Hi all. It's been a while since I've posted but I'm pleased to say it's because everything's been going so well. Up until today, that is.
My mum met Frank 14 years ago. Frank sold his house a few years after they met and they lived together as 'husband and wife' for a couple of years until he eventually bought another place of his own. My mum stayed there the majority of the time but maintained her own home. They didn't do well living together 24/7 and had a turbulent relationship hence the reason he bought another house and she kept hers.
He played a big part in looking after her when her dementia started getting worse and when she moved into the care home he continued to take her out on a twice weekly basis. Sadly due to his own poor health (heart failure) he had to drop this down to once a week. The home tells me she often asks if he is due to visit that day and that her face lights up when he arrives.
I found out today that he's died. I don't know whether we should tell Mum or not. It will break her heart. She doesn't really mention him when she's with me and she never has any recollection of him taking her out. If we tell her she will forget almost immediately which means having to tell her all over again. It seems cruel.
Any advice would be much appreciated.
Thanks in advance.
My mum met Frank 14 years ago. Frank sold his house a few years after they met and they lived together as 'husband and wife' for a couple of years until he eventually bought another place of his own. My mum stayed there the majority of the time but maintained her own home. They didn't do well living together 24/7 and had a turbulent relationship hence the reason he bought another house and she kept hers.
He played a big part in looking after her when her dementia started getting worse and when she moved into the care home he continued to take her out on a twice weekly basis. Sadly due to his own poor health (heart failure) he had to drop this down to once a week. The home tells me she often asks if he is due to visit that day and that her face lights up when he arrives.
I found out today that he's died. I don't know whether we should tell Mum or not. It will break her heart. She doesn't really mention him when she's with me and she never has any recollection of him taking her out. If we tell her she will forget almost immediately which means having to tell her all over again. It seems cruel.
Any advice would be much appreciated.
Thanks in advance.