POA

[Kay111]

I've just found out that mum never got POA for dad's medical/finances etc. I thought she had last year but she never got round to it (!). She has a joint account so has just been dealing with finances herself.

We were hoping to find somewhere to take dad for a couple of weeks so mum can have a break and settle here - she's desperately in need of one - but I've just suddenly thought, will they not take him if she has no POA?

 

[Kevinl]

I don't have a POA for my wife and she's been in a nursing home for over 3 years, I'm set there now waiting for lunch to arrive so I can feed her, she was in the home for nearly a year before her DOLS came through.
K

 

[Louise7]

Providing they get paid care homes won't worry about whether your Mum has financial POA or not. The contract may ask if anyone has POA for your Dad, and ask how the fees will be paid, but ithe absence of a POA wouldn't prevent him going in for a few weeks respite. It's a good idea for your Mum to get POA"s in place as soon as she can though.

 

[Kay111]

My heart just stopped when she said she'd never got round to it! We were talking about it back in April and she'd even had an appointment to see a solicitor!

I wonder if it's too late to set up a POA by ourselves because of mental capacity? I mean, if you asked dad if mum could be given authority to deal with his finances and health he would say she does anyway! And if you pressed him on who he would most want to have authority he would say mum without skipping a heartbeat.

 

[nae sporran]

We did it without a solicitor, just asked AgeUK for advice on what parts were relevant and for the difference between joint and severally or joint or single attorney. We also had it all witnessed and C certified as having capacity by her chiropodist who had known her for about 4 years at that point.
So long as the rest of your family would have no objection to your mum taking on POA then I doubt there would be a problem with it, Kay. That is the impression I got and thankfully C's children accepted me as single POA.

 

[Banjomansmate]

You can have both you and your Mum as Attorneys if your Dad is happy with that. It would probably be a good thing to get her to donate PoA to you too then they are ready to use if needed in the future.

 

[Kay111]

Thank you everyone - @Kevinl @Louise7 @nae sporran @Banjomansmate . Every day feels like one panic after another at the moment!

I'm the only other immediate family member dad has other than mum, and have zero objection to mum having poa haha. I'm actually panicked that she doesnt!

Yes, good shout about getting POA for mum too. (In fact, tempted just to get POAs for me and the other half for each other!)

 

[arielsmelody]

As well as getting power of attorney, this might be a good time to sit down with your mum and work out where things stand with their savings etc, so that you can look into getting their finances separated, which would make things easier if eventually he has to go into a care home full time and needs a financial assessment from the local authority.

 

[Kay111]

@arielsmelody yes, that definitely needs to get done too. Funny how poor dad is just quietly sitting in his chair - all he needs is sleep and food and personal care now and again but there's so much admin and planning and sorting stuff out behind the scenes.