How many of us dread Xmas.
- Thread starter angiebails
- Start date
Echoing what the others have said, fastwalker. Sorry to hear your mother and I hope you enjoy your break.
Sent from my GT-N5110
Sent from my GT-N5110
Hello Fastwalker,
May I ask where you are going on your walking holiday? Will it be warm or will you be carrying a thermal tent?
(It sounds a fabulous idea - Do let us know how you get on)
May I ask where you are going on your walking holiday? Will it be warm or will you be carrying a thermal tent?
(It sounds a fabulous idea - Do let us know how you get on)
Thank you for the kind comments. Hair Twiddler I am going to Derbyshire so I will need warm clothes. There was very little availability so late so I didn't have a lot of choice. A single friend gave me the idea when he said he would go away if anything happened to his mother. I didn't think my poor mum would make Christmas but had thought about doing something like this. This year she can have a great one as she will be free from dementia.
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this is what i'm going for this year, hope the link works https://www.facebook.com/105988779495533/photos/pb.105988779495533.-2207520000.1417825524./736782906416114/?type=3&theater
yep, i don't enjoy xmas that much anymore. it is just obligation city for me. all i want to do is run away with my immediate family and ignore everyone else, go on holiday and leave them all alone. but i can't.
i have come to the very sad realisation that this year will be the last year that my children will believe, it's hanging on by a thread, and my parents have ruined the potential of any magical christmas' while my children were young. they have spoilt each and every christmas that they have been at for us. and now it's over. my 8 year old is at the point that i'm confident she won't believe by next year.
the only great christmas we had was when we decided to run away and go camping with my sister in law and her kids and not have my parents there to ruin it. of course that came with a tonne of guilt, and drama, but i had to do it, i had to have one christmas that i could enjoy. each year my parents would turn up, sleep over at our house, and my dad would do the gumpy bah humbug act because he has some kind of chip on his should about christmas. and i'd do all the work, they wouldn't help so i'd get cross. if they aren't going to get the kids excited, well, help out and get the work done.
this year my sister is coming from overseas and she can't understand that i'll just be turning up for lunch, and leaving four hours later. she can't understand why i don't want to stay christmas eve. even though i've told her countless times that dad just is grumpy and negative and tells the kids off and doens't let them enjoy their christmas.
blergh!
this year i'm going away, camping with friends the week before christmas. my partner can't even come because of work committments, so it'll be me and the girls in the tent. i'll have my fun then. i've had a hard year work wise, returning to work, 6 days a week all year. finanial problems with my partners work situation early in the year. i've quit my job so next year is uncertain and due to be up and down, crazy busy and unstable work wise, so i'm having my week holiday, and god forbid anyone who tries to ruin that for me. christmas, well i'm putting little effort, thought and planning into it.
yep, i don't enjoy xmas that much anymore. it is just obligation city for me. all i want to do is run away with my immediate family and ignore everyone else, go on holiday and leave them all alone. but i can't.
i have come to the very sad realisation that this year will be the last year that my children will believe, it's hanging on by a thread, and my parents have ruined the potential of any magical christmas' while my children were young. they have spoilt each and every christmas that they have been at for us. and now it's over. my 8 year old is at the point that i'm confident she won't believe by next year.
the only great christmas we had was when we decided to run away and go camping with my sister in law and her kids and not have my parents there to ruin it. of course that came with a tonne of guilt, and drama, but i had to do it, i had to have one christmas that i could enjoy. each year my parents would turn up, sleep over at our house, and my dad would do the gumpy bah humbug act because he has some kind of chip on his should about christmas. and i'd do all the work, they wouldn't help so i'd get cross. if they aren't going to get the kids excited, well, help out and get the work done.
this year my sister is coming from overseas and she can't understand that i'll just be turning up for lunch, and leaving four hours later. she can't understand why i don't want to stay christmas eve. even though i've told her countless times that dad just is grumpy and negative and tells the kids off and doens't let them enjoy their christmas.
blergh!
this year i'm going away, camping with friends the week before christmas. my partner can't even come because of work committments, so it'll be me and the girls in the tent. i'll have my fun then. i've had a hard year work wise, returning to work, 6 days a week all year. finanial problems with my partners work situation early in the year. i've quit my job so next year is uncertain and due to be up and down, crazy busy and unstable work wise, so i'm having my week holiday, and god forbid anyone who tries to ruin that for me. christmas, well i'm putting little effort, thought and planning into it.
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I had a Cindy about 40 years ago.
I haven't bought a single present this year. I sent money to my son in the USA so that he could buy gifts for his family, as I haven't got a clue what toys and clothes they have, and what they need.My daughter, son-in-law and Grand-daughter have had money for the past few years, but I've usually bought a present for them too. Friends and I tend to meet up for lunch, and that is so much nicer nowadays. We've all agreed to do this.
But I tell a lie. I have bought one present. A squeaky toy for Billy.
I have bought one present. A squeaky toy for Billy.
I'm glad to hear you have your priorities right Scarlett.
The first things I bought were for Dougal; something for him to "kill" by shaking!
Well what a can of worms. I have read through all your versions of Xmas and it can show that prehaps mine aren't as bad as they will be in the future. There are some very brave TP members out there and i hold my hat to them.
I wish you all a peaceful Xmas as I think merry went out of the window when the dreaded disease came in.
Good will to all and keep caring it's what we do best.
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I wish you all a peaceful Xmas as I think merry went out of the window when the dreaded disease came in.
Good will to all and keep caring it's what we do best.
Sent from my iPad using Talking Point
A good thread, Angie. It has made me think about the good things in my life, and, although Christmas can be difficult, I know there are others who will have a tougher time than me.
I do find all the advertising and commercialism difficult, but that seems to be the norm today.
I do find all the advertising and commercialism difficult, but that seems to be the norm today.
So nice to read how others cope. I got a bit sad this week doing the cards, having to write notes in them telling folks that OH is now in care. Then I dithered about whether to sign the cards just from me or from both of us. Weird life.
I will be working Christmas Eve and morning, then to the CH for a while. I will then quietly close the door and kick my shoes off, as I have no other family or a dog to walk. OH's family nowhere to be seen, sons away abroad for holidays. To me that is strange, not wanting to be together for a family holiday, but they never have. I'm getting away after New Year, though, first time on my own.
I hope you all have the best holiday you can, given the circumstances. You are all amazing!
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I will be working Christmas Eve and morning, then to the CH for a while. I will then quietly close the door and kick my shoes off, as I have no other family or a dog to walk. OH's family nowhere to be seen, sons away abroad for holidays. To me that is strange, not wanting to be together for a family holiday, but they never have. I'm getting away after New Year, though, first time on my own.
I hope you all have the best holiday you can, given the circumstances. You are all amazing!
Sent from my iPad using Talking Point
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It's difficult isn't it. I decided to shorten my "3 strikes and you're out" rule to 2. Usually I cross someone off my Christmas card list, if I've sent them cards for 3 years running, without a reply. I've now cut it to 2 years.
I signed both our names on all the cards, except my "conscience" ones. I have sent these to 6 people, who were either cousins of John's (2) or long term friends for over 40 years (4), who dropped us like hot bricks, and vaporised, when things got bad.
I wrote in these "I thought you might want to know about John's health" and spoke of his heart attacks, IPF, and worsening AD, and the fact he was now in a Care Home. I ended these cards "Naturally, I drown in guilt, but after more than a decade since John was first diagnosed with this cruel disease, I just couldn't cope any more. I wish you and your family well". And these I just signed from myself.
My daughter said they are all such sh*ts that they'll just tear them up and bin them, but if they have one teeny weeny guilty thought, it will have been worth it. I'm actually very angry with these people. I know you don't do things for others so that you'll get help back, but, for example, I've provided written references for all their children, every time they've applied for new jobs, and yet they can't spend 5 minutes to even text me.
Husband in care home
First Christmas with OH in a care home, absolutely dreading Christmas don't know what else to say, just want to lock myself alone in a room until 2nd January
First Christmas with OH in a care home, absolutely dreading Christmas don't know what else to say, just want to lock myself alone in a room until 2nd January
Me too, and many other friends on here. Perhaps we ought to all lock ourselves away, and get blind drunk.
Me too, and many other friends on here. Perhaps we ought to all lock ourselves away, and get blind drunk.
Sounds good to me Scarlett. We could then sleep it off and it will all be over for another year.
Dreading it. Lost my mum in May and had to place my Dad in care in November. Trying to hang onto lovely memories of past Christmases and putting on a brave face but it's tough. A big hug to everyone. Xx
Well we are nearly there and I have told him to take down the decorations. How can you possibly have Xmas when he treats me like this. Feeling very depressed.
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Sent from my iPad using Talking Point
