1. Expert Q&A: Benefits - Weds 23 October, 3-4pm

    Our next expert Q&A will be on the topic of benefits. It will be hosted by Lauren from our Knowledge Services team. She'll be answering your questions on Wednesday 23 October between 3-4pm.

    You can either post your question >here< or email them to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll be happy to ask them on your behalf.

  1. petesdaughter

    petesdaughter Registered User

    Feb 1, 2015
    Glasgow Scotland
    My dad has not been diagnosed with anything but we are worried sick.

    I have not read all the comments on this page but I will.

    My dad is 75 and my poor wee mum is 73. She does not keep well herself.

    My dad was always so clever, quickwitted and ahead of everyone. he has opinions on everything.

    We have noticed he keeps telling us the same things over and over. He has in a matter of months put petrol into a desiel car twice and is so distressed. My dad has been a driver most of his life. Forgets where he is going. What he is doing an where he is going. This is all new to us, my mum has been hiding stuff from us. She is now beside herself and needs help too because she is not well but she wont leave my dad.

    What I need to know is how do we get him to be tested properly?

    how do we convince him he needs to do this? I know he knows he forgets things. I cannot bear to think of my daddy going down this road. Not when he was/is so vocal on so many things.

    But there is a big problem and it needs to be addressed without humiliating him

    HELP please
  2. brambles

    brambles Registered User

    Sep 22, 2014
    NW England
    Hi petesdaughter,

    I am sorry you are so worried about your dad and can understand your concerns.

    To get a diagnosis you need dad to see his gp and they will give him a short memory test, then refer him to the memory clinic for full testing.

    It is a good idea to keep a diary of your dads issues to give to the gp when you see him.

    If you cannot persuade your dad to go to the gp (with you or your mum) then maybe ring or email his GP with your concerns, Some will be prepared to call your dad in for a well man check, but if not at least they will be aware of the issues when they next see him.

    I know this is a big worry and it was years from first noticing my mums problems to actually getting her diagnosed.

    Remind your dad that there is medication that might help him.

    Best of luck

    brambles x
  3. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    Let your dad's gp know about your concerns. For whatever reason your father has another appointment, hopefully they will bring it up and do a simple test. For me, mum's blood pressure medication needed reviewing and an appointment was made, that was our way in to talk about other problems. Whether your father admits to things is another bridge to cross.
  4. Linbrusco

    Linbrusco Registered User

    Mar 4, 2013
    Auckland...... New Zealand
    I find with my Dad who has cognitive impairment, if I was to suggest anything as far as seeing his doctor he would say everything is fine.
    So, occasionally I have to go behind his back and ring our practice nurse with any concerns.
    They call Dad with some pretense of something or another and as it his GP saying he wants to see him, he accepts without question and agrees to go.
    That was when his GP did a memory tests, and then a referral to the Memory Clinic.

    With Mum with AD she agrees to anything at this stage.
  5. kaycee30

    kaycee30 Registered User

    Feb 4, 2015
    its not all bad

    Hi, am sorry to hear of your worries, contacting the GP by telephone or letter is the best way forward, the GP may be unable to talk to you About you father however you can express your concerns. I also Worry about the driving situation if there are concerns for his or others safety you need to consider limiting his car use.
    Its not all bad, medication can slow the disease and there are services/organisations that can help, support and assist people with dementia and their family carers. Your mum doesnt have to cope alon7e (although I appreciate you are supporting), perhaps worth GP checking Mum over too, if she becomes unwell could make matters harder.
    best of luck x

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