1. MelissaParker

    MelissaParker Registered User

    Aug 11, 2007
    13
    I just need to say that each and everyone of you deserves a medal! Not only are you all going through stress and trauma dealing with your own difficulties and emotions but you still find the strength to give so much (goodness knows where you find it) to support and care for others who need help!

    I'm absolutely honoured to have found you and to be connected with you. You are all saints. I take my hat off to you all. YOU ARE ALL AMAZING and never forget that!!!!!!

    Melissa
     
  2. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    Melissa, thank you for that, it's lovely that you feel that way.

    But I for one am no saint, and I think most members would say the same. We all have days when we cry and think we can't cope any more; days when we get angry with the ones we most care for; days when we rant and rave about the unfairness of it all, the unfairness of the system, the uncaring attitude of SWs and hospital nurses.

    Then we come on TP, and people comfort us, offer advice, virtual hugs, even a joke. And that makes the bad day so much better, because we have friends who understand.

    We all want the best possible care for our loved ones, and for all people who have Alzheimer's. Individually, we struggle. But when we all pull together we're a formidable team.

    Thank you for joining us.

    Love,
     
  3. mocha

    mocha Registered User

    Feb 17, 2006
    176
    Lancs, England
    No Saints here Melissa,

    You've got to understand that the very thing we are doing on TP is what helps us to cope.
    I for one come on every day and join in if I want to "STICK MY OAR IN"

    Our Virtual friends are amongst the best ones we've got.

    Feel free to join in anytime. :D

    Cheers Aileen
     
  4. lizzie2596

    lizzie2596 Registered User

    Jul 3, 2007
    91
    Hi Melissa

    What you have found here is a mutual support society.

    When we are having a bad day we can write a post about it, therapeutic in itself. We then get replies from people who truly understand and it helps to put it all into perspective and get advice/support/sympathy about specific problems. I know that it has always made me feel so much better and able to keep going.

    The other side of it is to be able to offer the advice/support/sympathy to others and make them feel better. This is also a positive experience and makes me feel better about myself. I call that a win/win situation!

    Liz x
     
  5. BeckyJan

    BeckyJan Registered User

    Nov 28, 2005
    18,972
    Derbyshire
    No I am not a saint - far from it.

    Melissa, TP is a way of opening up and sharing problems, some jokes and alot of sympathy. I do hope you keep 'popping in' and sharing with us. The lovely thing is you do not need to post unless you want to but before long you feel very much part of the 'family'.

    Take care Best wishes Beckyjan
     
  6. DickG

    DickG Registered User

    Feb 26, 2006
    558
    Stow-on-the-Wold
    Hi Melissa

    Thanks for your kind words but can I swop my medal for a weeks respite care?

    Keep posting

    Dick
     
  7. Margarita

    Margarita Registered User

    Feb 17, 2006
    10,824
    london
    Dick you post always make me smile lol :D

    Could I swap mine for a all inclusive round the world cruse in 80 days , mind you would have to work out , if 80 day would take up all my entitlement of 8 weeks respite a year , take it all in one go :)

    thanks for saying that Melissa , even thought we could call ourself TP Angels like THE FILM Charles Angels :D, just that that they more then 3
     
  8. BeckyJan

    BeckyJan Registered User

    Nov 28, 2005
    18,972
    Derbyshire
    I am very greedy cos I want the medal and the respite care.
    (There you are Melissa I am not a saint).
    Beckyjan
     
  9. Gill W

    Gill W Registered User

    Jan 31, 2007
    190
    Co. Durham
    And such shall you have, Beckyjan!

    I think everyone on here does a fantastic job of caring for their loved ones, I do sometimes wonder where all the stamina comes from. If you could bottle it and sell it, I think we'd all be buying it in 5 gallon drums, wouldn't we?!

    I do agree that everyone should give themselves a pat on the back for everything they do, especially through the hard times where you feel like you least deserve it. Like when you raise your eyes skywards, grit your teeth, swear under your breath, and when you grab the nearest cushion and scream into it as hard as you can! (God, that's therapeutic, has anyone ever tried it!?!)

    Here's to TP.

    Gill
    xx
     
  10. Canadian Joanne

    Canadian Joanne Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 8, 2005
    16,152
    Toronto, Canada
    Gill,
    I've never tried screaming into a pillow but I once tried screaming in a empty lift going down 16 stories. A long time ago but boy lots of fun.
     
  11. barraf

    barraf Registered User

    Mar 27, 2004
    308
    Huddersfield
    You all deserve a medal

    Gill you do deserve a medal if you can keep your swearing under your breath.

    Mellisa none of us are saints, it is a combination of love, duty and sheer bloody mindedness that keeps most of us going, helped along by logging on to TP. Glad you joined us, stay and keep posting.

    Cheers Frank
     
  12. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    I'll have to try that one, Gill.

    I used to drive the car along a country road, and scream and scream as I was driving along. Can't do that any more because I can't leave John. The cushion might be an alternative!

    Love,
     
  13. Margarita

    Margarita Registered User

    Feb 17, 2006
    10,824
    london
    Never done that , but have sobbed my eyes out into one , but screaming will singing my heart out in concert , is the nearest I came to screaming :D thank god they was loads of people , because my singing is just no good .

    singing alone to really upbeat gospel music also does the trick
     
  14. Cliff

    Cliff Registered User

    Jun 29, 2007
    777
    North Wales
    #14 Cliff, Aug 14, 2007
    Last edited: Aug 14, 2007
    Oh Melissa,

    Your comments are very kind, but the reality is that we become carers in our own ways.

    Even though Dee is well into the Alzheimers confusion we still cuddle and laugh and that makes up for the tiredness and the frustrations. We're ordinary people who've been landed with this situation.

    Coming here to TP, allows us to realise how lucky we are with our own problems and how to enjoy an hour with people with similar or worse problems.

    Good to hear from you

    Love, Cliff

    PS I don't scream but locking the toilet door and staring at the carpet does me the world of good.
     
  15. Kate P

    Kate P Registered User

    Jul 6, 2007
    565
    Merseyside
    I've often thought that with our collective talent for compassion and creative problem solving, not to mention exceptional organisational and forward planning skills we should over throw the government and run the country - I nominate Brucie as PM as he seems to have a never ending supply of energy!!:D

    I have to say finding ways to relieve tension/anger is quite the challenge. While dealing with mum's illness and having a monumental bout of postnatal depression I'm afraid mine got took out on the doors in the house all of which now don't work properly.:eek:

    Thankfully, I've found new ways to deal with it now - my husband says when we have another baby he's going to get me a punch bag just to be on the safe side!!:D
     
  16. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    Perhaps we should have a Carers Party at the next election? Perhaps not, though. Would you like to deal with all those political know-alls?:eek:

    I'm not surprised you need a punch bag, post-natal depression on top of everything else?

    When's the baby due? I'm not sure if you've said, or if I've forgotten.
     
  17. Kate P

    Kate P Registered User

    Jul 6, 2007
    565
    Merseyside
    #17 Kate P, Aug 15, 2007
    Last edited: Aug 15, 2007
    Ah you've not slipped Hazel - I'm not yet - keep thinking about it but I don't have a good history - lost my first, second born two months early weighing 2 pounds, not to mention a spectacular bout of PND - I wonder how well I'll cope with it on top of everything else.

    I'd need lots of rest and little stress and it doesn't really come with the territory does it?

    How crazy is that? Dementia is even controlling my family plans???:eek:
     
  18. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    Kate, you poor thing. You've had so much to cope with.

    I hope you find some solutions to your parents' problems soon, and then can decide whether you want another baby. That in itself must be a hard decision to make.

    Lots of love and hugs,
     

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