We noticed mum stopped cooking for herself around 2 years ago. As the carer is not contracted to use the cooker. I cook meals and freeze them. This has been more and more challenging. Plus seems the assistance cannot really keep up with mum's changing condition. Long story, but everyone has a story to tell. Good to be amongst others that understand. I haven't really reached out to anyone before. But I'm losing myself, so this needs to change.
Cooking/providing meals.
- Thread starter powellk36
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@powellk36 I spent years doing all Mum's cooking and keeping her freezer stocked. With hindsight, I wish I's alternated between home cooked and ready meals.
Mum's carers would cook but there's a limited amount of meals which can be prepared, cooked and eaten in the allocated hour.
Mum's carers would cook but there's a limited amount of meals which can be prepared, cooked and eaten in the allocated hour.
@My Mum's Daughter, It doesn't seem to get any better. As i've slowly been told that certain foods mum eats, that she doesn't eat them anymore. So that is one challenge. At times, I've also noticed that mum will defrost a meal, eat what she wants, then puts the meal back into the freezer. So this is something else we need to monitor. Most times I like to cook, but sometimes I just can't keep up. Yes I've brought some meals. That and the other challenges are taking up more and more time.
@powellk36 will the carer not even heat a meal in the microwave and sit with your Mum to encourage her to eat? If this is the case, you might need to look changing either the carer or her contract.
Time, yes dementia is a thief that increasingly robs us of our time. Don't be afraid to admit that it's all too much and when the time comes, investigate residential care.
Time, yes dementia is a thief that increasingly robs us of our time. Don't be afraid to admit that it's all too much and when the time comes, investigate residential care.
I agree that you should use a mixture of home cooked and ready meals. As well as the supermarket ready meals there are specialist companies that supply ready meals. Wiltshire Farm Foods is one.
It sounds as if your mother is getting to the stage where someone needs to prepare her meals for her, certainly her hot meal as she's at risk of food poisoning if she keeps defrosting and refreezing half eaten meals. People with dementia get to the stage where they can’t organise themselves and need a lot of prompting to do things.
And, yes, dementia is a thief of time and it takes more and more from you as the disease progresses. It will swallow you up if you don’t put measures in place.
It sounds as if your mother is getting to the stage where someone needs to prepare her meals for her, certainly her hot meal as she's at risk of food poisoning if she keeps defrosting and refreezing half eaten meals. People with dementia get to the stage where they can’t organise themselves and need a lot of prompting to do things.
And, yes, dementia is a thief of time and it takes more and more from you as the disease progresses. It will swallow you up if you don’t put measures in place.
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Hi
We have been doing similar. Cooking and freezing our extra portions of home cooked food, ready meals from various supermarkets and Wiltshire farm foods. Dad can warm something in the microwave but he is forgetting to get anything out of the freezer intermittently . We are trying to organise some extra help but so far local care agencies have no availability to assist with an evening meal, which is where we thought we could start. I can imagine it will get to the point where he cannot operate the microwave at all.
We have been doing similar. Cooking and freezing our extra portions of home cooked food, ready meals from various supermarkets and Wiltshire farm foods. Dad can warm something in the microwave but he is forgetting to get anything out of the freezer intermittently . We are trying to organise some extra help but so far local care agencies have no availability to assist with an evening meal, which is where we thought we could start. I can imagine it will get to the point where he cannot operate the microwave at all.
Hi I agree, at times the carer will warm up the meal, and mum is generally prompted to take the meal out of the freezer in the morning. Yes, the microwave also becomes an obstacle, that mum sometimes forgets to use. Generally caring agencies arrange what they can and can't do. Warming up is fine if required, however they are not insured to cook.
Yes, we could change the agency. This is the 2nd agency we have engaged in 3 years. The 1st agency continually ignored signs that mum was getting worse. This agency, specifically the carer is a very good carer. But we really need to find a longer term solution.
Yes, we could change the agency. This is the 2nd agency we have engaged in 3 years. The 1st agency continually ignored signs that mum was getting worse. This agency, specifically the carer is a very good carer. But we really need to find a longer term solution.
Not insured to cook? I’ve never heard of that before. I thought that carers generally only heat up food because there isn’t time to prepare a meal from scratch.
Unfortunately, this is one of the things that is made clear when we started using them. We have compromised on some, such as providing meals. But they arrange cleaning, days out heating up food etc. Considering the other things they do, it's not asking too much of them..
They also provide very good communication on a daily basis, which is even more important. Carers unfortunately, are not an extension of the family,.
They also provide very good communication on a daily basis, which is even more important. Carers unfortunately, are not an extension of the family,.
It sounds as though the care company is working well so let's forget the idea of changing.
Other ideas-
We have a local, old-fashioned café that will plate up a meal to take away
A friend arranged to meals to be delivered by his local pub (worked well)
Carveries usually do a take away
Fish and chip shops
I'm in no way suggesting that these are used daily but a day or two a week would give you a break.
Other ideas-
We have a local, old-fashioned café that will plate up a meal to take away
A friend arranged to meals to be delivered by his local pub (worked well)
Carveries usually do a take away
Fish and chip shops
I'm in no way suggesting that these are used daily but a day or two a week would give you a break.
Sounds like some great ideas. We looked at alternatives before, perhaps will need to investigate again.
Sometimes, when I'm not working, I will take my out to a carvery.
These can be seen as treats as well.
As mum was born and raised in Jamaica, she likes food from there. So adds another layer of complexity.
Thank you for the suggestion.
Sometimes, when I'm not working, I will take my out to a carvery.
These can be seen as treats as well.
As mum was born and raised in Jamaica, she likes food from there. So adds another layer of complexity.
Thank you for the suggestion.
Hi @powellk36 this company says it delivers Englandwide https://caribbeanmeals.co.uk, I'm sure there be more around. My mum is restricting her diet more and more and most meals are too big for her - children portions are more than adequate for her or even some meals designed for slimmers as the portion size is smaller.
A home produced frozen meal can be microwaved from frozen, it may not've been blast chilled and end up in absolutely top visual condition when cooked through but it'll still be fine.
BUT doesnt depend on a PWD getting it out of the freezer ready to defrost, was my point)
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