Getting worse or is it just me?

[Sammie234]

Hi all, it seems ages since I was last in here but have been busy supporting daughter lately and just haven’t had the time. She has now been diagnosed with over active thyroid due to Graves disease and is currently receiving medication.Have finally gone in and taken POA to the bank for registration dear me it took ages to get done. Asked if he still had competency I said yes then said about how bad his short term memory was, he forgets within half an hour or even less now so she said I don’t think if he forgets that quickly that he has got competency. So I have charge of everything now. I didn’t want to put it in but better now I suppose just in case. His repitition is getting awful now and asking me the same questions over and over is driving me round the bend. We watch ITV3 or Gold all the time now if au see another episode of Poiret one more time I’ll go nuts, then he wonders why Im on my phone tapping away, it’s the only way not to scream. His appetite is all awry now as well, one minute he wants something to eat another day we can end up eating justvrubbish snacks it hardly seems the effort of cooking a proper meal because now he quite often gets half way through and says he has enough. The worst thing happened recently as well. He was outside with the dog when someone went past and wasn’t quick enough the dog must have felt threatened or was over protective with OH and ended up nipping this person. Nasty bruise but barely broke the skin. We got reported to the police and have to keep him muzzled when out of the yard. I can cope with that the dog is 11 now but having to remind OH every time why the dog has to be muzzled every time he is out is distressing for all concerned because obviously OH has completely forgotten what happened! Sorry for the long rant just a bit down I think. Anyway back to the grindstone goodnight .

 

[canary]

Hi @Sammie234 good to hear from you again. Im glad your daughter is now receiving medication for her graves disease - she should soon be feeling better. Never worry about having a rant on here.

Its horrible when something happens to really bring it home to you that there has been progression; registering POA at the bank was necessary, but still hard to do - you want to keep telling yourself that hes really not that bad. Im not sure what to suggest about the dog, Id only say avoid long complicated explanations that your husband doesnt understand. Would it work if you simply said the police told you to do it without further explanations?

 

[maryjoan]

Just a bit of a thought here - with bank branches closing down - mine did last week - how does one get to do some of the stuff like registering PoA, which used to be face to face? We live in the countryside, no car, infrequent bus service between just 2 towns -neither with branches of my bank..... life is going backwards not forwards

 

[Sammie234]

Hi @Sammie234 good to hear from you again. Im glad your daughter is now receiving medication for her graves disease - she should soon be feeling better. Never worry about having a rant on here.

Its horrible when something happens to really bring it home to you that there has been progression; registering POA at the bank was necessary, but still hard to do - you want to keep telling yourself that hes really not that bad. Im not sure what to suggest about the dog, Id only say avoid long complicated explanations that your husband doesnt understand. Would it work if you simply said the police told you to do it without further explanations?

Thanks for the reply I’ve already told him about the police but then he forgets about putting the muzzle on the dog then so have to remind him all over again I’ve even put it in a white board for him but it’s not working , I’ve taken over a lot of the dog walking but feel he has so little to keep him occupied that I’m taking away anything he can do , it’s so frustrating.

 

[Sammie234]

Just a bit of a thought here - with bank branches closing down - mine did last week - how does one get to do some of the stuff like registering PoA, which used to be face to face? We live in the countryside, no car, infrequent bus service between just 2 towns -neither with branches of my bank..... life is going backwards not forwards

Like you we have no car and live in the countryside but we do have buses one an hour so can get to local towns one town is devoid of banks but the other one has several and luckily ours is one of them because a POA isn’t possible to do online as far as I’m aware, I had to make an appt and then it took an hour to deal with. I’m capable in dealing online but I feel for those who can’t it’s not fair on them there should be one branch at least for use of !

 

[canary]

Thanks for the reply I’ve already told him about the police but then he forgets about putting the muzzle on the dog then so have to remind him all over again I’ve even put it in a white board for him but it’s not working , I’ve taken over a lot of the dog walking but feel he has so little to keep him occupied that I’m taking away anything he can do , it’s so frustrating.

A white board doesnt work for me either.

I just get used to saying the same thing each time - no good saying "but I told you" or similar, so I cut it down to a short instruction - if its too long he cant remember and doesnt understand what Im saying. You might find you have to put the muzzle on the dog yourself, with the comment - the police say ........ before handing him the lead.

These days I have to enable my OH to do just about everything.

 

[kindred]

Just a bit of a thought here - with bank branches closing down - mine did last week - how does one get to do some of the stuff like registering PoA, which used to be face to face? We live in the countryside, no car, infrequent bus service between just 2 towns -neither with branches of my bank..... life is going backwards not forwards

So agree. So agree. The rather trivial crunch point for me came when I left a note out for the milkman to ask him to cancel the eggs as OH in hospital. A note came through the door that the milkman was no longer able to accept requests, it had to be done on line. I thought, dear God, if you can't even put a note out for the milkman ... and cancelled the lot.
The bANK business is more serious though.

 

[john1939]

Hello, I have noticed recently as time and the illness progresses the PWD does less and less.
Clothes are strewn on the floor cups half empty left lying around. I am expected to wait at the dinner table to supply any water or extra cutlery
Can't remember to operate microwave now, or cooker, so that's down to me now. Seems that my wife is 100% dependent now.
You would think that she would express a tiny bit of gratitude for my efforts, not a bit of it.
I will digress now. Wife has recently become extremely verbally and physically aggressive.
Eventually discovered what was happening. While my back was turned she dropped all her pills into her tea then told me that she had taken them. I discovered the pills residue on the bottom of her tea cup.
The remedy was to let her lie in bed in the morning and get the care worker to administer them. This annoyed her a lot but I just held up my hands and said it had been decided that in future that's what would happen.

 

[john1939]

Hello, I have noticed recently as time and the illness progresses the PWD does less and less.
Clothes are strewn on the floor cups half empty left lying around. I am expected to wait at the dinner table to supply any water or extra cutlery
Can't remember to operate microwave now, or cooker, so that's down to me now. Seems that my wife is 100% dependent now.
You would think that she would express a tiny bit of gratitude for my efforts, not a bit of it.
I will digress now. Wife has recently become extremely verbally and physically aggressive.
Eventually discovered what was happening. While my back was turned she dropped all her pills into her tea then told me that she had taken them. I discovered the pills residue on the bottom of her tea cup.
The remedy was to let her lie in bed in the morning and get the care worker to administer them. This annoyed her a lot but I just held up my hands and said it had been decided that in future that's what would happen.

Wife was booked into local hairdresser. Eldest daughter came to take her. Of course wife not ready and resisted all efforts to hurry her up. Massive meltdown by daughter and wife, hairdressing appt cancelled. Just another day at the office.

 

[highland girl]

Wife was booked into local hairdresser. Eldest daughter came to take her. Of course wife not ready and resisted all efforts to hurry her up. Massive meltdown by daughter and wife, hairdressing appt cancelled. Just another day at the office.

Best laid plans and all that, my OH should be at day centre today but refusing to get dressed! Was really looking forward to seeing an old friend. So disappointed! But like you say just another day at the office!! Xx

 

[john1939]

Best laid plans and all that, my OH should be at day centre today but refusing to get dressed! Was really looking forward to seeing an old friend. So disappointed! But like you say just another day at the office!! Xx

Decided to strip the bed today, here's what I found. Four items of soiled underwear under the mattress along with a morning's medication and a broom. How she slept in a bed with a broom I will never know.
Another gem which I have discovered. Tins of peaches were going missing from the food cupboard. Discovered them in the wardrobe with the lids missing, they had spoiled of course.Asked PWD about it. .Denied all knowledge of them. Do I have to lock the food cupboard next?

 

[highland girl]

Decided to strip the bed today, here's what I found. Four items of soiled underwear under the mattress along with a morning's medication and a broom. How she slept in a bed with a broom I will never know.
Another gem which I have discovered. Tins of peaches were going missing from the food cupboard. Discovered them in the wardrobe with the lids missing, they had spoiled of course.Asked PWD about it. .Denied all knowledge of them. Do I have to lock the food cupboard next?

Luckily I don’t have those sort of problems with my other half, he does have some things in our bedroom that he likes to “keep” together, his watch, comb, that sort of thing. And sometimes he thinks he’s in an hotel so he’ll point st what he wants to take “home” as they are ours, suppose it’s a similar thing, it must be about keeping control. Hope you’re having a better week. Xx

 

[john1939]

Luckily I don’t have those sort of problems with my other half, he does have some things in our bedroom that he likes to “keep” together, his watch, comb, that sort of thing. And sometimes he thinks he’s in an hotel so he’ll point st what he wants to take “home” as they are ours, suppose it’s a similar thing, it must be about keeping control. Hope you’re having a better week. Xx

Thanks.. Reasonably good week. Today Sunday my PWD had a minor meltdown because I asked her if she really needed another dustpan and brush ( she has 16 at the last count ) She shouted obscene abuse at the checkout and people waiting in line thought it funny. I turned to them and said just one word "ALZHEIMERS". they nodded and some left to join other checkout queues. All in a day's work, as they say.

 

[highland girl]

My OH doesn’t like spending money (never had) so that’s not a problem. But we have embarrassing moments too. If you’d asked me 10 years ago if I could have dealt with them I would have said not a chance, but we do don’t we. My OH mobility has took a massive dive the last few days so I feel as if I’m in prison at moment. All this nice weather too! I keep wondering what the future holds, that’s the trouble when you’re not getting out you spend too much time thinking. I can never find the dustpan and brush when I need one! Have a good week! X

 

[john1939]

My OH doesn’t like spending money (never had) so that’s not a problem. But we have embarrassing moments too. If you’d asked me 10 years ago if I could have dealt with them I would have said not a chance, but we do don’t we. My OH mobility has took a massive dive the last few days so I feel as if I’m in prison at moment. All this nice weather too! I keep wondering what the future holds, that’s the trouble when you’re not getting out you spend too much time thinking. I can never find the dustpan and brush when I need one! Have a good week! X

Hello, she has gone to a hospital about 20miles away for a scan so I will have a sit out in the sun for a while. Dustpans? I could fill a ship's container with these and plastic boxes various hairbrushes , mops brooms etc.

 

[highland girl]

Hello, she has gone to a hospital about 20miles away for a scan so I will have a sit out in the sun for a while. Dustpans? I could fill a ship's container with these and plastic boxes various hairbrushes , mops brooms etc.

Hope the scan went okay and you managed to get some time in the sun. X

 

[john1939]

Yes, but no results. They usually send them to the GP so will be probably lost somewhere along the line.
Could not find the jam last night. Finally found it in PWD's bedroom, empty with a spoon in it, so it continues.

 

[highland girl]

Yes, but no results. They usually send them to the GP so will be probably lost somewhere along the line.
Could not find the jam last night. Finally found it in PWD's bedroom, empty with a spoon in it, so it continues.

At least she’s eating!! Xx

 

[john1939]

At least she’s eating!! Xx

Yes, I suppose I should be grateful, but her being a type 2 diabetic eating half a pot of marmalade is worrying.
My eldest daughter did a dustpan audit today ..Compulsion to buy dustpans has resulted in 32 dustpans stored in her wardrobe.as well as 14 pair of scissors.
I knew of an elderly neighbour who had stored over 50 pairs of shoes, some still in their boxes, so not too surprising

 

[highland girl]

Yes, I suppose I should be grateful, but her being a type 2 diabetic eating half a pot of marmalade is worrying.
My eldest daughter did a dustpan audit today ..Compulsion to buy dustpans has resulted in 32 dustpans stored in her wardrobe.as well as 14 pair of scissors.
I knew of an elderly neighbour who had stored over 50 pairs of shoes, some still in their boxes, so not too surprising

Oops sorry, yes it is a problem if she’s diabetic, I understand as I am too. Our elderly aunt it was tea bags, obviously couldn’t risk missing her cuppa! X