It's official: AD, rapidly advancing...

[grumpycat]

Hi everyone!

In the spring we were told by a neurologist that my dad "likely has Alzheimer's Disease". We've been waiting for brain scan results all summer to give us some real information, as further mental testing was inconclusive.

Now the MRI results have come back and they don't lie: it's dementia. The neuro also said his mental functioning has clearly worsened since the (first) appointment only 4 months ago! So it seems to be rapidly advancing.

He was immediately put on sick leave, and won't be able to drive or work any longer. It's heart breaking. He is just 55...

Dad doesn't see that he has serious enough cognitive problems as to warrant not being allowed to work and drive anymore, and is shocked and sad of course. He is in the early stages, with smallish issues like finding it hard to do multi step things independently, not thinking logically, withdrawing socially, and of course some memory lapses.

I am coping alright at the moment but that may be because I feel like I can't fall apart right now, again. I had my first shock this spring when I first saw dad's symptoms, but now I've got my boyfriend's wellbeing to think of also, as his father is dying in a matter of months. It's not as bad as many other people have it, but for me it's quite a plateful of worries at the ripe age of 28, hahah.

When I first joined here I soon stopped posting because we were just waiting for confirmation about dads condition and I had no news at all. Now we have it so I'm back here nice to be back, this place is wonderful.

 

[1954]

Grumpycat

I am so sorry to hear about your dad and such a young age. It is so much to take in and with your boy friends father as well

I know you will get lots of support on this site

Very difficult for your father, he must scared and bewildered with all that is going on

Please keep posting we are here for you x

 

[Izzy]

I'm so sorry to learn of your dad's diagnosis at such a young age. I'm glad you've come back to TP. x

 

[jeany123]

I'm sorry about your dad and your boyfriends dad you are having a rough time at the moment and Talking Point will be here for you,,

Best wishes Jeany xl

 

[stanleypj]

This is an awful situation, especially for someone so young. If life were fair, you would be able to concentrate on making the most of all life has to offer you at the stage you are at.

There is always hope that things may not be quite as bad as you are led to believe. MRI scans cannot actually lie but they do need to be interpreted. Different experts do have different views of the implications of the same scan. Similarly, you've been told that his mental functioning has clearly worsened in four months. This judgement is probably based on a one-off performance in a test that is not particularly reliable. And when he took it he may well have been affected by the 'result' of the MRI scan.

I'm not, of course, suggesting that he doesn't have a serious problem. But there is still a lot to learn about exactly what is wrong and, since everyone is different, the way that the condition will progress is hard to predict.

Have you been told what kind of AD you dad 'likely has'? (He seems, BTW, to have a rather unusual neurologist who actually has the good sense to qualify his judgement.) As you probably know, the vast majority of young onset AD runs in the family. Did any of his family have AD? You have to be extraordinarily unlucky, like my wife, to get young onset AD otherwise.

So don't lose all hope and, most importantly, don't let your dad. If you are devastated, think how he must feel. I read recently, and it's stayed with me, 'there is no such thing as false hope, only hope'.

Keep coming back here. You will learn so much as we have all done. Perhaps your dad could come here as well?

Take care

 

[sparkle5]

with you xx

Dear friend,
I am also 28 and completely heart broken. My dad has AD and his mum had dementia. I am also new, and not sure how to cope..

My mum is in denial and does get very cross with my dad. They argue occasionally about the little things he does wrong and she is very impatient when he tries to string his sentence together. He is more calm without my mum around, but I believe she will cope as time goes on, it hurts and angers me but I can only give her gentle thoughts to be more patient when I know she is suffering more than all of us knowing her life is changing and she will become the carer in the future...

Its good to know there are people out there also going through this, I think im still in shock and from the brief hour I have joined this site have also noticed my dad seems to be fairly okay compared to lots of other people and my heart goes out to you and everyone else on here.

I know my post is pretty irrelevant but I thought I would say hi and welcome to you also x

 

[Bubsho]

You girls are amazing! 28 is soooo young! I'm 41 and I'm finding it hard too, my Dad was diagnosed in October 2013 but I knew something was wrong in January 2013 when he came out of a General Anaesthetic and something was radically wrong with his cognitive function, he hasn't been the same since, we found out that the anaesthetic had fast forwarded the AZ and I spent most of last year convinced of this and was sadly confirmed in Oct. I am still angry that a proper pre op assessment wasn't carried out on my Father and I am looking at ways to make sure this doesn't happen to anyone else, although the AZ would have manifested anyway it would have been gradual and not as fast as it has. My Dad is a different person and is very clingy to my Mum so now my mum gets no respite at all! what I am learning through all this is that it's ok to be angry if it helps but not if it makes me miserable, I have to find the joy in everything I do and become absolutely happy! my dad is good although his recall memory is totally shot to pieces! Feeling so helpless living so far away I do what I can, my work has given me one day a month off so I can travel the five hours so I can give my Mum a complete day off from caring for my Dad, and I make sure I look after myself too, I've reconnected with my love for Ballet and attend a ballet class once a week which I love, anyway my point i wanted to make is that please look after yourselves, you are immensely precious and don't keep your struggle to yourselves. Xxxx