Glad To Meet Others & learn from them

[mightyaphrodite]

I still work during the day & care for my husband at night. He has been suffering from Dementia for 6 years.

The one thing I share with friends? I do not correct my husband’s statements or illusions. When he asks if we are going to drive over to his mom’s house, I tell him, “maybe tomorrow… “ When he got angry about my bathing & shaving routine & told me, “You don’t do a very good job, I think I’m going to fire you,” I said, “I understand.” He forgets what he said in 10 minutes so correcting him would frustrate him … who benefits from THAT? Certainly not my dear husband.

I looked this forum up because of the constant gibberish & noises he has started making in the last month. I appreciate others insight & thank you!

 

[Izzy]

Welcome to the forum @mightyaphrodite.

I’m sorry to read about your husband’s dementia. I’m glad you’ve found this forum and I’m sure others will be along soon to share their experiences.

 

[mamma Mel]

Hi 👋

 

[maisiecat]

Hi, I don't know if its any help but an Admiral Nurse said to me about my husband. The 2 of you are on opposite sides of a bridge. He can't move towards you because your world no longer makes any sense to him, You have to move towards his reality and try and communicate within that. At the time it made me cry buckets but I have applied it and it does help. I deflect rather than correct. My husband is in a Dementia home and is totally delusional but sounds oh so convincing. You will get a lot of help on here and its such a relief to be able to offload

 

[Izzy]

@maisiecat - that sounds like such a good explanation you got from the Admiral Nurse. It makes sense.

@mamma Mel you might find their helpline useful.

Admiral Nurse Dementia Helpline

Dementia UK is a charity that provides Admiral Nurses for families affected by dementia. Call our Dementia Helpline to find out how we can support you.

www.dementiauk.org

 

[SeaSwallow]

Hello and welcome from me also. You might also find the attached link useful, although from your first post you do seem to be following its advice.

Compassionate Communication with the Memory Impaired

The following piece was posted a while ago on DSF and made a big impression on me. It is something I have referred to time after time and tried hard to follow. We have many new members who may not have seen it before. Yesterday I posted it on another Thread but thought it might be helpful if...

forum.alzheimers.org.uk

 

[mamma Mel]

Hi, I don't know if its any help but an Admiral Nurse said to me about my husband. The 2 of you are on opposite sides of a bridge. He can't move towards you because your world no longer makes any sense to him, You have to move towards his reality and try and communicate within that. At the time it made me cry buckets but I have applied it and it does help. I deflect rather than correct. My husband is in a Dementia home and is totally delusional but sounds oh so convincing. You will get a lot of help on here and its such a relief to be able to offload

Hi thanks so much for input it really helps and I really appreciate it. Xx

 

[mightyaphrodite]

Hi, I don't know if it’s any help but an Admiral Nurse said to me about my husband. The 2 of you are on opposite sides of a bridge. He can't move towards you because your world no longer makes any sense to him, You have to move towards his reality and try and communicate within that. At the time it made me cry buckets but I have applied it and it does help. I deflect rather than correct. My husband is in a Dementia home and is totally delusional but sounds oh so convincing. You will get a lot of help on here and its such a relief to be able to offload

GREAT analogy! Thank you!!

 

[mamma Mel]

GREAT analogy! Thank you!!

Thank you so much 😊 xxx