26 yrs old. Worried about FTD because of maternal uncle and symptoms.

[~Raine]

anhedonia could well be because all this worrying about everything constantly is simply sucking the joy out of your life.
You realise and see so many little bits and peices- that in its self is contra dementia- most sufferers have no insight whatsoever.
If you have the insight to know that you are not eating enough, eat more frequently- Many people with dementia forget they have eaten at all, and consequently end up overweight because they eat too much, forgetting they have already eaten

You almost eem the opposite of ADHD- you seem totally focussed on your own wellbeing, rather than lacking the ability to focus.

Looking at the side effects of Focalin ER 20mg, I'd want off them if i possibly could! Lots of side effects

I'm not sure, the anhedonia and apathy hit me along with the memory issues really hard and out of nowhere once I started going downhill, so not sure. It feels like I'm just numb now and I have to force myself to do things or I'll just sit here focusing on how awful I feel. I wasn't sure about the insight since I know some people remain coherent enough to see their shortcomings until a certain point, but not sure.

I was diagnosed with ADHD even before this, I feel like I can hardly focus at all on anything now and I get frustrated trying to find something to do because nothing sates me. Things I used to like don't seem to do anything anymore either, I can feel a big difference when trying to watch youtube creators or tv shows I like. I just feel incapable of feeling anything.

I might look into a different medication after trying this a bit longer, I've only been on it since late April. It seems to help my apathy a little but not by much.

I'm having a hard time recalling conversations and events too, which is what's honestly stressing me the most. I can remember some, but others I just can't. I dunno. I feel like I'm hardly here.

 

[~Raine]

Update: Head pressure on right front side along head and occasionally left back side and behind my right eye feel more intense the past two days, and in turn makes it harder to think, idk if it's more brain damage if that's what it is but I'm going crazy. Also tinnitus has been more frequent, driving me even MORE crazy.

Memory is still suffering, leaving things open/forgetting where I've put something minutes after I've put it down, struggling to remember things that have happened during the day or things I've done, sometimes things I've said but I'm mostly able to remember if I've said something previously. It's hard to get up and make food, and after eating pizza that seemed to trigger my head pressure, I'm afraid to eat anything non-inflammatory. But making healthy food is so difficult when I don't have any income and my parents are who I rely on for food. I'd like to do meal prep so I don't have to worry about struggling to cook, but can't even afford that either. I'm limited to what my parents can buy, and they're feeding my sister in her 40's who had to move back in now as well. I just realized I had typed "Trying to eat anti-inflammatory foods but I'm limited to what my parents can buy, and they're feeding my sister in her 40's who had to move back in now as well." and forgot about it. Welp.

Motivation to do anything is dwindling, still trying to talk to my friends as much as I can as they help cheer me up and feel less lonely right now. Been trying to force myself to do things even if it reminds me of how I feel so dull and lifeless compared to back in March.

I'm also exhausted all the time which doesn't help. I have the moderate sleep apnea, but I've lost 10lbs (190 to 180, I'm 5'7") from not eating much/forgetting to eat, so that might be a blessing in disguise. I won't be able to do the at home sleep test still until July to attempt to get my insurance to give me a CPAP again. And my neuro appointment is still June 7th. Three weeks feels like forever. I'm terrified I'm going to be dismissed by my new neuro and I'm even more terrified of finding out I have some kind of dementia this young. I've had issues for a while with my PCOS, endometriosis, dental issues from having a small mouth, getting shingles at 21(which never popped back up), the head pressure in that small spot on the back of my head back then popping up before or after the shingles. I don't know if being born two months early would of done anything either, I was healthy as far as I know.

I'm losing my mind and I hate that nobody in my family is advocating for me.