I was filled with dread today at the thought of the morning review of Ken by his consultant. Such meetings have always left me in the depths of despair because his behaviour was so problematic and difficult to control and the only place where he could have staff with the ability to control him was on the ward at the hospital. I went with Ken's brother and my son for support to the meeting
This time I let the consultant do all the talking as I had nothing more that I could have said. She knew how desperately I had been pushing to get Ken into a more suitable environment. She said that Ken had stabalised out these last few months. Also that the ward was a dangerous place for him in view of the new people who have arrived and who are violent and volatile (he was hit only last week). He just hasn't the social skills to be able to cope and is vulnerable on the ward. She thought that it would now be possible to let him go to the home which I originally begged her to send him to!!! She also said that her decision had been swayed by the amount of help and input I had made over the months with Ken to stabalise him.
I was absolutely THRILLED!!! I did mention the new home in our area which is being built and that I had made enquiries about it but I would rather Ken went to the first home, my original choice. It is well established, so will not have the teething troubles the new one might have and has only 20 beds rather than the 32 in the new home, and it has a very nice, family feeling to it. We left the hospital with Ken and went immediately to visit the home as son and BIL might not have the opportunity to see it again before Ken moves there. They both live a distance away and son had taken the day off work to be with me. So we arrived, quite unannounced at about 11.30 am. It has a warm and friendly atmosphere with residents treated very pleasantly and the staff remembered Ken from the few days he spent there last year when our daughter in law died and he was in respite care. They all remembered his name and fussed him a little! It is furnished and decorated well. Above all, it smelled and looked clean and fresh!! The residents who we chatted to were very clean, relaxed and comfortable. I had eaten a meal there with Ken last year and know that the food is well prepared and well served in a pretty dining room with plenty of natural light. I nearly cried when I saw the lovely single bedrooms; we visited at least three and they were all very clean and had lots of personal articles to make them a place wheere residents would feel it was their own special space. Bathrooms and toilets were spotless!!
It may take some time for him to get a bed and will not be happening very quickly I don't suppose. But with news such as this I feel on top of the world!
Of course, he still will have a terrible time settling in and his stress levels may bring on his delusions again but the consultant said that she was prepared to take the risk at this point in his care. She also said that if it did not work out then they would of course have him back on the ward. God Forbid!! The staff on the ward do their very best for the patients but it is a sterile, unloving hospital ward with no pretence of being anything like a comfortable home.
If I have to be at his new care home 10 hours a day for the first few months until he feels settled, then I will. I will move heaven and earth to make him happy there!!
The bedrooms are lovely and I will be able to personalise his room and put a tv and radio in (moastly for when I am there with him rather than for Ken - he never watches tv or listens to the radio)
Wonderful, Wonderful news which I am so very happy to share with all the many, lovely people who have offered me support over the last several bleak and terrifying months.xxx Tina
This time I let the consultant do all the talking as I had nothing more that I could have said. She knew how desperately I had been pushing to get Ken into a more suitable environment. She said that Ken had stabalised out these last few months. Also that the ward was a dangerous place for him in view of the new people who have arrived and who are violent and volatile (he was hit only last week). He just hasn't the social skills to be able to cope and is vulnerable on the ward. She thought that it would now be possible to let him go to the home which I originally begged her to send him to!!! She also said that her decision had been swayed by the amount of help and input I had made over the months with Ken to stabalise him.
I was absolutely THRILLED!!! I did mention the new home in our area which is being built and that I had made enquiries about it but I would rather Ken went to the first home, my original choice. It is well established, so will not have the teething troubles the new one might have and has only 20 beds rather than the 32 in the new home, and it has a very nice, family feeling to it. We left the hospital with Ken and went immediately to visit the home as son and BIL might not have the opportunity to see it again before Ken moves there. They both live a distance away and son had taken the day off work to be with me. So we arrived, quite unannounced at about 11.30 am. It has a warm and friendly atmosphere with residents treated very pleasantly and the staff remembered Ken from the few days he spent there last year when our daughter in law died and he was in respite care. They all remembered his name and fussed him a little! It is furnished and decorated well. Above all, it smelled and looked clean and fresh!! The residents who we chatted to were very clean, relaxed and comfortable. I had eaten a meal there with Ken last year and know that the food is well prepared and well served in a pretty dining room with plenty of natural light. I nearly cried when I saw the lovely single bedrooms; we visited at least three and they were all very clean and had lots of personal articles to make them a place wheere residents would feel it was their own special space. Bathrooms and toilets were spotless!!
It may take some time for him to get a bed and will not be happening very quickly I don't suppose. But with news such as this I feel on top of the world!
Of course, he still will have a terrible time settling in and his stress levels may bring on his delusions again but the consultant said that she was prepared to take the risk at this point in his care. She also said that if it did not work out then they would of course have him back on the ward. God Forbid!! The staff on the ward do their very best for the patients but it is a sterile, unloving hospital ward with no pretence of being anything like a comfortable home.
If I have to be at his new care home 10 hours a day for the first few months until he feels settled, then I will. I will move heaven and earth to make him happy there!!
The bedrooms are lovely and I will be able to personalise his room and put a tv and radio in (moastly for when I am there with him rather than for Ken - he never watches tv or listens to the radio)
Wonderful, Wonderful news which I am so very happy to share with all the many, lovely people who have offered me support over the last several bleak and terrifying months.xxx Tina