally they are almost off the radar to anyone, not known to anyone offically, apart from doctors and hospital.

If anyone could please advise of what I can do or how I start wheels, In motion I'd appreciate that.

 

[Izzy]

Welcome to the forum @Welshman1969.

I’m sorry to hear about your parents. It must be hard for you being so far away from them. I do think it’s time to look at support for them. I think an assessment of their needs would be the first step. You can contact their local Social Services and ask for this to happen - emphasising their vulnerability. You might find this link useful -

Assessment for care and support in England

What are care assessments and how can people with dementia and their carers access them? This information is for care and support in England.

www.alzheimers.org.uk

 

[jay6]

Welcome Welshman. I agree with Izzy, Definitely time to look at support for them. Social Services and doctor should be able to help them. They are vulnerable. Good luck.

 

[SAP]

Yes looking into how they can be supported in the area they live in will be a benefit to all of you. Two people with dementia , caring for each other is not uncommon but does need a good support system around them.
You say you are hoping that they will move to sheltered housing soon. Just a word of caution that this step may not last for long as one or other of them get to the point where they need 24/7 care. The only reason I mention this as moving home can be very difficult for people with dementia and may exacerbate their conditions.
Also it would be worth you looking to see if you or they have a local carers centre

Support where you live | Carers UK

www.carersuk.org

Usually are carers centre will offer telephone support for a family member living in a different authority especially with things like how to navigate the L.As care system and social care.