Worried about John

blue sea

Registered User
Aug 24, 2005
270
England
Dear Hazel
Do you have an answer phone? If not, worth considering, then you can listen to the messages and answer only when you feel ready. No wonder you feel low at the moment - you have had a series of crises and big changes in your circumstances with John's care and are bound to be feeling the reaction. Try to take some time out for yourself. ( A 'duvet day' with a box of chocolates, some wine and 'Brief Encounter' would be my choice.)
Thinking of you
Blue sea
 

gigi

Registered User
Nov 16, 2007
7,788
67
East Midlands
catching up

Hazel- thoughts and prayers with you and John. Blue seas idea of a duvet day is wonderful(wouldn't mind that myself at the moment!) I'd go for " Sleepless in Seattle" every time(or you could try Miracle on 34th Street!):D Lots of love Gigi x
 

Skye

Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
17,000
SW Scotland
A duvet day sounds wonderful. Better than cleaning windows, anyway! I don't want to miss feeding John lunch, though, but might 'retire' when I get home, if he's OK. Might even give Skye a treat and let her join me.

Pigging out at the moment on roasted cashews 'tumbled in maple syrup and cream liqueur'! Yum!

Got a Christmas hamper today from no 3 son -- it's not going to see Christmas!

I feel better -- and fatter -- already!

Love,
 

BeckyJan

Registered User
Nov 28, 2005
18,972
Derbyshire
Oh dear Skye - I think I am in sympathy with you. Pigging out on wine, cashew nuts (bought for family at Christmas!!!?) and I also have tremendous neck pain. Due for acupuncture on Friday (whoops never experienced that before).

Now I have guilt complex as I am making light of how I feel - and I KNOW that compared with John's situation that is just not fair.

I wish I had a magic wand - then I could put all the problems on TP to rights.

Thoughts are with you. Take care Skye Love Jan
 

Skye

Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
17,000
SW Scotland
Don't feel guilty about making light of things, Jan. There's enough doom and gloom around, and a chat with friends always helps.

I used to have acupuncture for my neck, but it didn't help. I found that having to lie on my face for 15 mins when the needles were in put extra stress on my neck muscles, and I came out worse than I went in!

Some acupuncturists will do it while you're sitting down, but then you've got the problem of sitting for 15 min with your head unsupported -- equally bad!

I'd ask about that before you have your treatment. It's quite a while since I tried it, and there may be better techniques now.

Love,
 

Kayla

Registered User
May 14, 2006
621
Kent
Dear Hazel,
I'm sorry to hear that John is still so poorly and there has been such a marked decline since July.
My Mum seemed to go down suddenly and then pick up a little each time, before the next step down. It's very distressing to see and to be so powerless to help.
My thoughts are with you and John at this time. It is good that he is being well care for in the NH.
I hope things will improve for you both and you will soon feel better.

Kayla
 

Skye

Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
17,000
SW Scotland
We now have a new problem. John has made a huge blister covering the ball of his heel, apparently by rubbing it up and down on the sheet in bed. It has been burst, and they are dressing it twice a day, but it is not healing. They're going to ring the GP again in the morning.

So now he's in a wheelchair, and in considerable pain. I wonder if he'll get his mobility back, he was unsteady enough before. :(
 

jenniferpa

Registered User
Jun 27, 2006
39,448
Dear Hazel, I am sorry to hear this. When you say it's not healing - how long has it been? I ask because even in the well, blisters (particularly the ones that have lost their skin covering) can take a surprisingly long time to heal. Not that you want to take a watch and see approach under the circumstances and it's good that the NH is on top of it, just that this "may" be something that simply requires time.
 

connie

Registered User
Mar 7, 2004
9,519
Frinton-on-Sea
Hazel dear, feel so sorry for John. Blisters can be so painful.

When I had the carer helping Lionel at home last year she got me into the habit of creaming his heels when putting him into bed at night. She also paid particular attention to them before dressing him in the morning.

They are a form of pressure sore. I am sure the home will soon have him eased of pain, and hopefully his heel will heal.

(I regularly do Lionel feet whenever I visit him. As good as the care is there I sometimes think the little things can be overlooked)
 

Skye

Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
17,000
SW Scotland
Thanks, folks Jennifer, it's four days now, and they're quite worried about it, because it's still 'weeping' badly. They're taking great care with it, and have kept me informed right from the start, which pleases me. But it's upsetting to see him in a wheelchair for the first time.

They're hoping to get through to the GP to get some specific ointment before everything closes down.
 

fearful fiona

Registered User
Apr 19, 2007
723
73
London
Dear Hazel,

So sorry to read about this latest problem. Hope they manage to sort John's blister out asap. Also sorry that you have to see him in a wheelchair.

My thoughts are with you as ever.

Much love
 

Skye

Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
17,000
SW Scotland
I went in for 11 o'clock this morning. Nicky Spence was coming in to sing for the residents. He's aiming to get round every care home in the area (24) and hospital ward, and collecting for Age Concern. What a lovely young man -- good singer too!

Anyway, when I arrived at 10.45 the district nurse had already been and dressed the wound. She prescribed Allevyn heel pads, which they are getting.

John was much brighter today, and I was able to wheel him to the main lounge to hear the singing. I'm going back to feed him tea, as I did yesterday, but I feel a bit happier today. He's got the jerks back, but I don't know if they're myoclonics, or reactions to spasms of pain.

Now I've got to start knitting! I can't find anything that will fit over his dressings. I haven't knitted socks for years, I used to knit my father's, he had rheumatoid artritis and could only wear pure wool. He died 20 years ago -- can I remember? How to knit socks, that is. I'll never forget my dad.

Thanks for caring.

Love,
 

okmurrays

Registered User
Oct 17, 2007
118
58
kelowna, bc, canada
Oh Skye, thinking of you and wishing you and John well.

Knitting socks? That should keep you busy, I think I would struggle with the heels....

Hope things pick up for you, keep strong.


Sharon
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
71,827
Kent
I`m glad to hear John`s a bit better Hazel. That`s good really, considering.
Good luck with the socks.
Love xx
 

gigi

Registered User
Nov 16, 2007
7,788
67
East Midlands
Hazel-sorry to hear about John's latest problem.
It does sound like a form of pressure sore.
In the good old days we used to have sheepskin heel muffs specifically designed to stop this happening and they really worked.
Maybe the home could acquire some-or maybe they've fallen from favour. Or anything to keep the heels from the shearing effect of skin against bed clothes. Even a sheepskin cover on the bottom sheet where his feet are.
Until you get the socks knitted...
God bless and hope you have some peace and happiness tomorrow. Love Gigi xx
 

Skye

Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
17,000
SW Scotland
The bad news is, John now has a blister on his other heel! It's not pressure, it's abrasion. He digs his heels in when he wants to alter his position. They now think it's when he's sitting in a chair, rather than in bed. He slides down, then tries to push himself up again.

The good news is that he was more awake than usual today, and enjoyed his lunch (so did I). I've come home to see to Skye while he has his afternoon nap, then I'll go back later.

This is us with Santa:
 
Last edited:

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
71,827
Kent
It`s a lovely photo Hazel, but no denying the deterioration in John. I can only imagine your pain.

About his sliding down the chair. You can buy a wedge shaped pad, we had one in the car. If it was placed thin edge to the back of the chair, so his bottom was lower than his knees, do you think it might stop John sliding off?

Love xx
 

Skye

Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
17,000
SW Scotland
It`s a lovely photo Hazel, but no denying the deterioration in John. I can only imagine your pain.

About his sliding down the chair. You can buy a wedge shaped pad, we had one in the car. If it was placed thin edge to the back of the chair, so his bottom was lower than his knees, do you think it might stop John sliding off?

Love xx

Worth a try, Sylvia, thanks. Where did you get it?

Following Gigi's suggestion, I've taken in a sheepskin pad that I got for Skye when she had her 'snip'. They're going to try putting it on the floor under his feet. They've tried a stool, and cushions, but he just kicks them out of the way. The wedge sounds like a good idea.

The trouble is, John's so tall, he just can't get comfortable in a chair. I'm waiting till after Christmas, then I'll talk to them about getting him a recliner. He no longer tries to get up on his own, so it shouldn't be a problem.

Aren't there always problems!