Hi to everyone,
I am from Michigan and My Mother was diagnosed w/Dementia approx 1/1/2 yrs ago (she is 84 yrs old). It progressed quickly until about 8 months ago when I was living with her I realized w/her forgetting how to cook, clean, ask same questions through out the same day, found her sheets full of her going to bathroom possibly having diarrhea while cleaning her sheets that I just couldn't do it anymore. She needed someone to care for her 24/7 to protect her. I was working and it was difficult for me to make that decision...I felt a lot of guilt. But I didn't want to come home to find her hurt and I knew it was the best decision for her. My sisters and I decided to put her in a memory care assisted living. The first 3 months she seemed ok still forgetful but the adjustment to another place got her very confused. But she was adjusting pretty well. She frequently got UTI's and when she did (pre dementia) she would be very confused and we immediately knew she had one. Fast FWD to her in assisted living and it got worse. I visited her every day and sometimes 2-3 x's a day to make sure she was eating well and being taken care of. Then the Covid 19 lock down hit us all and she did not see us for a good month. We are an extremely close family and not seeing her daughters crushed her and I a m sure she wanted to give up not understanding or remembering what was going on. When I visited her through her window she switched from English to talking Spanish (she is Venezuelan) and told me stories of someone trying to hurt her and they were saying she was going to die. Not thinking anything of it other than the UTI, I dismissed it. Although, we did get to speak to her via phone she definitely deteriorated quickly in isolation due to virus and ESP into severe dehydration. Had I not forced my sisters 10 days ago to pull out because she looked so ill, she would of died of kidney failure. The day we did (10 days ago) we immediately took her to ER. She was completely delirious not able to speak, walk, talk etc. They gave her a pint of fluids but said she def could use more. She cried the whole time and the doc was so amazing allowed me to enter the hospital a few hours later believing she needed to be home w/her family to recover whether it was permanently or for short time (I/we didn't want her to die alone if that was going to happen). The next 7 days was stressful & exhausting but I was ok with it knowing she was in good hands. The most disturbing part was the 2nd day w/me she started to read looking anywhere , focused on blanket, wall, air as if she was reading a book (she used to love reading) but this time it went on for 5-7 hrs. She worked herself up so badly while reading stating they were telling her she was a bad person , that her kids were going to die, that if I turned on the stove (cuz I was cooking), I was going to burn myself, she was crying, hysterical, hyperventilating. I tried to calm her down but nothing I said worked. The following days were the same reading and when she got upset, I would try to divert her. She would cry but not in hysterics. Finally after 7 days, without getting any sleep, I took her to my sisters for a break. She has been there for 5 days and the first 3 days she was better and not reading that much. AND more importantly all that food and water along w/the med's for UTI made her stronger she was moving around so much better. The reading would start and my sister would divert...then yesterday and today my sister said she got really upset and couldn't calm her down. When the doctor initially asked me about her condition the next day I took her home, I told him about the reading focused on anything talking a straight 6-7 hours w/o a breathe...scared me. I told him it sounds funny but her behavior reminded me of someone who was possessed, demonic or on drugs..it was completely bizarre. He explained to me that he has seen some psychotic behaviors w/Dementia. If you knew my Mother, she is the most amazing, caring individual who has a great heart. If it wasn't for this bizarre behavior, I would rate my mom's progression from a 1-10 to a solid 7 or 8. We are desperate to find anyone who may have experienced this behavior with a loved one. I googled to see if I could find anything but was unsuccessful.
Any suggestions or referrals would be greatly appreciated .
Thank YOU!
I am from Michigan and My Mother was diagnosed w/Dementia approx 1/1/2 yrs ago (she is 84 yrs old). It progressed quickly until about 8 months ago when I was living with her I realized w/her forgetting how to cook, clean, ask same questions through out the same day, found her sheets full of her going to bathroom possibly having diarrhea while cleaning her sheets that I just couldn't do it anymore. She needed someone to care for her 24/7 to protect her. I was working and it was difficult for me to make that decision...I felt a lot of guilt. But I didn't want to come home to find her hurt and I knew it was the best decision for her. My sisters and I decided to put her in a memory care assisted living. The first 3 months she seemed ok still forgetful but the adjustment to another place got her very confused. But she was adjusting pretty well. She frequently got UTI's and when she did (pre dementia) she would be very confused and we immediately knew she had one. Fast FWD to her in assisted living and it got worse. I visited her every day and sometimes 2-3 x's a day to make sure she was eating well and being taken care of. Then the Covid 19 lock down hit us all and she did not see us for a good month. We are an extremely close family and not seeing her daughters crushed her and I a m sure she wanted to give up not understanding or remembering what was going on. When I visited her through her window she switched from English to talking Spanish (she is Venezuelan) and told me stories of someone trying to hurt her and they were saying she was going to die. Not thinking anything of it other than the UTI, I dismissed it. Although, we did get to speak to her via phone she definitely deteriorated quickly in isolation due to virus and ESP into severe dehydration. Had I not forced my sisters 10 days ago to pull out because she looked so ill, she would of died of kidney failure. The day we did (10 days ago) we immediately took her to ER. She was completely delirious not able to speak, walk, talk etc. They gave her a pint of fluids but said she def could use more. She cried the whole time and the doc was so amazing allowed me to enter the hospital a few hours later believing she needed to be home w/her family to recover whether it was permanently or for short time (I/we didn't want her to die alone if that was going to happen). The next 7 days was stressful & exhausting but I was ok with it knowing she was in good hands. The most disturbing part was the 2nd day w/me she started to read looking anywhere , focused on blanket, wall, air as if she was reading a book (she used to love reading) but this time it went on for 5-7 hrs. She worked herself up so badly while reading stating they were telling her she was a bad person , that her kids were going to die, that if I turned on the stove (cuz I was cooking), I was going to burn myself, she was crying, hysterical, hyperventilating. I tried to calm her down but nothing I said worked. The following days were the same reading and when she got upset, I would try to divert her. She would cry but not in hysterics. Finally after 7 days, without getting any sleep, I took her to my sisters for a break. She has been there for 5 days and the first 3 days she was better and not reading that much. AND more importantly all that food and water along w/the med's for UTI made her stronger she was moving around so much better. The reading would start and my sister would divert...then yesterday and today my sister said she got really upset and couldn't calm her down. When the doctor initially asked me about her condition the next day I took her home, I told him about the reading focused on anything talking a straight 6-7 hours w/o a breathe...scared me. I told him it sounds funny but her behavior reminded me of someone who was possessed, demonic or on drugs..it was completely bizarre. He explained to me that he has seen some psychotic behaviors w/Dementia. If you knew my Mother, she is the most amazing, caring individual who has a great heart. If it wasn't for this bizarre behavior, I would rate my mom's progression from a 1-10 to a solid 7 or 8. We are desperate to find anyone who may have experienced this behavior with a loved one. I googled to see if I could find anything but was unsuccessful.
Any suggestions or referrals would be greatly appreciated .
Thank YOU!
