Pacing, restlesness, agitation, confusion,

[kristian P]

I am helping with caring for my mother in law who went from hosting a christmas dinner to a complete delusional, confused, and unable to care for herself within 3 months.
I Am at the end of the road here. Nothing works, nothing helps. It takes rotation of 4 people to take care of her now.
She was bitter, narcissist, negative, controling and self centerd person before and now it has gone up 10 fold to the point we are desperate for some help.
It takes 3 people to bring her to the emergency.
I am not sure if its side effects from the meds, but she is constantly walking around the house, always pulling us to help her with something (but there is nothing). She is crying, aggitated, frustrated, wont take pills, always on a mission to figure something out (but there is nothing) she is eating things she shouldnt be eating like soap, make up,
Brusshing her hair with toothbrush, raking leaves in the garden with ski poles, shes started to talk nonsense, always comes to us to help her with something that she cant explain, which always ends with nonsense. Every minute she comes with a new item or new task she needs help with. For Example she comes to me with an extension cord or a pen or a book and says:" Please help me, I cant, you know how to do this, can you do this for me, this is very important, hurry up this has to be done now. I am lost for words with this woman. I am watching my wife and my father in law go throug hell 24 hrs a day. I am cutting back my work hours to help my wife from collapsing.
Does anyone have any experience with this?
She is on Zyprexa, Propanadol, Clonazapine
We have tried Haldol and others.
Thank you all in advance

 

[lollyc]

I can relate to some of this, although my mother wasn't quite as bad.

She ultimately ended up on Mirtazipine, Quetiapine and, Lorazapam (as and when required), but we tried many others on the way.
Many medications are available as a liquid form, or orodispersible tablets, which dissolve under the tongue, and might make taking the medications easier.
I believe Zyprexa is olanzapine, which isn't recommended with dementia, so you may want as ask her doctor to review that.
I know it is no consolation, but this phase will eventually pass.

I suspect you aren't in UK? Here you could request an assessment both for her and her carers, and possibly get her into a day centre / dementia group, so that you could all have a much needed break.

 

[SeaSwallow]

@kristian P Welcome to Talking Point. What a difficult position for you all to be in, it must be totally exhausting. Like @Lolly I get the impression that you are not based in the U.K. so I am not sure what care is available where you are. You say that it takes four of you on rotation to care for your MIL. This is not sustainable. What if one of you takes ill. Eventually you could all reach carer breakdown.
I really think that you need to consider permanent residence in a care facility but not an easy decision I know.