First things first I like to say thank you to everyone on here who have been nothing but encouraging. It really helps especially now because I had to throw away food. My mother unfroze the raw chicken I had in our freezer and mixed it up with the food I had cooked. I had to throw the rest of the cooked food away because it was contaminated. I'm looking into buying a lock 🔒 for the refrigerator.
Anyway getting down to business. This past week I found myself getting ****ed off at two of my friends at two different times.
The first incident was where I got into heated discussion with one of my friends whom basically gave me a lecture on the way back home from downtown along the lines of "that I don't know what I'm doing with my life" It felt patronizing.
(Dude you have a DUI and you still continue to drive while drinking alcohol in your car. )
That wasn't explicitly said but that's exactly how I felt. I like to believe he meant well but I'm not an idiot or stupid. I set goals. I'm a very motivated person. It's been a challenge this past year but I'm literally doing the best I can in this situation. And nobody wants to help me. Forget about the people who say they will. Actions speak louder than words. The last thing I need is a lecture from anybody who has no freaking clue on what's like to be a caregiver. Especially if they invite me out late at night to go drinking. I'm setting aside TIME for you as a friend.
Time I can set aside for myself to watch movies or play some video games. Don't give me a lecture on how owning a business works. I know how it works. I'm taking care of an Alzheimer's patient for christ sake. I can't just drop everything like you can to focus solely on one thing.
Here's the next part. A couple days ago one of my other friends called me be back. I called him a few days before to wish him congrats on getting engage to his fiance.
He called me back late at night to FaceTime. We caught up on things etc. He knows about the situation I'm in.
I think he's on some sort of adrenaline rush lately because the way he was talking to me was rude & patronizing. He's not on drugs. He said was afraid that he missed out on the past 5 years of his life constantly working with no break.
I'm guessing he's letting his new found fame on YouTube get to his head a little bit.
(Btw I like to think my friends have my best interest in life when give me suggestions or advice. That is why I'm more open minded towards them and also more forgiving. However I'm also very discerning. I need more information when it comes to certain decisions I make. Low risk, high gaurentee. That's just how I make decisions.)
He was asking me for my mother prescription bottle that is used to treat her dementia and said "I'll take care of you guys" Mind you we go way back. 30 years. I'm 31 now. Our parents were friends before we were born. We have a ton of history.
I asked "Why. What are you going to do with it? What do you mean?"
But he kept repeating "Don't worry about it."
He wouldn't tell me anything. He just kept repeating himself and acted like I was being unreasonable. Then he hung up as if he expected me to call him back.
I don't chase people.
Then he called me back telling me the same thing.
He hung up again.
Then the next day he messaged me the reason why but thought I wouldn't believe him.
He called me up again then proceeds to gaslight me. Which is when I finally let him hear a mouth full along the lines of
"I don't need the extra stress."
Has anyone ever had similar experiences with friends in this particular situation whilst being a caregiver?
If so how did you manage?
Anyway getting down to business. This past week I found myself getting ****ed off at two of my friends at two different times.
The first incident was where I got into heated discussion with one of my friends whom basically gave me a lecture on the way back home from downtown along the lines of "that I don't know what I'm doing with my life" It felt patronizing.
(Dude you have a DUI and you still continue to drive while drinking alcohol in your car. )
That wasn't explicitly said but that's exactly how I felt. I like to believe he meant well but I'm not an idiot or stupid. I set goals. I'm a very motivated person. It's been a challenge this past year but I'm literally doing the best I can in this situation. And nobody wants to help me. Forget about the people who say they will. Actions speak louder than words. The last thing I need is a lecture from anybody who has no freaking clue on what's like to be a caregiver. Especially if they invite me out late at night to go drinking. I'm setting aside TIME for you as a friend.
Time I can set aside for myself to watch movies or play some video games. Don't give me a lecture on how owning a business works. I know how it works. I'm taking care of an Alzheimer's patient for christ sake. I can't just drop everything like you can to focus solely on one thing.
Here's the next part. A couple days ago one of my other friends called me be back. I called him a few days before to wish him congrats on getting engage to his fiance.
He called me back late at night to FaceTime. We caught up on things etc. He knows about the situation I'm in.
I think he's on some sort of adrenaline rush lately because the way he was talking to me was rude & patronizing. He's not on drugs. He said was afraid that he missed out on the past 5 years of his life constantly working with no break.
I'm guessing he's letting his new found fame on YouTube get to his head a little bit.
(Btw I like to think my friends have my best interest in life when give me suggestions or advice. That is why I'm more open minded towards them and also more forgiving. However I'm also very discerning. I need more information when it comes to certain decisions I make. Low risk, high gaurentee. That's just how I make decisions.)
He was asking me for my mother prescription bottle that is used to treat her dementia and said "I'll take care of you guys" Mind you we go way back. 30 years. I'm 31 now. Our parents were friends before we were born. We have a ton of history.
I asked "Why. What are you going to do with it? What do you mean?"
But he kept repeating "Don't worry about it."
He wouldn't tell me anything. He just kept repeating himself and acted like I was being unreasonable. Then he hung up as if he expected me to call him back.
I don't chase people.
Then he called me back telling me the same thing.
He hung up again.
Then the next day he messaged me the reason why but thought I wouldn't believe him.
He called me up again then proceeds to gaslight me. Which is when I finally let him hear a mouth full along the lines of
"I don't need the extra stress."
Has anyone ever had similar experiences with friends in this particular situation whilst being a caregiver?
If so how did you manage?
