Thanks
@Sarasa @Bikerbeth xx We went and we survived, got to wait and see what's said on phone consultation next wednesday now.
Mum didn't react well as predicted. She heard phone beep when hubby text to say he was on his way, I'd turned it up so she would so I could bring up appointment. Mum asked if that was my phone, I told her it was hubby saying he's setting off now. She asked if he was picking me and I was going home now and I said No he's coming to pick us up for her eye appointment. Mum said What eye appointment? and when I told her had appointment at 'city' today she said she wasn't going there and she'd not got appointment. I told her she had and that's the letter she read earlier and as expected mum said she wasn't going. I told her she had to, they were expecting her and it was too late not to go now.
She set off then that she hadn't agreed to appointment, she hadn't made one, she didn't want to go and she wasn't going, it was too bloody far to 'city' and she hated 'city' hospital. I just kept saying she did know, she'd read letter earlier and had told DR he could refer her last time. She went to get letter and told me as 'friend' I shouldn't have done that and made her appointment, I had no right and it wasn't up to me. I told her I hadn't done it, she had told consultant at last appointment he could refer her, she had done it not me. She said Well I'm not going! I said You've got to it's too late not to go now you said you would go to DR at 'town' hospital.
That argument wasn't working so she switched to What time is it? when I told her 4.30 she said she couldn't go cos needed to wash her hair, and I'd have to cancel. I told her I wasn't cancelling, she'd said she'd go and we had to go and her hair was fine. Mum said she needed to get washed and changed and we wouldn't get to 'city' in time. I told her -(hubby) was coming and taking us in car so we had plenty of time and she had half an hour to get ready before we needed to set off. Mum asked who - was. I told her he was my husband and she said she didn't know him. I said she would when saw him.
Mum said she didn't want to go, she was too old to have operations and she hated 'city and wasn't having it done. I told her we had to go today cos it was booked so we'd go and see, they might not say they'd do op anyway. She had got up by this point and went in bathroom to get washed, she popped back out and said Why didn't you tell me earlier? I fibbed and said I thought she knew it was today, letter came earlier and I thought she knew it was today. Mum said she hadn't noticed day and didn't know going today so I just said Oh sorry I thought you did.
She went back in bathroom and then bedroom to get changed all the time moaning about having to go, she's not having op, we wouldn't get there in time and also saying she needed go loo, which she always does when going somewhere. I got ready in between her bathroom trips and when hubby arrived mum was still going on but her steam was running out. Mum was calling me 'friend' so hubby called me Andie and mum said That's not our Andie which changed subject from hospital to if I was me or not and ten minutes passed talking about that and then it was time to go. Mum got in car ok just saying quite a few times on way it was long way to city and we'd not be on time and also asking on and off if I was our Andie etc.
We were a bit early so sat in car for bit then we put on our masks, I told mum not to touch mask, and stay near me and we set off out of car park leaving hubby in car reading. We got stuck in car park going round in a loop trying to find exit as all the exit signs seemed to go round in a circle and I'd missed the one at the beginning telling us to go up, we'd gone down instead.? It got us a bit hot and bothered before we made it back to where started and then out of car park and across to hospital. We had to wait in entrance and a young male nurse asked if had appointment and who it was for so I said Mum but I'll need to go with her and mum said Or I'll get lost. He looked a bit surprised but didn't say I couldn't go in. He asked who here to see and if we'd had any symptoms and then another showed us in, we had to stop and wash our hands before going into waiting area.
When we sat down mum kept fiddling with her mask cos her glasses were steaming up and it was making her hot. I kept telling her to leave it alone, not to touch it and she kept saying I'm not! She said I'll take it off for bit cos I'm hot but I told her she couldn't this is where she had to wear it most when we were inside. So she told me I was a pain.
I suggested she took glasses off for bit and then nurse called her for vision test and she had put them back on. As they'd misted up nurse said she could put it below her nose for minute. while she was at other side of room.
I was surprised when she asked mum to confirm first line of her address and date of birth and mum answered straight away when this morning she'd been asking me where is this house and whats this street called. ? After vision test we went to machine for pressure test and then nurse sent us to imaging part to wait there. It was really a corridor with seats and was quite busy but we managed get seat at end.
At first mum was moaning about mask again and fiddling with it and saying I'm not,
when I told her not to touch it but eventually she settled down. She kept asking if I was married to hubby and how long for and if I'd been married before and did she come to wedding. I tried distracting her talking about other things but she did keep coming back to asking and also kept saying we've been here ages I bet she's gone for her tea quite a lot too.
We did have a few laughs though, I said let's play eye spy and said something beginning with M. Mum said MOTHER quite loudly which made people turn and look at us, we laughed cos it was funny and then mum said Is it? I said No, so mum said I don't know what it is then tell me. I said Masks and she groaned which set us off laughing again. On one of mums moans about wearing a mask I said Does my nose look big in this and mum said Aye! which made us laugh and got us a few more looks. Then a bit later mum said I want to poop, I said Its probably nerves and mum said Yep but it's ok nobody will be able to smell it cos these masks will filter it, I burst out laughing making everybody look again. What with the laughing, mum asking about who I was married to etc 1/2 a dozen times and her saying we've been here ages I bet she'd gone for her tea a good dozen if not more times, I think we'll have given a good impression of ourselves to other patients today won't we lol, especially if any of them had also seen us going round and round car park too
?
After 3/4's of an hour mum was called but I couldn't go in as too small a room but after ten minutes and 3 machines they came out and we all went to another bigger room I was allowed in for another machine. After using that nurse told us we could go now, the DR would look at images and decide if could do op and be in touch to talk to us about it.
We got back to mums about 1/4 past 6 and I made us some dinner. Mum thought I was 'friend' for a bit, one of the times she called me 'friend' hubby said my name and mum said She knows I mean her cos she's my daughter and from then until we left 3/4s of an hour later she called me Andrea or Andie and knew who I was.
It must not have lasted though as mum rang me about 1/4 past 9 and asked if I'd been to hospital with her today. I said I had, Hubby had come and drove us there and I went in with her, she said Oh good, and did we call for something to eat after? I said We went back to yours and I made us some dinner, and told her what we'd had. Mum said Oh yes we did, That's alright then I was just wondering who I had been to hospital with if it was Andrea or .... her who comes to my house sometimes erm... While she was trying to think of who she thought it had been I said again No it was me mum and hubby drove us. Mum said Ok, that's good, thank you love. Al see you later, I said See you tomorrow and then she said Bye and hung up. She didn't sound upset or angry on phone but she sounded a bit quiet when she said bye at end. I hope she is ok now. ?
Once we got over the I'm not going and got mum out of the house, she wasn't too bad at hospital, apart from bit of grumpy petulant teenager-ness over mask and quite a bit of repeating. Just the phone consultation to do next week and then see what they say?