Do I move or stay?

Andy63

Registered User
Jul 30, 2022
31
0
I am struggling with this question. My wife's Altzheimers is making it difficult fot her to manage the stairs. I need to prepare to bring her downstairs permanently by having a bed in the dining room. However, the bathroom is upstairs! If I add one downstairs it will make the house look odd and may reduce it value? Should I just bite the bullet and find a bungalow. Has anyone found themselves in a similar situation? Comments very welcome.
 

DaftDad

Registered User
Apr 8, 2024
64
0
I am struggling with this question. My wife's Altzheimers is making it difficult fot her to manage the stairs. I need to prepare to bring her downstairs permanently by having a bed in the dining room. However, the bathroom is upstairs! If I add one downstairs it will make the house look odd and may reduce it value? Should I just bite the bullet and find a bungalow. Has anyone found themselves in a similar situation? Comments very welcome.
Not due to dementia, but my own physical access needs, we bit the bullet and moved to a bungalow last year, instead of trying to put in stairlifts or downstairs bathing facilities. It was an expensive move, but definitely worth it. If you can afford it, I would suggest moving, because even if your wife cannot remain at home for the longer term and needs residential care, your own needs might change over the forthcoming years, and in-home adaptations are very expensive and there is very limited funding now for Disabled Facilities Grants.

Be aware that moving house might make your wife's dementia worsen, as she will be somewhere new and unfamiliar.
 

Cerisy

Registered User
Jun 9, 2021
66
0
Would installing a stairlift work for your wife? Whole cheaper and less distraction!
 

Blissy

Registered User
Jan 29, 2023
173
0
Stair lift sounds a good solution to me as well. Depending on your income and savings you may be entitled to a grant for it. Even if you have to pay you'll get vat relief and that can make a big difference.
 

Sarasa

Volunteer Host
Apr 13, 2018
7,344
0
Nottinghamshire
A stair lift would be fine as long as you are around to supervise its use. I know that companies might be reluctant to install a lift for someone with dementia is case they get confused about using it safely.
I think I agree with the idea of moving or at least seeing what's available. Round here bungalows are in short supply so it might take some time to find one that meets your needs/
 

Brianna

New member
Dec 17, 2023
7
0
An alternative to a stairlift (safer but more expensive) might be a domestic lift (eg Stilz). I don't need one yet but have been looking into it, and it could possibly add value to your house.
 

karaokePete

Registered User
Jul 23, 2017
6,590
0
N Ireland
I was in a similar situation with my wife and we bit the bullet and moved to a bungalow.

We got lucky and got one in a quiet area and with nice neighbours.

No regrets.
 

SkyeD

Registered User
Oct 3, 2022
197
0
As an alternative to the upheaval of moving, what about a bed downstairs and a commode? Even as a temporary measure.
Domestic lifts take up a lot of room in a house - my friend has been quoted 16 grand through the local authority (for their disabled daughter), and it would take up third of their living space when you factor in the amount of space needed for access if a wheelchair is needed.
 

DaftDad

Registered User
Apr 8, 2024
64
0
As an alternative to the upheaval of moving, what about a bed downstairs and a commode? Even as a temporary measure.
Domestic lifts take up a lot of room in a house - my friend has been quoted 16 grand through the local authority (for their disabled daughter), and it would take up third of their living space when you factor in the amount of space needed for access if a wheelchair is needed.
Yes, installing such equipment is actually incredibly expensive and I was told putting in a stairlift would actually reduce the property's value, as the market for 3-bed semis is mainly families and they don't want a stairlift taking up space and being a potential hazard to children. Also, for anything other than a nice width, straight set of stairs, stairlifts are VERY expensive, the stairlift companies tell you lies by saying they can be resold at a later date (they can, but for peanuts). Also, a non-compliant/difficult adult with dementia might actually be at risk when using a stairlift, even if supervised/assisted.

My personal experience as a person with an acquired disability is that the best solution is to move to a more accessible home, if at all possible. But that was my experience.
 

Andy63

Registered User
Jul 30, 2022
31
0
Not due to dementia, but my own physical access needs, we bit the bullet and moved to a bungalow last year, instead of trying to put in stairlifts or downstairs bathing facilities. It was an expensive move, but definitely worth it. If you can afford it, I would suggest moving, because even if your wife cannot remain at home for the longer term and needs residential care, your own needs might change over the forthcoming years, and in-home adaptations are very expensive and there is very limited funding now for Disabled Facilities Grants.

Be aware that moving house might make your wife's dementia worsen, as she will be somewhere new and unfamiliar.
Hi DaftDad
Yes, you make a good point. Any adaption I do will cost the same as moving and will make the house look a bit odd, so another negative. It would be better to sleep.on the same floor of Lesley too. I have been really struggling with this and your comments have been really helpful. Thank you.
 

Andy63

Registered User
Jul 30, 2022
31
0
Not due to dementia, but my own physical access needs, we bit the bullet and moved to a bungalow last year, instead of trying to put in stairlifts or downstairs bathing facilities. It was an expensive move, but definitely worth it. If you can afford it, I would suggest moving, because even if your wife cannot remain at home for the longer term and needs residential care, your own needs might change over the forthcoming years, and in-home adaptations are very expensive and there is very limited funding now for Disabled Facilities Grants.

Be aware that moving house might make your wife's dementia worsen, as she will be somewhere new and unfamiliar.

Would installing a stairlift work for your wife? Whole cheaper and less distraction!
 

Andy63

Registered User
Jul 30, 2022
31
0
Thanks for the suggestion. I made enquiries and was told it would be sadly unsuitable for Lesley
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
82,044
0
Kent
I`d move to a bungalow @Andy63 but hope you would have family help and support to pack up and move.

I presume if you move to a bungalow you would be downsizing. This would involve getting rid of a lot of stuff.
 

Andy63

Registered User
Jul 30, 2022
31
0
Stair lift sounds a good solution to me as well. Depending on your income and savings you may be entitled to a grant for it. Even if you have to pay you'll get vat relief and that can make a big difference.
Hi Blissey. Thanks for your comments. I have been informed a chair lift would be unsuitable for Lesley?
 

Andy63

Registered User
Jul 30, 2022
31
0
Yes, installing such equipment is actually incredibly expensive and I was told putting in a stairlift would actually reduce the property's value, as the market for 3-bed semis is mainly families and they don't want a stairlift taking up space and being a potential hazard to children. Also, for anything other than a nice width, straight set of stairs, stairlifts are VERY expensive, the stairlift companies tell you lies by saying they can be resold at a later date (they can, but for peanuts). Also, a non-compliant/difficult adult with dementia might actually be at risk when using a stairlift, even if supervised/assisted.

My personal experience as a person with an acquired disability is that the best solution is to move to a more accessible home, if at all possible. But that was my experience.
Thank you DaftDad, you comments are very helpful and make a lot of sense
 

Andy63

Registered User
Jul 30, 2022
31
0
I`d move to a bungalow @Andy63 but hope you would have family help and support to pack up and move.

I presume if you move to a bungalow you would be downsizing. This would involve getting rid of a lot of stuff.
Not downsizing too much, but still a good excuse to rid of 50 years of 'collecting' stuff!
 

Andy63

Registered User
Jul 30, 2022
31
0
A stair lift would be fine as long as you are around to supervise its use. I know that companies might be reluctant to install a lift for someone with dementia is case they get confused about using it safely.
I think I agree with the idea of moving or at least seeing what's available. Round here bungalows are in short supply so it might take some time to find one that meets your needs/
Hi Sarasa. Yes, I was advised a chairlift would be unsuitable for Lesley. Thinking of getting a Bungalow in Bexhill (God's waiting Room🤣). They have good services there for the elderly
 

Andy63

Registered User
Jul 30, 2022
31
0
Stair lift sounds a good solution to me as well. Depending on your income and savings you may be entitled to a grant for it. Even if you have to pay you'll get vat relief and that can make a big difference.

An alternative to a stairlift (safer but more expensive) might be a domestic lift (eg Stilz). I don't need one yet but have been looking into it, and it could possibly add value to your house.
Hi. I tried a friend's lift for Lesley and because of the confined space she went into a blind panic. Luckily we had not sent the lift up, just closed the door!