Who will care if I can't

[Agzy]

I'd love to know what is being planned to look after people who still live alone but rely on daily care visits from family. My mums needs someone to do her shopping and cook a meal for her each day at the very least. We have recently started using carers three days a week to give us a break but they have said they cannot increase that during this crisis. So if me or my sister become ill or have to be isolated, there is a risk of mum not eating regularly. She gets much more anxious and confused if she does not see someone for a few hours a day, just popping in is not very helpful. The idea of leaving food on her doorstep is laughable, she confuses where to store food, often its crisps and biscuits in the fridge and milk and meat in the lounge cupboard!

And she is running out of toilet rolls and I have not found a shop with any!

IAs I see it many of the low paid community carers have families who could get infected and also themselves and so may well need to go off sick or resign. Either way the ranks of community carers will be reduced and it will fall on us to cope and, to be honest I can’t see any other options.

 

[Lynmax]

Toilet roll update! All my local shops have sold out but I've ordered a pack of 48 from an online office supply company. Delivery costs were a bit steep but I'm splitting the pach between my mother and myself so worth it. Physically I cannot walk far so shopping around is not really an option for me.

Mum has an upset tummy at the moment so we need a good stock!

On a more serious note, I've emailed my MP and also my mums with my concerns, asking them what contingency plans the Gvt have for elderly dementia people who live alone and rely on daily visits. Hopefully at least one of them will respond. My mums MP is a local guy who is reportedly very active in his constituency whereas mine is somewhat distant! I'll let you know if I hear anything.

 

[White Rose]

@White Rose, Never heard of them so looked out of interest and they are sold out!

Oh dear, might have guessed. Well some companies are making money out of the crisis though!

 

[jenniferjean]

IAs I see it many of the low paid community carers have families who could get infected and also themselves and so may well need to go off sick or resign. Either way the ranks of community carers will be reduced and it will fall on us to cope and, to be honest I can’t see any other options.

That is true. I was wondering about my Take-a-Break on Tuesday but I think I'll phone tomorrow and if they haven't already cancelled then I will. There will be a shortage of carers and there will be a need more for those on their own. Anyway, where could I go?

 

[Katiekunzle]

Hi all. I care for my 88 year old Mum, who is pretty much housebound anyway unless I take her out. This situation is such a worry - Mum lives four miles away and I do all the caring for her on a daily basis - food, medication, cleaning, appointments etc. I am terrified that I won't be able to get to her because either I have the virus or everyone is quarantined. To make matters worse, my husband, who helps me out sometimes with Mum is 73 and in a high risk group because of his own medical problems. I'm already run ragged between two houses and if he has to be isolated there'll only be me. At the moment I'm fit and well, but I'm 66 and if they decide to change the age-bracket for quarantine to over 65, I'm doomed! I've been trying to get Social Services involved for five weeks now because of Mum's ongoing needs, and all they can say is that they haven't allocated a social worker yet. I know they're busy but that just isn't good enough, and the impact of the virus is only going to make things worse. No-one seems to know what is going to happen with people like us carers, I don't think they even understand the issues. If I didn't look after Mum she wouldn't eat, she'd take all her medication wrong, her depression would get worse if she had no contact with me, the list goes on . . . Just who is going to pick this up and help us all?

 

[yorkie46]

Don't know if any help but I heard that Farm foods shops have toilet rolls. Luckily this isn't a problem area for me at the moment.
I do however have to make a decision about something else. Our grandson has a cold and I usually take him to school and collect him on Tuesday and he has tea with us. Do I say he can't come to see grandad or do I say well it's just a cold it will be ok.? At the moment I'm saying let's see how he is tomorrow. He's actually find in himself and has been doing various weekend activities. Luckily if I say no to him coming there is no problem over childcare because his dad can cover it. I don't therefore feel pressured and my daughter says she will quite understand if I say if rather he doesn't come this week.

 

[yorkie46]

Does anyone know the answer to this? If we are told to have no contact with other people is there any reason why we couldn't go out in our own car to some remote spot, stay in the car with the windows open to get some much needed fresh air and if nobody around stretch our legs. I also thought we could take a picnic to eat in the car. It would just help the monotony of the constant TV and the same four walls!

 

[Banjomansmate]

If I have to self isolate for several weeks or months just because of my age , then I intend walking my dogs at quiet times or in quiet places where I am unlikely to see many people and can avoid the ones I do see. We are told that a brisk walk every day is supposed to do us so much good both physically and mentally and with the better weather finally coming (I hope) I intend making the most of whatever sunshine we get!
Apparently touching is the taboo so I cannot see how getting some fresh air is going to increase my risk of catching the virus.

 

[PalSal]

If my husband or I contract the virus we will both get it. He has never agreed to separate beds so being sick would not change his habits. I would be impossible to isolate him within the house.
I imagine we would die, as if I cannot care for him he can do nothing for himself .....not even turn on the taps for water. I am not sure what the authorities would do for us....as the current directions are if you are ill you must isolate at home.
One of our carers went to the store and apotheke for us on Saturday left everything outside on the porch. Friends have reached out to offering to go to the store.
We are in isolation....not completely but limiting contact with others. As currently we are both healthy, I am still taking him on long walks in the countryside for nature and fresh air.
Sadly, I fear we must think in terms of months of isolation rather than weeks......but we can do it one day at a time.
We have been one week in isolation because of my leukemia.....but at the moment I am still sending him to his daycare as long as it is open.

 

[Vitesse]

If I have to self isolate for several weeks or months just because of my age , then I intend walking my dogs at quiet times or in quiet places where I am unlikely to see many people and can avoid the ones I do see. We are told that a brisk walk every day is supposed to do us so much good both physically and mentally and with the better weather finally coming (I hope) I intend making the most of whatever sunshine we get!
Apparently touching is the taboo so I cannot see how getting some fresh air is going to increase my risk of catching the virus.

Surely, going for walks can’t put us in any danger. We live on the coast, how could walking on the promenade cause a problem to any one, if we avoid close contact with passers by? I am concerned, of course, because I am my husbands sole carer, so we cannot self isolate, we can only isolate as Siamese twins would!!!! On a serious note, just like others have said, if I get it, I fear for my husband who has AD. some days he can just about dress himself, others are a lost cause. We don’t have any carers coming in, it’s all down to me.

 

[PalSal]

No more daycare....one more resource ended for the time being.

 

[meat]

We have children but they really didn't understand until I had to go out of town and my son had to stay with him for 2 days. By the time I returned he kept telling me he kept jumping up because he was up really late watching tv and eating. I said sarcastically, really! But I still don't get to much help. I have a daughter, she is in her own little world and don't seem to be to concerned about me. She says I am a very dutiful wife I tell her I have to do the best for him because staying at hospital especially now because the coronavirius...plus my heart would not compel me to do anything else.
Hang in there we all will pray for each other