Hello all. Today is one of those days where I just feel like I can't be bothered. I'm fed up with my husband, fed up being told I'm not me, fed up with being politely asked to leave the house so his wife can come home, fed up with spending all day with him, fed up with arguments (he NEVER thinks I'm somebody else when we're having an argument, and he is sometimes the same bad-tempered, domineering man I've always known that he can be), fed up with waiting for the GP to ring and do something. There is no way here in the US I can call and speak to the doctor directly, which I could only do when I'm out of the house anyway, which I hardly ever can be. Or when he's out of the house, which is even rarer.
I should feel blessed. Our son was here over the weekend, and was wonderful to be with. His dad enjoyed his company, I enjoyed his company, we enjoyed his company together, but now he's gone again. And it's up to me to carry on with struggling towards a diagnosis, trying to help my husband with his business, trying to manage our business, which is not here but in France, trying to negotiate a health system here which I don't understand and which is quite alien to me.
And I know I'm not having to deal with half of what you others are having to deal with. I'm looking for the silver lining, and today it's all grey.
Sorry about the self-pitying rant, but it's ok to do that here, isn't it?
I should feel blessed. Our son was here over the weekend, and was wonderful to be with. His dad enjoyed his company, I enjoyed his company, we enjoyed his company together, but now he's gone again. And it's up to me to carry on with struggling towards a diagnosis, trying to help my husband with his business, trying to manage our business, which is not here but in France, trying to negotiate a health system here which I don't understand and which is quite alien to me.
And I know I'm not having to deal with half of what you others are having to deal with. I'm looking for the silver lining, and today it's all grey.
Sorry about the self-pitying rant, but it's ok to do that here, isn't it?