Again many thanks to all for your sympathies
Thank you for your observations and they are possibly bourne out by the fact that she still asks each day 'if we can do anything to help' him, I am sticking to my guns for now and telling her the truth and have even a couple times, when she seems closest to understanding, suggested that we go visit him, so's she can see, as she has also asked 'how do they know its him' or 'they say he's died', but she seems reticent and not sure she wants to do this... The Cremation is in a week so we still have time.
The assesment by the older persons social services has been in hand for some time now as we got involved with them when Father sufffered a UTI, and all it's related mental confusion, at the beginning of Dec '11.