Lovely Evening

[EES]

Went back to work yesterday after 2 weeks off - mum was still sleeping when I left so I didn't wake her - I was a little concerned she would worry where I was when she woke so left a her nice note explaining i had gone back to work - my sister visited in the afternoon and found her in a really good mood - a little confused and kept asking for her parents again but was happy to know i had a job despite me working 2 days a week for the past 3 years... when i arrived home she had the biggest smile on her face and asked where i had been - i explained I had gone back to work and she said how happy she was that i'd found a job - i make the most of these times because usually she thinks i have gone out to enjoy myself without her... anyway, later that eveing we were watching tv and she turned to me and said shall we get married (I'm her daughter) I didn't know know how to respond because this was a whole new thing to me - so I just said of course ketys talk about it tomorrow which made her happy - she then said do you need to talk to your mum first - I just said no because she was the most important person in my life - "that really made her smile" its moments like this I really make the most of - the sad part is her not knowing she is my mum x

 

[christine_batch]

Hi Ees,

It is so hard to know how to answer some of their questions but I think you handled that very well.

Your Mother may have forgotten all about it. It is the illness but it still does not help with the emotions that it puts on the Carer.

Have you thought about putting things into a daily diary ? I did and it really helped me.

Take care of yourself.

Christine

 

[EES]

Thank you for your response Christine - I will give the diary a try and see how things go - its good to hear it helped you and I hope it helps other carers too. But what a differnce a day makes - on my return from work yesterday my sister was here with mum and said she spent the afternoon consoling mum because she was crying out for her mum and dad... I took over the care from there and spent the whole evening and night trying to prevent her leaving the house to find her parents.. she got very aggresive at times and was lashing out at me... my mum has never laid a finger on me or any of my sblings in our lives... at 2am this morning I eventually broke down and shouted - it seemed to shock her in to realisation and she huged me... I then felt very guilty for shouting. I was in floods of tears and sat in front of the front door with my head in my hands... she continued to ask of her parents whereabouts and said she wanted to go home to her mum and dad and I should go to my parents home too - I can't count the times i tried to explain this was our home - she just stared at me as if i was mad... eventually at 3am - this morning I thought she would forget but NO she is still saying she wants her mum and I should get out of the house - my sister will be up this afternoon to take over while I go and meet a frined for some respite over a cocktail or 2 - but I'm already anxious it will all start again tonight - so no cocktails for me this afternoon i need to keep myself alert to take care of things here... sorry to ramble on but sharing my worries with others in the same situations provided me with some comfort... x

 

[DeborahBlythe]

EES, I'm really sorry to hear that things have swung round the other way. Do you think it's possible that your mum has a urinary tract infection? They can play havoc with people and produce some alarming problems, a bit like those you have described, but can be treated effectively with antibiotics. I wonder if it would be worth getting a doc out to check your mum over and test her urine.
Kind regards Deborah x