You couldn't make it up!

Discussion in 'I have a partner with dementia' started by Jinx, Jul 25, 2015.

  1. Chuggalug

    Chuggalug Registered User

    Mar 24, 2014
    8,007
    Norfolk
    Really feel for you Jinx. Didn't realise things were that bad for you. Also sad that your hubby doesn't know his son, now. Left me rather speechless, this has :(
     
  2. Jinx

    Jinx Registered User

    Mar 13, 2014
    2,333
    Pontypool
    Not that bad really, I'm incredibly lucky to have both daughters close by and very supportive. We are where we are and I must make the most of it while I still have OH at home, believe me I don't have even a twelfth of the problems you do.....I know: it's not a competition!!


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  3. Chuggalug

    Chuggalug Registered User

    Mar 24, 2014
    8,007
    Norfolk
    So much has changed now he's being cared for. I'm no longer manic and angry all the time. I used to be dreadful. Things here are slowly but surely sorting themselves out. I've been blown away at the caring officials who I've met. Seriously, Jinx. It's been an eye-opener. More of that to come yet, but I don't fear it, now. Just get everything tidied away so I know where I am, and life can go on, on a much better level. Only anuvver six months to wait for that to happen :D Might not be that long, aye :)
     
  4. Jinx

    Jinx Registered User

    Mar 13, 2014
    2,333
    Pontypool
    Cloudy here today but yesterday was beautiful so took OH out and asked if he'd like to go to coast or country. "Coast" he said so we duly drove to the seaside. We'd reached a fairly remote stretch of coast road, nevertheless heavily populated with sun seekers when OH uttered those immortal words 'I need a poo'. Fortunately I remembered a beach with a small shop and toilets. Persuaded the car park attendant that we weren't staying so he didn't charge us £3.00 and managed to get OH to the Gents in time. Had to enlist help as he couldn't see or find the cubicle and it was very busy so I couldn't really go in. Hovered around the doorway and eventually himself emerged. By the time we'd got back to the car he was exhausted and wanted to go straight home! I was looking forward to a peaceful evening but sundowning put paid to that. OH was up and down, jacket on, cap on, trying all the doors and constantly asking if I was ready and were we going. Isn't this all such fun.


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  5. Jinx

    Jinx Registered User

    Mar 13, 2014
    2,333
    Pontypool
    Spent the morning moving my 'garden in pots' as work due to start this week to remove the dodgy decking and replace it with paving slabs plus proper ramped access for OH. Once that's done I can think about creating my small garden. 8 tons of top soil due to be delivered tomorrow pm so it can be tipped before walls are built. Excited!


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  6. Kjn

    Kjn Registered User

    Jul 27, 2013
    5,835
    Oh lovely, can't beat a bit of garden excitement.
     
  7. esmeralda

    esmeralda Registered User

    Nov 27, 2014
    3,072
    Devon
    Well done for negotiating the poo incident Jinx. Must admit it's the bit of the day I dread most, especially as OH has so many difficulties with mobility.
    I am excited for you about your garden - 8 TONS of topsoil to play with:):):)
    xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
     
  8. Jinx

    Jinx Registered User

    Mar 13, 2014
    2,333
    Pontypool
    I can't quite imagine what 8 tons looks like, and hope my dau and I did our maths right when we worked it out!!! I have an image of the delivery driver clutching his sides in mirth and saying 'you think that lot is going to fit in there, you're having a larf!!!'


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  9. 2jays

    2jays Registered User

    Jun 4, 2010
    11,598
    West Midlands
    8 tons?? :eek:

    I'm assuming you have a large garden... It's either that or you are building your own mountain :D

    Hard work shifting 3 tons.... I did that once.... Never again....

    8 tons??? Wow you will have muscles where you never thought you could have them :D

    It will look wonderful when it's finished, I'm sure :)


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  10. Jinx

    Jinx Registered User

    Mar 13, 2014
    2,333
    Pontypool
    Now your scaring me 2jays! We've taken out about 2ft of clay and need to build up the levels, it's not a big garden at all it's all about depth. That never-re-assuring phrase 'it'll be fine' comes to mind.....!


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  11. Chuggalug

    Chuggalug Registered User

    Mar 24, 2014
    8,007
    Norfolk
    From reading this; maybe it was a good thing hubby never wanted to come out on trips with me. The times I did take him anywhere, there was only one time when he was upset, as he couldn't connect with where he was. Most confusing for him. Can't have been nice at all. I kept trying to imagine what it must have felt like, Jinx. I just couldn't. Frightening, I'd imagine.
     
  12. Jinx

    Jinx Registered User

    Mar 13, 2014
    2,333
    Pontypool
    When I take Bernard out he often thinks we are in London where he grew up and will start giving me directions as to which turnings I should take and then gets agitated when I go a different (correct) way. He does the same with his Shared Lives carers who take him out, and when he gets back he tells me how stupid they are and they don't listen to him! As you say Chuggs it must be horrible not to understand or know where you are. He never recognises our house either and I guess as we have only been here 7 months he will probably never know that it's 'home'. I can't dwell on it too long as it's so sad to see him as he is compared to how he was, but then we all feel like that on here don't we?


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  13. Jinx

    Jinx Registered User

    Mar 13, 2014
    2,333
    Pontypool
    Looks like that, and doesn't appear as if it's much too much but we'll only know when we start spreading and that won't be for a few weeks yet.

    ImageUploadedByTalking Point1439222305.675644.jpg



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  14. reedysue

    reedysue Registered User

    Nov 4, 2014
    4,664
    Scotland
    We had 4 of those bags and could do with another 4, have fun moving it.
     
  15. Jinx

    Jinx Registered User

    Mar 13, 2014
    2,333
    Pontypool
    I was due to go out for the day with my ladies group, but poor hubby had a violent bout of sickness during the night so I couldn't let him go to day care. I had arranged for a carer to sit until he would have been picked up so as I'd taken a day off work and as OH had made a remarkable recovery I made the most of the couple of hours and caught up with various errands.

    Later took him out for a drive and he managed to eat a fairly large ice cream. Then I had another couple of hours at the end of the afternoon while a carer was with hubby and I was able to walk to a local landmark and enjoy the beautiful country spread out around me. ImageUploadedByTalking Point1439328950.802269.jpg
    ImageUploadedByTalking Point1439328979.948188.jpg
    ImageUploadedByTalking Point1439329016.272576.jpg


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  16. esmeralda

    esmeralda Registered User

    Nov 27, 2014
    3,072
    Devon
    Lovely photos Jinx, can you walk there from your house?
    Glad your hubby got over his sickness.
    Your garden is going to be lovely with all that wonderful topsoil. I'm sure you always needd more than you think you will and it will settle.
    xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
     
  17. Jinx

    Jinx Registered User

    Mar 13, 2014
    2,333
    Pontypool
    #37 Jinx, Aug 12, 2015
    Last edited: Aug 12, 2015
    It is possible to walk there from our house, Es, it 's probably less than two miles but I took the car to within about half a mile yesterday and walked up but my knees and right hip had a right moan last night. Not to mention the fact that I was fairly puffed by the time I got up there! I need to do more hill walking but OH can't walk any more than a few yards now so I usually end up walking on the flat pushing him in his wheelchair. Again we're lucky as we have the Brecon to Monmouth canal very close by which is ideal for the chair. Throughout 'The Valleys' old mine workings have been turned into country parks and these are usually quite accessible with smooth, level paths. This one is Parc Cwm Daran.
    ImageUploadedByTalking Point1439364287.241588.jpg


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  18. Chuggalug

    Chuggalug Registered User

    Mar 24, 2014
    8,007
    Norfolk
    Oh, what a gorgeous picture. Looks like it was taken through a filter. Are you a pro photographer, Jinx? Really impressed with this :)
     
  19. esmeralda

    esmeralda Registered User

    Nov 27, 2014
    3,072
    Devon
    Hope your knees and hip are being kinder to you today Jinx. I think I would take the car if it was two miles away.
    It sounds as though you live in a lovely area, and it's really good to have level places to take the wheelchair. trouble with Devon is, very little is flat!:D
    xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
     
  20. Jinx

    Jinx Registered User

    Mar 13, 2014
    2,333
    Pontypool
    No Chuggs just an amateur, it was actually quite an overcast day as I remember but the light on the water was lovely.


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