My husband was diagnosed in January this year but the problems were there at least two years before. It was a one hour consultation at the Memory Clinic and only involved one hour of questions and no spatial testing at all and was given by a Russian woman whose accent neither of us could understand; she was from southern Russia near to Ubekestan. No empathy at all and diagnosed Alzheimers mild to moderate. I asked her if she was sure that it was Alzheimers as he has a degree of heart disease and could it be Vascular Dementia instead as he has also got s degree of heart disease but she became angry at my question and put it in her report to our GP. She was not the consultant clinical psychologist . I just wonder if the diagnosis is correct as my husband seems to be deteriorating quite quickly ...putting things in all the wrong places and hardly able to string a sentence with any real meaning. An MRI scan of the brain could not be done as he has a pacemaker which would have been damaged by an MRI scan.. So many things seem to be happening which are all wrong even nearly pouring milk into the toaster. I just feel desolate as I Iove him but lose patience so often even though i try so hard not to. I just feel so bereft. How does one cope with these grief stricken feelings?
Feeling so grief stricken.
- Thread starter Mrs Humphrey
- Start date
It’s so incredibly difficult @Mrs Humphrey. Posting here & talking things through seems to help a lot of people.
Thank you .I will try to be that rainbow. it is so hard and I know i am struggling with my emotions.
Its very hard these days as although Dementia now seems to be on TV adverts and on social media it still does feel like its the forgotten Disease and finding the correct help and support is like walking through a minefield! When my MIL had her memory tests etc it was a very similar experience now in this day and age you have to be so careful what you say as it can be taken totally out of context and the meaning twisted, the lady doing MIL's tests also had avery very strong accent and I have to say that MIL found it hard to understand her at all so i think she was just saying yes or no to many questions. In this particular testing setting you should be able to say can the Tester be an English speaking person with English as their first language wherever possible when dealing with Elderly English speaking people just like you can ask for an interpreter for other languages, after all My Mum was a down to earth Cockney speaking woman and it would have been like sending her to Russia to test an elderly Russian person, it has nothing to do with the expertise or training of the person doing the test it is all about the person taking it and their ability to understand what they are being asked?
MIL couldnt have a MRI either as she had metal clips in her head from a brain hemorrhage in the 1970's in the end she was diagnosed with mixed dementia ( Alzheimers/vascular. ) Dealing with dementia and the change in the person who has it cannot be underestimated it is one of the hardest and saddest challenges we have ever faced and the support and info on here is amazing mostly because you see that you are far from being alone going through this and you can identify with so many others. We all struggle with our emotions and this is perfectly normal so allow yourself to have the feelings that you have and dont beat yourself up too much even though we all do at times regardless. I hope you get the help you both need.
MIL couldnt have a MRI either as she had metal clips in her head from a brain hemorrhage in the 1970's in the end she was diagnosed with mixed dementia ( Alzheimers/vascular. ) Dealing with dementia and the change in the person who has it cannot be underestimated it is one of the hardest and saddest challenges we have ever faced and the support and info on here is amazing mostly because you see that you are far from being alone going through this and you can identify with so many others. We all struggle with our emotions and this is perfectly normal so allow yourself to have the feelings that you have and dont beat yourself up too much even though we all do at times regardless. I hope you get the help you both need.
