Can I ... Should I?
- Thread starter Sam Luvit
- Start date
Hi Rosy
Yes, it was a bit of a long one, but if I can keep mum calm, it's fine, she's just a sweet little old lady, do I work hard on that
. She sort of trusts me to get her sorted, so if I can be like a duck all calm on the surface while paddling like mad, it's ok
I'm back on camper van searches
Promise
Yes, it was a bit of a long one, but if I can keep mum calm, it's fine, she's just a sweet little old lady, do I work hard on that
. She sort of trusts me to get her sorted, so if I can be like a duck all calm on the surface while paddling like mad, it's ok I'm back on camper van searches
Promise
Sounds like you had a good time. Not been to that bit but I've heard Southport described as faded grandeur. Journey home, interesting!
Hi JM
Yes, that about sums up Southport now
The trip home was rather long, I managed to nurse the car to the garage tonight, out of heavy traffic time, a few judders, but it got the one mile. The 40 min walk home was unwelcome, as inexorably t the bill will be later in the week
I (carefully) passed lots of cyclists on the snake, thought of you while watching out for them
Yes, that about sums up Southport now
The trip home was rather long, I managed to nurse the car to the garage tonight, out of heavy traffic time, a few judders, but it got the one mile. The 40 min walk home was unwelcome, as inexorably t the bill will be later in the week
I (carefully) passed lots of cyclists on the snake, thought of you while watching out for them
Seems like the car will take a while . They are sending a part off to be tested, it'll take 10 days, so I'm going to be pretty much house bound for 2 weeks
I guess the walking to the shops will shift a bit of weight, but I'm not looking forward to trudging home with a heavy load. I went on Sat, waited 40 mins for a taxi that was promised in 10 mins.
No car & a PWD & all the appointments etc is like losing an arm It's just too blooming much & I want to pretend all is well, or hide under the duvet (except it's too hot & the dog still needs walking, the food still needs cooking & all the blooming rest)
So, thought I'd cheer myself up with a bit of rubbish TV. Mum went to bed (yay), so I picked a film she's not going to watch
The C Word. Seriously. I couldn't pick a love story, or a Rom Com, no I had to pick a depressing film about cancer But, you know what. It made me cry, but it was also a really touching film about life's struggles. Well worth watching.
I'm so lucky. I've made some real friends through this BS disease. Real people who don't run away from sickness. We check in on each other, we help each other.
On the L O N G trip home, Rosy & I played a game of song titles. Instead of sitting checking my watch I was humming songs & laughing. Thank you Rosy, it meant the world to me, feeling a bit alone in a service station car park, to know someone cared
While watching bruises appear today, Margi has had me giggling over her mum & we've swopped recipes for max fat content.
It's the little things
. They are sending a part off to be tested, it'll take 10 days, so I'm going to be pretty much house bound for 2 weeks I guess the walking to the shops will shift a bit of weight, but I'm not looking forward to trudging home with a heavy load. I went on Sat, waited 40 mins for a taxi that was promised in 10 mins.
No car & a PWD & all the appointments etc is like losing an arm
It's just too blooming much & I want to pretend all is well, or hide under the duvet (except it's too hot & the dog still needs walking, the food still needs cooking & all the blooming rest)So, thought I'd cheer myself up with a bit of rubbish TV. Mum went to bed (yay), so I picked a film she's not going to watch
The C Word. Seriously. I couldn't pick a love story, or a Rom Com, no I had to pick a depressing film about cancer
But, you know what. It made me cry, but it was also a really touching film about life's struggles. Well worth watching. I'm so lucky. I've made some real friends through this BS disease. Real people who don't run away from sickness. We check in on each other, we help each other.
On the L O N G trip home, Rosy & I played a game of song titles. Instead of sitting checking my watch I was humming songs & laughing. Thank you Rosy, it meant the world to me, feeling a bit alone in a service station car park, to know someone cared
While watching bruises appear today, Margi has had me giggling over her mum & we've swopped recipes for max fat content.
It's the little things
Morning Caroleca
It was fun playing the game & I'm sure I entertained some HGV drivers too , I got a few looks to be sure
It was fun playing the game & I'm sure I entertained some HGV drivers too
, I got a few looks to be sure
Morning LadyA
Yes it went well, so good to spend a little time with rarely seen friends & family, phone calls are just not the same as chatting over a meal or a coffee
I'd of liked to have seen more of Rosy, but at least we got some time together. Sometimes you just have to take what you are able to
I've been thinking about a delivery, after all, it's not like I will have to make sure I'm home for it & although I don't relish the walk, it does get me out the house, so I'm a bit undecided right now
Maybe I'll do a proper shopping list & order that, but walk to the shop for bread & milk. Sort of a compromise
Yes it went well, so good to spend a little time with rarely seen friends & family, phone calls are just not the same as chatting over a meal or a coffee
I'd of liked to have seen more of Rosy, but at least we got some time together. Sometimes you just have to take what you are able to
I've been thinking about a delivery, after all, it's not like I will have to make sure I'm home for it
& although I don't relish the walk, it does get me out the house, so I'm a bit undecided right nowMaybe I'll do a proper shopping list & order that, but walk to the shop for bread & milk. Sort of a compromise
Hi Izzy
I'm a talker, I need to explain it "out load" to make sense of it, so yes, it helped to put it down on paper so to speak
I hope to mix in the funny with the ranting, it will help remind me it's not all doom and gloom.
We do have our laughs & I do tease her, it breaks the tension & works for now. I'm sure I'll be trying many things over time & stealing lots of ideas from you here
I've been reading on here until my eyes ache, but learning all the time. Hats off to all of you who have been doing this for so long, especially those at a for more advanced level than I am dealing with
Better get myself to work before I'm late
Well done. Great post I'm a talker too. Enjoyed the funny, the ranting and the love you show for your family.
'Friend' once said dementia wasn't so bad living with husband who is so withdrawn that he rarely speaks and leaves room if it changes his routine because some (people with dementia) are violent. Really? Though I'm allowed to say there are advantages i.e. I choose get to choose tv programmes and no sport. Mixed feeling about phrases praising me... 'how do you cope? I couldn't do it. You're amazing etc. Well I think that A if you love somebody you will cope the best you can however much or little that may be. And B sometimes there just isn't a bloody choice. Slipped into little rant there.
So I get what you're saying and hope it is okay to say how much I admire how you're managing your family and people involved with them!
Sam I do my main big shop on line every week now and then if Mum is able we will just pop in for little things more of a little outing than anything else.
Please don't try to lug heavy bags about think of your shoulder and waiting for taxis is a nightmare, just tap away and order on line.
It's amazing how we take our cars so much for granted but when it's out of action
I'm not surprised you feel tired after such a long journey home you'll need a few days to recover, try and take it easy... I can hear you laughing at that one..
Please don't try to lug heavy bags about think of your shoulder and waiting for taxis is a nightmare, just tap away and order on line.
It's amazing how we take our cars so much for granted but when it's out of action
I'm not surprised you feel tired after such a long journey home you'll need a few days to recover, try and take it easy... I can hear you laughing at that one..
I agree friends fade or shine I find. Apart from my lovely family none of whom live within two hours of me the greatest help I have is from a neighbour I hardly knew. Originally she came to help with housework and husband when I had cancer treatment. Two years later she is still helping as my husbands dementia becomes more challenging. Though a bit battered I obviously survived!
A friend who lives manymiles away who phones every couple weeks to put the world to rights for hours on a long lonely evening. The former colleagues I meet for coffee some Saturday mornings and who brought us takeaways when chemo was tough. The (young) friend who didn't know what to say so sent random texts with emoticons and kisses. Isn't it the little things? I'm not even going to think of the friends and family who faded out of sight when we need it the most! I feel very positive and will enjoy the rest of my day!
Afternoon all,
I am very glad to hear that the Blackpool Babes had a good time and, eventually, got home safely!
Sam, what a terrible journey home You did a great job of keeping your mum calm and thank goodness for Dave and those like him. I concur with the advice to get as much shopping as you can on-line, just get the bits of fresh as you need them - you really need to look after that shoulder.
Mum wasn't too great when we saw her on Sunday. She was coughing quite a lot and I strongly suspect she is aspirating when she eats and drinks. I know I should get the SALT people involved. However, food is the only pleasure Mum has now and I really don't want to limit what she can have, even if that does hasten her end somewhat
Sky-cat isn't great either and it is looking more likely that she has something rather nasty. So I'm feeling rather emotionally fragile at the moment, hence my less frequent posts.
I am very glad to hear that the Blackpool Babes had a good time and, eventually, got home safely!
Sam, what a terrible journey home
You did a great job of keeping your mum calm and thank goodness for Dave and those like him. I concur with the advice to get as much shopping as you can on-line, just get the bits of fresh as you need them - you really need to look after that shoulder.Mum wasn't too great when we saw her on Sunday. She was coughing quite a lot and I strongly suspect she is aspirating when she eats and drinks. I know I should get the SALT people involved. However, food is the only pleasure Mum has now and I really don't want to limit what she can have, even if that does hasten her end somewhat
Sky-cat isn't great either and it is looking more likely that she has something rather nasty. So I'm feeling rather emotionally fragile at the moment, hence my less frequent posts.
Ay
when I first started reading some posts I felt uncomfortable, like I was eves dropping on private conversations, between close friends. Now I feel I am one of the friends Hope you are having a restful evening Molly
Hi Nanawendy
Feel free to rant away, we all need to do that & im probably one if the biggest ranters
, something to do with having no one I can rant to in real life, apart from my youngest, who lives 99 miles away & has his own life too. But, he's a sweetheart & understands I find the praise difficult to take, she's my mum & it's me or a care home, so choices are few
Pull up a stool, grab a coffee & share the troubles, it makes it easier
.
Mum wasn't too great when we saw her on Sunday. She was coughing quite a lot and I strongly suspect she is aspirating when she eats and drinks. I know I should get the SALT people involved. However, food is the only pleasure Mum has now and I really don't want to limit what she can have, even if that does hasten her end somewhat
Sky-cat isn't great either and it is looking more likely that she has something rather nasty. So I'm feeling rather emotionally fragile at the moment, hence my less frequent posts.
Hi Slugsta
Blackpool was fun in a demented way
the trams were fun, the staff were brilliant & the beds were comfortable. Being able to talk without censor was a relief I've chatted with J (neighbour & friend) & am planning on sorting a proper shop for delivery, she's welcome to add anything she needs & save on delivery. Otherwise I'd need to go every day, bringing home one heavy item at a time. You forget how heavy 4 x 2 pints of milk are until you have to carry them a mile
The journey was worse looking back than at the time! The first time I found myself in the outside lane, doing 70, & suddenly no power was a heart stopper, got into the middle ok, but had a "wide load" on the inside, so hazards, apology & over, then onto the hard shoulder. I did take a breath & force the calm, as I didn't need mum getting worked up. So, it was just a case of shrugging my shoulders & saying "guess I'll call recovery then"
I'm sorry your mum is not so good, but totally agree with you letting her enjoy what she can. Mums just finished treatment for skin cancer, I think she has another spot (appointment in the wings), but she loves the sun & I'm not going to stop her from sitting in it. There is so little left to enjoy, so taking that away seems cruel.
Our pets are so important to us, they love us unconditionally & it hurts so much when they are unwell, so I get you not posting. It's hard on you. Chip in when you feel up to it. Hope you get things sorted soon
Hi Rosy
If I'm honest, although mum gets in the car 50% of the time to help with parking, she stays in the car & I shop solo, the other times it's a 45 min break out the house. I find shopping with mum very tiring, she will always think of something as we head for the checkout
Being without a car, it's just such a pain, as the extra time to get to & from a shop, bank etc is frustrating. I can't get to my volunteer job now, if I was being paid, I'd get the bus or train, but I can't afford to pay to volunteer, so while I feel guilty about not going in, I just can't. But that Suso means I'm "home" 24/7
Lol. Yeah, laughed at that. Take it easy
. But I've been like a little old lady myself the last 3 days, sitting down mid afternoon, almost passing out & slept for 3 hours I think it's just all catching up with me. I do feel a fraud saying that when I've seen how much you do, but I am just so tired out.
