Really struggling to get adequate care for my mum. She is now middle stages of semantic and frontal lobal dementia. My siblings and i have POA for finance and health and wellbeing. He deals with finance, she put herself as main carer. They have stolen mums bank card, won't allow her to spend any of her own money unless they spend it for her - never allowed to make her own decisions as to what to buy (for house purcheses - never allowed to buy clothes). Siblings refuse for me to have bank card to take mum shopping, often only small amount of money in her purse. They refuse to buy in adequate care package, mum in excruciating pain from hip on paracetamol twice a day when the carers have half hour visits. Mum not washed, cleaned teeth, changed clothes, brushed hair, eaten proper meals for 6 days - carers say she refuses. Mum incontinent of urine - dribbles constantly and smells awful when I visit weekly. I provide assistance with personal care once per week at my visit. Dog excrement on carpets from her pet that went to sleep 9 months agoe - they refused to release funds for new flooring so I've paid it - big argument to get reimbursed - now paid back. Siblings refused social care assessment when I arranged it a few months ago, told mum they were going to take her house. Both refuse for me to see bank statements. Both refuse for her to have adequate pain relief because this would mean additional private care costs. Court of protection informed - said it was sibling rivalry! Next steps???
Abuse of POA
- Thread starter middlemiss
- Start date
So the social services aren't involved? I say involve them asap. If you flag mum up as a vulnerable adult and maybe let them know some of your concerns, then they should investigate. Hopefully a good social worker would take a glance at the situation and see that mum's needs aren't being met. I'm not saying this will sort out all the problems but it might make your siblings think twice about how they're carrying on, if they think 'official' eyes are on them too, as well as yours.
Report them to the SS...NOW!!! and drop a line to the OPG about financial abuse by Attorney under POA....I can't see any reason why you couldn't have a word with the local Police too...oh and Mum's GP too about their failure to care for her health.
middlemiss this is awful, I truly feel for you and for your Mum
To know that this is going on makes me feel so angry that somebody can abuse (and neglect) not only a vulnerable adult, but their mother!!
I would have no hesitation in ringing SS right now, and even as suggested, the police.
Sending you both a huge hug
x
To know that this is going on makes me feel so angry that somebody can abuse (and neglect) not only a vulnerable adult, but their mother!!
I would have no hesitation in ringing SS right now, and even as suggested, the police.
Sending you both a huge hug
x
I live in uk but have same problems my sister and husband do all my mothers finace and clear dog ****,they screwing my mother out of all her money taken her jewlery..I told samething sibling rivalry..i know unable help you visa versa but it common and this illness shows what family can be which not the caring people you think
