This is breaking my heart. Our lovely carer went on holiday recently. Since she's come back, Mum thinks the carer is not the same. She thinks the carer is hiding things, playing mean tricks, she thinks the carer is hanging out with a gang downstairs. Things like "she was here, then I went to the loo, and she was gone". "she said to me 'I'm going - you'll never see me again' ". Mum has taken to hiding things because she thinks the carer is stealing from her, then of course we can't find those things so she thinks the care has taken them. When do do find them it's 'the carer who has hidden them'. I hate this... I spoke to the carer this morning, who was nearly in tears. She knows this is all part of the disease but she has grown so fond of my Mum. This carer has been my total rock! Of course there is no talking to or convincing my Mum. It seems to me the only course of action would be to change the carer. But then what if the same thing happen again. Just don't know what to do. This is all new. So overwhelming.
Mum hates the carer that she used to love. The carer has been my rock. What do I do?
- Thread starter Gee7
- Start date
Could always try giving the carer a week (or so ) off and then bringing her back telling your mum that she's new but is a great friend of the 'previous' carer that mum liked and perhaps mum could explain everything to her ... no idea if it'll work but must be worth a go in the circumstances ...
Changing the carer is unlikely to make any difference, your mum will just transfer those feelings to her, either immediately or in due course. As a previous poster said it's common for people with dementia to accuse those closest to them, including their own relatives.
Phil's suggestion of giving the carer a break could work, it's worth trying.
Phil's suggestion of giving the carer a break could work, it's worth trying.
Similar threads
