Hi everyone,I feel like I sort of know you all as I have been on this site and reading peoples blogs for best part of a year but never had the guts to reigister and write something.
Where do I begin (bet thats been said a few times),
My Father has Vascular Dementia! he was diagnosed about two years ago. It all began one day on a train, it was July and the weather was particulaly hot and even though he was sitting down he had a "fainting spell" but recovered and managed with my mothers help to get home....shortly after this on a Sunday morning he had an epiletic fit. We were all gobsmacked as he had never suffered from epilepsy before, but at the hospital they reassured us he was fine and referred him to a first fit clinic, that appointment never materialised and as we thought it was a one off never pursued it and life returned to normal.
Two months went past, and again on a Sunday morning my father had a batch of epileptic fits, four in total and was admitted to hospital. This time a battery of tests were carried out as he took so long to come round and when he did was disorientated, and confused. The doctors gave him a through going over including a CT scan, we were then told that at some point over the previous year that he had, had a stroke (that day on the train who knows) and he now has vascular dementia....what a shock that was, oh and to top it off was a fully fledge epileptic.
My Father was sent home with medication for his epilepsy but nothing for the dementia and for a while we kidded ourselves that the doc's had got it wrong as he was showing no outward signs of memeory loss but he was always a man of few words anyway, although my Mum did say that she would catch him in a world of his own on occasions.
Now this story goes in batchs of two months because exactly two months later my Father had another four fits one after the other again on a Sunday morning (we wondered about this Sunday morning thing and realised he liked a couple of gin and tonics on a Saturday night, was this the trigger we will never know). He was rushed to hospital, and was put on life support as he was in a bad way and need intensive care which was provided nowhere near where we lived but that didn't matter, the care he got was second to none. My Father came round very slowly it took about 10 days, he was in hospital about three weeks in total then released into a rehab hospital near to where we live where he stayed for two months.
We were now under no illusion on what his condition was now, and could kid ourselves no longer......the upheaval for my Mother was immense, she had to leave the family home and move into sheltered accomodation in a different area, she was never a very happy women but this sent her over the edge and she felt very resentful towards my Father, but loved the attention that the family and carers gave to her when he came home, but that was all short lived. My Father has a private pension so therefore had to pay for any carers that the social services put in place, my Mother soon put paid to that, she couldn't understand why it wasn't free, so she made their lives a misery even phoning the police on one occasion when one of the carers turned up late! She then decided she was going to go it alone and went against everybodys advice (you need to bare in mind my Mum was Eighty at the time and my Dad Seventy Eight and my Mum being under five foot and tiny and my Dad being six foot and over fifteen stone. My Dad has always suffered with an arthritic knee and this soon became a real problem with his mobility, as the dementia was telling him that he couldn't walk, so it was not unusual to get phone calls in the middle of the night, when on his way to the toilet he had froze and one of us would have to drive round and unfreeze him.
Things came to a head about four weeks ago when we realised that the funny smell in my Mums house was my Dad, she thought washing the bits you could see would surfice! We had been badgering the GP to come out for weeks as we felt he was declining both mentally and physically, but the GP kept saying he was fine and Mum was doing a great job, we eventually got him to get a physio out about his knee, she took one look at him and got him addmitted to a rehab hospital where he has been for about four weeks, his condition deteriotating before our eyes.
I am so sorry this was going to be a short blog just to outline past history and has turned into a rant. The hospital yesterday told us he has to go into a care home which we always knew was a possibility but then comes the body blow, Social Services have now told us today that they might send him home with a large care package? What does that mean......will they stay the night in a one bedroom flat and look after him when he gets up five or six time wandering? We are all at our wits end, and my Mother isnt helping by shouting at everyone and generally being nasty, her memory isn't the best so a lot of the time its in one ear and out the other.
Nobody has to reply to this rant as I am quite embarassed that I have written it, if I am brave enough I will give you an update..
Take care all x
Where do I begin (bet thats been said a few times),
My Father has Vascular Dementia! he was diagnosed about two years ago. It all began one day on a train, it was July and the weather was particulaly hot and even though he was sitting down he had a "fainting spell" but recovered and managed with my mothers help to get home....shortly after this on a Sunday morning he had an epiletic fit. We were all gobsmacked as he had never suffered from epilepsy before, but at the hospital they reassured us he was fine and referred him to a first fit clinic, that appointment never materialised and as we thought it was a one off never pursued it and life returned to normal.
Two months went past, and again on a Sunday morning my father had a batch of epileptic fits, four in total and was admitted to hospital. This time a battery of tests were carried out as he took so long to come round and when he did was disorientated, and confused. The doctors gave him a through going over including a CT scan, we were then told that at some point over the previous year that he had, had a stroke (that day on the train who knows) and he now has vascular dementia....what a shock that was, oh and to top it off was a fully fledge epileptic.
My Father was sent home with medication for his epilepsy but nothing for the dementia and for a while we kidded ourselves that the doc's had got it wrong as he was showing no outward signs of memeory loss but he was always a man of few words anyway, although my Mum did say that she would catch him in a world of his own on occasions.
Now this story goes in batchs of two months because exactly two months later my Father had another four fits one after the other again on a Sunday morning (we wondered about this Sunday morning thing and realised he liked a couple of gin and tonics on a Saturday night, was this the trigger we will never know). He was rushed to hospital, and was put on life support as he was in a bad way and need intensive care which was provided nowhere near where we lived but that didn't matter, the care he got was second to none. My Father came round very slowly it took about 10 days, he was in hospital about three weeks in total then released into a rehab hospital near to where we live where he stayed for two months.
We were now under no illusion on what his condition was now, and could kid ourselves no longer......the upheaval for my Mother was immense, she had to leave the family home and move into sheltered accomodation in a different area, she was never a very happy women but this sent her over the edge and she felt very resentful towards my Father, but loved the attention that the family and carers gave to her when he came home, but that was all short lived. My Father has a private pension so therefore had to pay for any carers that the social services put in place, my Mother soon put paid to that, she couldn't understand why it wasn't free, so she made their lives a misery even phoning the police on one occasion when one of the carers turned up late! She then decided she was going to go it alone and went against everybodys advice (you need to bare in mind my Mum was Eighty at the time and my Dad Seventy Eight and my Mum being under five foot and tiny and my Dad being six foot and over fifteen stone. My Dad has always suffered with an arthritic knee and this soon became a real problem with his mobility, as the dementia was telling him that he couldn't walk, so it was not unusual to get phone calls in the middle of the night, when on his way to the toilet he had froze and one of us would have to drive round and unfreeze him.
Things came to a head about four weeks ago when we realised that the funny smell in my Mums house was my Dad, she thought washing the bits you could see would surfice! We had been badgering the GP to come out for weeks as we felt he was declining both mentally and physically, but the GP kept saying he was fine and Mum was doing a great job, we eventually got him to get a physio out about his knee, she took one look at him and got him addmitted to a rehab hospital where he has been for about four weeks, his condition deteriotating before our eyes.
I am so sorry this was going to be a short blog just to outline past history and has turned into a rant. The hospital yesterday told us he has to go into a care home which we always knew was a possibility but then comes the body blow, Social Services have now told us today that they might send him home with a large care package? What does that mean......will they stay the night in a one bedroom flat and look after him when he gets up five or six time wandering? We are all at our wits end, and my Mother isnt helping by shouting at everyone and generally being nasty, her memory isn't the best so a lot of the time its in one ear and out the other.
Nobody has to reply to this rant as I am quite embarassed that I have written it, if I am brave enough I will give you an update..
Take care all x
