TP really does have a tremendous group of people.
Thanks to everyone for your kind comments here.
Today caught me unawares.
I have been planning it minutely since last week, fearful lest I let Jan down by not doing it just right.
I felt things were starting to unravel today when, en route for the crematorium, there was an immovable traffic jam in front of me. I had a car full of people, my Dad, an old colleague from the University of Leeds, and my second cousin and his wife from Vancouver.
Realising I might be held up for ages if there was an accident ahead of me, I executed a quick left turn and, at speed, flew over the speed bumps in a side road [much muttering from passengers], and used a totally different route.
On arrival the first thing I saw in the car park was a minibus full of carers from Jan's home, then, from every direction friends from past and present, and all of Nina's family.
It was touching that so many varied people had taken the trouble to come. From TP there was Craig, Katherine and Said, and also Nada, who originally put TP together with Craig.
Along with my brother, my step-son, and my step-son-in-law, I carried Jan into the service. This was hugely emotional and the organist was playing Elgar's "Nimrod", long a favourite of Jan's.
The minister was the lady who had conducted Nina's husband's service - I had specifically asked for her again - and the words she had put together were wonderful.
We had "Love Divine [Blaenwern]" then my tribute. Well, I almost made it through without choking up. I was fine until I looked and saw all the lovely people there, with step-grand-daughter weeping. Fortunately I had only a para to go so I rushed it.
Then "Praise my Soul the King of Heaven" - we had that at our wedding, and finally the poem by my step-daughter.
After the committal, we had selected "Hen Wlad Fy Nhadau" [Land of my Fathers] as the exit music and it was just right. Jan was a proud Welshwoman, and the music was emotional, and uplifting.
Outside in the sunshine, the children released the balloons with messages to Jan and everyone applauded.
We drove to a lovely golf centre with an Inn on the Lake, and had refreshments in the sunshine. It was a happy time, with only happy memories being discussed.
The carers said they loved seeing me carrying Jan into the service, and that alone justified the action for me. I wanted to do it because I didn't want to stop carrying Jan right at the very end of our long journey.
I am in the process of tallying a wad of donations to Alzheimer's Society.
I don't think there was anything more, or anything better we could have done today, so I am also at peace.
After 9 years of worrying about Jan's care in the home, and a further ten before that too, I can stand down. Jan is at peace and her life has been celebrated.