Wrong husband

[Macduff]

My wife has been in hospital with a urinary infection. She's on the mend now and returning to 'normal', that is until 20.00 tonight when something triggered a switch inside her brain. For the next 75mins she went for me. I remained calm until she started accusing me of having women on the side for the last 40 years. I got really upset because this is not true and then I realised she was talking about her first hubby who was a serial womaniser. By then it was too late. I'd raised my voice and shouted 'not me'. I walked away to calm down and she sat ranting and raving about how awful I was to her. After a while I said let's get you ready for bed and she said 'I've upset you haven't I'. I said yes but I'll recover. After I'd got her to bed she kissed me and apologised. At the time I was still half way up the wall but I did my best to reassure her I was ok. I know she can't help it and doesn't mean it but sometimes I feel I'm hanging on by my finger nails. Rant over and good night!

 

[Izzy]

Oh @Macduff - just wanted to say I'm sorry you had this experience. So hard for both of you. I'm glad you were able to share here and I hope it helped - even just a little.

 

[Macduff]

Thanks Izzy. Yes it did help to get it off my chest. Thank goodness for TP. Who else would understand?

 

[Shedrech]

hi @Macduff

'I've upset you haven't I'. I said yes but I'll recover. After I'd got her to bed she kissed me and apologised.

despite all the muddle of dementia, she does still know that YOU are the RIGHT husband

 

[maryjoan]

My wife has been in hospital with a urinary infection. She's on the mend now and returning to 'normal', that is until 20.00 tonight when something triggered a switch inside her brain. For the next 75mins she went for me. I remained calm until she started accusing me of having women on the side for the last 40 years. I got really upset because this is not true and then I realised she was talking about her first hubby who was a serial womaniser. By then it was too late. I'd raised my voice and shouted 'not me'. I walked away to calm down and she sat ranting and raving about how awful I was to her. After a while I said let's get you ready for bed and she said 'I've upset you haven't I'. I said yes but I'll recover. After I'd got her to bed she kissed me and apologised. At the time I was still half way up the wall but I did my best to reassure her I was ok. I know she can't help it and doesn't mean it but sometimes I feel I'm hanging on by my finger nails. Rant over and good night![/QUOTE

Oh, I do hope you are feeling better now - but with this terrible illness, there is no 'feeling better' is there? We are all hanging on in a half world of reality - our world is not like anyone elses.

My OH insisted on mowing the lawn yesterday - sounds good - but it was the lawn of someone we hardly know across the road who was away on holiday. It took him 7 and a half hours - not sure why - I am surprised our little electric mower did not burn itself out. Now my OH is knackered.

Funny thing is, that our lawn which is quite small - still needs mowing, and he never ever does it, and I will have to do it in the next day or so!!

Take care

 

[Macduff]

Thanks maryjoan. You are right. life is indeed different for us and uniquely so for each of us.

 

[Macduff]

hi @Macduff

despite all the muddle of dementia, she does still know that YOU are the RIGHT husband

 

[Macduff]

Thank you shedrech. I get your meaning and yes, I hope that is true but I wonder if she was able to understand 'why' she upset me? Certainly she hasn't recalled it yet.