Hi all, my mother has Alzheimer's. She was diagnosed two years ago but was showing signs for a long while before that. She is in her mid sixties and is otherwise very healthy and robust. Things were really hard at first but we have learned gradually how to handle the challenges, and lately she seems pretty happy and relaxed (most of the time).
An issue we are struggle to resolve relates to her continence when out and about. She is fine using the toilet etc at home (although encouraging her to shower can be tricky). When out and about in urban areas it is generally easy enough to find one she can use. But the problem we are having happens in parks and rural areas. We always try to use the loos whenever we see one, or ask her if she needs to go, or I go and ask if she wants to come with me. But she gets very sudden and extremely urgent call of nature at the most inconvenient moments on our walks, usually in an open space with no bushes to hide in, and with people around. On several occasions this has led her to just pull down her pants and urinate in public, while I try to hide her with my coat. Obviously this is pretty uncomfortable and I don't want strangers to see my mum like that. She also doesn't really squat properly so it usually goes all down her legs etc. A couple of times she has also soiled herself on walks.
These incidents are pretty upsetting to everyone involved, but especially to her. It is really difficult to try to balance protecting her privacy and pride and dignity with the need to also ensure her hygiene and health. It is also incredibly stressful to go from leisurely walk to sudden dire emergency and seeing her panicking like that is very difficult. We tried incontinence pads last year but she baulked somewhat at the idea, understandably. I've also suggested seeing her GP would help but she doesn't think there is really a problem. Has anyone had any similar issues or does anyone have any advice or tips for how we can handle this better and help her?
An issue we are struggle to resolve relates to her continence when out and about. She is fine using the toilet etc at home (although encouraging her to shower can be tricky). When out and about in urban areas it is generally easy enough to find one she can use. But the problem we are having happens in parks and rural areas. We always try to use the loos whenever we see one, or ask her if she needs to go, or I go and ask if she wants to come with me. But she gets very sudden and extremely urgent call of nature at the most inconvenient moments on our walks, usually in an open space with no bushes to hide in, and with people around. On several occasions this has led her to just pull down her pants and urinate in public, while I try to hide her with my coat. Obviously this is pretty uncomfortable and I don't want strangers to see my mum like that. She also doesn't really squat properly so it usually goes all down her legs etc. A couple of times she has also soiled herself on walks.
These incidents are pretty upsetting to everyone involved, but especially to her. It is really difficult to try to balance protecting her privacy and pride and dignity with the need to also ensure her hygiene and health. It is also incredibly stressful to go from leisurely walk to sudden dire emergency and seeing her panicking like that is very difficult. We tried incontinence pads last year but she baulked somewhat at the idea, understandably. I've also suggested seeing her GP would help but she doesn't think there is really a problem. Has anyone had any similar issues or does anyone have any advice or tips for how we can handle this better and help her?