Hi everyone.
As you all know, Dad passed away in August, and this is going to be our first Christmas without him.
Mum is so much better after taking the anti depresent tablets. They are a low dosage, but they have helped her so much. She is much happier and getting out and doing lots. She has had two Christmas parties this week. Has had my uncle and aunt over, and tomorrow she is getting on the bus to spend the day with her friend. Mum is just wonderful, still forgetting everything, and writing everything down, but she is so wonderful and I love her so much.
She is with my Sister Christmas Day, and with me and my husband and our three boys on Boxing Day, staying the night, and then I will take her back the following day at some point. She will then come over to us on the 29th and stay the night.
I just find it so hard. I miss Dad so much. I talk to my husband about it, and he is great, but he lost his mum last year and all memories come back for both of us (his mum was very special to me), sometimes I feel I can't talk because I don't want to upset anyone. (I am supposed to be the strong one and the person that copes with everything and is there for everyone - this is what all my friends and family say). I feel like I am being selfish because I hurt so much. Everyone says how strong I am, and how I can cope with anything - maybe I do on the surface, but I hurt.
I feel guilty that Mum will have about two days on her own over Christmas, but I need some time on my own with my husband and the boys.
I am sorry, I just needed to talk and explain how I feel.
Love Michele
As you all know, Dad passed away in August, and this is going to be our first Christmas without him.
Mum is so much better after taking the anti depresent tablets. They are a low dosage, but they have helped her so much. She is much happier and getting out and doing lots. She has had two Christmas parties this week. Has had my uncle and aunt over, and tomorrow she is getting on the bus to spend the day with her friend. Mum is just wonderful, still forgetting everything, and writing everything down, but she is so wonderful and I love her so much.
She is with my Sister Christmas Day, and with me and my husband and our three boys on Boxing Day, staying the night, and then I will take her back the following day at some point. She will then come over to us on the 29th and stay the night.
I just find it so hard. I miss Dad so much. I talk to my husband about it, and he is great, but he lost his mum last year and all memories come back for both of us (his mum was very special to me), sometimes I feel I can't talk because I don't want to upset anyone. (I am supposed to be the strong one and the person that copes with everything and is there for everyone - this is what all my friends and family say). I feel like I am being selfish because I hurt so much. Everyone says how strong I am, and how I can cope with anything - maybe I do on the surface, but I hurt.
I feel guilty that Mum will have about two days on her own over Christmas, but I need some time on my own with my husband and the boys.
I am sorry, I just needed to talk and explain how I feel.
Love Michele