I need support

[TinaT]

Thanks Winnie,grove,T face,JPG, Gerum,G.G,Jimbo,C Joanne,danny for wishing me good luck yesterday and today. I really really appreciate all of you and all the others too many to mention who have supported me over the last week.

I've spent all day today printing off stuff for my day at the supermarket tommorow - ***** printer keeps going wrong and I have to unplug everything, wait a few minutes, plug it all back in and hope it will start to work again. Sometimes it does, sometimes it doesn't but it is frustrating and taking up masses of time.

I did find time this afternoon to visit Ken. I had to talk to a few relatives and staff and give out some more petitions and could see him getting more and more agitated because I wasn't giving him 'quality time'. I decided that if we went into the smoke room, we would be alone and I could give him my undivided attention. Getting him into the wheelchair to take him to the other room was dreadful. He fought both myself and Matthew, a lovely care worker who is Indian, and used language which I have never heard from him before. I was shocked both by the language and by the fact that he actually uttered words which I could recognise as speech! Whether I should have or not, I thoroughly told him off for this. He told me to 'shut up'. The first intelligent words I've heard in a long time but which I really enjoyed hearing.

I pushed him round and round the garden talking to him and leaning over to kiss him and he slowly calmed down. It started to rain so we had to come indoors to the smoke room. Just as I was lulling him into a well needed sleep two other relatives came in with their resident. Ken was up and agitated all over again!

I manged to leave quietly whilst the care workers were taking him to be changed. Hopefully this agitation will have tired him out and he will be asleep now for a while after his tea and exhausting afternoon.

I won't be seeing him tomorrow as I'm off to a supermarket to collect signatures.

xxTinaT

 

[Skye]

Tina, you are an amazing woman! You achieve more in a day than I do in a week!

Good luck with the signature collection tomorrow. I hope you have somewhere out of the rain.

Love,

 

[jimbo 111]

------------" Whether I should have or not, I thoroughly told him off for this. He told me to 'shut up'. The first intelligent words I've heard in a long time but which I really enjoyed hearing."

xxTinaT

Hello Tina
Wishing you all the best for tomorrow
Ref your quote above, I love your Ken isn't it wonderful when some one who is so restricted , can suddenly 'light up' and respond to your tone of voice .
Maybe not the correct thing to say but 'Good on you Ken '
Don't wear yourself out
jimbo 111

 

[Nan2seven]

Dear Tina,
Have only just caught up with your thread.
All power to your elbow.
Hope you get masses of signatures and support tomorrow.
Love,
Nan XXX

 

[TinaT]

Thank Nan for supporting me at asuch a very difficult and sad time for yourself. This is very much appreciated.

A very good friend who is well up on care issues came with me to Asda to get signatures for the petition. It is the nearest Asda to where Ken's care home is.

In an hour and a half, we had 521 signatures and the manager asked us to leave as we were blocking the 'footfall' of his customers. At one point I have to agree we were as people were queuing up to sign! We managed to eek out another half an hour but reluctantly had to leave. I think on the next little market day this suberb has, I will chance my arm and just stand on the street asking for signatures.

I do think people are upset and angry about the cuts which local authorities are forced into making, but they do not have an easy access to how to show this. I think my little petition today proved this to me beyond doubt.

The frustration of ordinary people was extraordinary and I think my campaign gave them an outlet for this. I've 3,000 signatures to go and I will have reached my goal. The law brought int legislation last year states that there has to be a full council meeting with one representative of the petition allowed to speak to the full council if I can get 4,000 signatures.

xxTinaT

xxTinaT

 

[Canadian Joanne]

Tina,
That's absolutely fantastic. I feel confident that you will get the 4,000 signatures you need.

 

[Tender Face]

You want to watch your reputation, lady! Being asked to leave the premises, indeed!

Seriously, you are making a 4,000 target look like child’s play! And yes, I absolutely agree you are tapping into a groundswell of public concern about cuts affecting the most vulnerable, even where it may not directly affect those supporting you. I can see you becoming a national 'flagship'! Well done, missus!!!!!

Love to you and Ken, Karen, x

 

[TinaT]

Hi Joanne & TF,

Feeling a bit deflated and I'm wondering if the other Asda store I've got permission for will get wind of this and tell me I can't come. Looking back I think if I'd been the store manager I would have done the same. I'm wavering tonight and feeling a bit overwhelmed by it all.

xxTinaT

 

[Skye]

Tina, I'm not surprised you're wavering, you must be exhausted chuck.

Disappointing that you had to move, but it just shows how much enthusiasm there is for your petition. I know you'll carry on, when you've had a rest, you're too determined to do anything else.

Once again, huge admiration, and love to you and Ken.

 

[Winnie Kjaer]

Just to spur you on

Tina you are bound to feeling a bit deflated, you have been so hyper to get ready for today have talked your face off and then been sent home. Tomorrow you will laugh at that and be rearing to go again. The other ASDA manager will not tell you to stay away, he may tell you at the most which times are the better ones for the store in which case you could set up a bit further away if the weather allows this during peak time.

I too know you will get your goal and be able to speak at the meeting. You will open their eyes and make them sit up and take note. Almost everyone these days iare touched by dementia one way or another, heaven forbid but they may all be in that meeting who knows.

Take a deep breath and start again when you are ready. Good luck. x

 

[TinaT]

I think you are both right - I'm feeling pretty tired & headachy tonight.

Had to laugh the other day when a friend said that I would need throat sweets after all the talking I had to do at the supermarkets. 'Been a teacher all those years ' I replied, 'I'm used to it'. Besides which, once I get on my soap box even a sore throat wouldn't stop me.

Opinionated, that's me - often to my regret.

xxTinaT

 

[Tender Face]

Tina – this is no ‘ordinary’ campaign. This is full of emotion about you fighting directly for Ken’s care. That it might help so many others is almost ‘incidental’ (although it won’t be to them). No wonder you feel shattered – it’s full of emotion you are probably suppressing in the whirlwind of organising everything ... I know myself it’s easy to get swept along in the ‘doing’ until those emotions come flooding over .....

Now, may I suggest .... extra bubbles in the bath and a large dose of Tia Maria (strictly medicinal of course! – blow the cough sweets!!!!) If you are marched out of supermarket foyers, there are always the trolley shelters to lurk in!

Big hugs, get those feet up and that voice rested! You are going to need it in fine fettle for the council meeting! Ken would be sooooooooooo proud of you, if only he could understand how you are still loving him and fighting for him in whatever way you can now.

Love, Karen, x

 

[grove]

Hello Tina , WELL DONE YOU getting all the Names on the Petition , have you thought any more about my idea ? PLEASE SEE BELOW :



* Contacting Women's Church Groups etc etc


* In your area where Ken 's Home is & am sure you could
" Drum up some Support " from the Member's & at the same time sign the PETITION


Love , Support & Prayer 's to you & Ken

Good Luck at ASDA !


Take Care & rest & eat when you can to keep the Head Ache away ! !


Love Grove x x

 

[TinaT]

Thanks TF, as ever you have hit the emotional side square on. I have a pic of Ken on one of the boards I use as promotion with the slogan 'Save our Care Homes' on it and that keeps me going.

Grove, I'm very lucky in that there is a wonderful church group who come every week to visit the home and they are fully supportive. I've also got a friend who is a retired vicar but he does 'stand in' for other vicars too and he has taken a fistful of petitions.

I've not got round to the local dementia groups, Tom is a stalwart of one of them and I know they will also help.

The staff at the care home also have a small stack to use up. When all of these come in it will be a great help.

xxTinaT

 

[willsar]

Hi

Only just caught up on your posts. At the risk of sounding sugary sweet, You are amazing with what you are doing. Ken is so lucky to have you fighting for him, but its not just him you are fighting for it is for everyone in his home and other homes. Hope the Tia Maria was large and enjoyed. Take care. Willsar X

 

[TinaT]

Thanks Wilsar - I needed something 'sugary' today. Been having the 'wobbles' yesterday evening and this morning ie., What am I doing? Am I doing it all wrong? What if I'm making such fuss and it all comes to nothing? Am I imposing my will on others?

I had an e mail Friday night from the Director of Social Services inviting me to a meeting with himself and the 'executive' councillor leading the review. I've decided whether they like it or not, I'm not going alone to be 'whitewashed'. Another care home relative is coming with me, a good friend who is well up on social health issues, and son Matthew is trying to change his day off and travel all the way down from Carlisle to come also. A wonderful person here on TP has offered to help on Wednesday at the next supermarket venue and also come to the meeting if I need her.

I spoke to some relatives I met in the care home this afternoon and, together with the relatives I've spoken to in the last week or so, I'm speaking for about ten relatives.

All the above has given me the courage to keep going. I'm very blessed to now have such people giving me their support.

xxTinaT

 

[Jo1958]

Tina, hi
You are doing really well, when the wobbles come it's usually because you are moving on the another phase and you certainly are. It's fantastic that you have some good support now and that meetings are being arranged.
I do hope that it's a good, positive and successful meeting, I look forward to hearing how it goes, whitewashing - No.
With best wishes from Jo

 

[Tender Face]

The sad but perhaps almost inevitable news today about Southern Cross will only add weight to public concern about LA - or any - home closures.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-14102750

I wondered if you had seen this quote, Tina: David Rogers, chairman of the Local Government Association's Community Wellbeing Board, said: "Councils take the welfare of care home residents extremely seriously and throughout this process that has always been their priority."

An awful lot of people in parallel worlds, Tina, who will perhaps more fully understand your distress and concern for Ken (let alone the anxiety being caused for yourself).

The national media coverage this latest news is bound to have is only going to increase the groundswell of support for you from people ‘on the street’ who might not otherwise understand the anxiety and distress the potential closures cause, be they private or LA run. Bittersweet. But this ‘tragedy’ is going to raise awareness of need.

My heart goes out to all those affected by this latest news. Hope you are resting up a little, Tina.

Love, Karen, x

 

[TinaT]

Yes TF, I was heartsick when I heard the news about Southern Cross. They are promising that residents will not have to move, that staff will continue to get paid, that the 'Landlords' would take over the running of the care homes. Some of the 'Landlords' already run care homes, so I heard on the radio. Other landlords such as the holding company investing for the shiek of arabic - - I wonder what will be uppermost in their minds, the rent they are owing or the welfare of the frail and elderly now in their care?

I heard a son talking about his 85 year old mother suffering from dementia in one of the Southern Cross homes. He said that the only news he has is from the radio and tv and that relatives are being left completely in the dark, worried and concerned for their relatives.

Just awful

xxTinaT

 

[grove]

Hello Tina , Just been "catching up " on your Thread , "your Post 96 " ( today ) sounds very Postive & yes Never Go Alone to S Services / Council Meetings all ways go " Mob Hanned " Tina much better at " Fighting the System " as it were you or your Friend ought to have Pen & Note Book in Hand , that way you will not for get what was said by whom etc ! ! . Sorry if this sounds am "Telling you what to do " just bit of friendly Advice that's all

Many years back read a Article " How to Win / Comuntiy Action " that was not the name but you get the idea ............... It said Have all the Facts to hand , write to every body who would Support You etc etc & another thing Tina sorry to Nag etc . Do you think you ought to have a "ACTION GROUP "? Set up that way you can spread the "Work load " Please if its a BAD IDEA do say / ignore ME !

Love & Support for your Meeting & for the Petition Signing , good to have Support from your T P Friend

Love & Hugs Love Grove x