An up and down one, not too bad up to last post
@Bikerbeth but not so good after
When I rang mum this morning mum said happy birthday, I said thanks but told her it's tomorrow and then mum told me she'd got me a card but it was one she already had because W (my dad) had left and she'd come to live here and was up to her eyeballs in it and didn't know what she had to do about her rent she was trying work it out. I told her rent was all sorted and she got housing benefit we'd sorted it when she moved in so she didn't need to worry. Mum said Oh thats one less thing then thanks. I told her I was setting off and I'd see her soon, she said ok love.
Mum said Happy birthday again when I arrived and when I said its tomorrow she said Oh right, I've got you a card here are you going to take it home for then, so I said yes and thank you. I don't know how she had remembered my birthday (even though day early) as I haven't mentioned it and she hasn't either till this morning.
She's asked questions quite a few times during the day, starting from when I arrived up to when I left, about her rent, how long lived there, where W was, where our Andie is, thought she had lived there before then got back with dad and lived with him then come back here a few week ago, all her usual mix ups. She has called me 'friend' most of day and ask me lots of times if our Andrea knows where she lives, and wondered if our Andrea would come sometime to see her and told me she's surprised our Andrea doesn't come as they'd always been close. Mixed in with lots of are you our Andrea? are you my daughter? how old are you? I didn't think our andrea was that old, is our Andrea married, does our Andrea have a house, where is it, have I been? But although there has been lots of questions and she forgets almost straight away what I say and sometimes doesn't even take in what I say it's been an average not too bad a day as mums not got upset or angry or too agitated.
She rang me a bit after I got home to ask if I was going to see her tomorrow as she couldn't remember if she'd asked me or not. I told her yes I'd be back tomorrow I'd go in morning and she said good, then she asked if I'd been there today and I said yes. Mum said she hadn't seen me, was I sure? I said yes and mum said she didn't know that, how long had I been there? I told her I'd gone about half ten and that I'd not long been home. Mum asked What did we do? so I told her we'd knitted, watched tele, chatted and what we'd had to eat and mum said she didn't know that, wasn't she stupid, I said she wasn't and not to worry about it. Mum said well thank you for coming, will you come tomorrow? I said yes in the morning and mum said Yes come in morning cos I'm brighter in the morning. I said why do you glow, do you shine like the sun, will I need my sunglasses? and mum laughed which I hoped she would. She said I do love you Andie and I told her I loved her. She said I'll see you tomorrow then, I said She would and reminded her repair shop was on at 8 and we said bye.
Mum sounded ok when we hung up and I hoped that she'd be ok rest of night, but then mum rang me again about 20 past 9 confused. She said My mum hasn't come back and I don't know where W (my dad) is so I'm going to have to sleep here.
She seemed to think she was in her mums house, she had gone to see her mum but she hadn't come back yet. She thought my dad had been there at her mums house with her earlier but then gone so she'd have to go back up to their house on her own, she thought she lived in house we lived in when her and dad lived when split up almost 30 year ago. She thought her mum had been on holiday, her brother had been there earlier and told her that and so mum was waiting for her mum to come back but she hadn't yet. She didn't know if her mum had a key so she couldn't go home cos her mum might not be able to get in.
She was surprised to know it was her house she was in and was sure she still lived in our old house with dad, she didn't know we'd been to hers today and was bit worried she didn't know where she was and she didn't know what was happening. She said it was her mums house she was in and so I described furniture and mum said that was where she was but it was her mums stuff. She kept going back to it being her mums house and her mum was coming back from holiday so mum couldn't go home yet and sounded really confused. I tried to reassure her she was just bit mixed up cos tired and she was in right place but a second after I'd tell her something she'd ask something or tell me something else mixed up like she didn't have any clothes there. After we'd been on about ten minutes she had agreed to stay there and not go anywhere else and then she told me she couldn't get tele on. I'd left her watching last of the summer wine when we left hers at 20 past 7 so I'm not sure why it was turned off but maybe she had turned it off and unplugged it cos she thought she was going home, she didn't know why it was off. I told her how to plug it in but mum couldn't get it off standby. I told her which button to press to get it off standby but she couldn't get it to come on, her tele can be a pain, it's a standing joke it's a faff you have to wave remote about near tv to get it to come on. Mum kept trying to do it but the back came off battery compartment and she couldn't get it to work. I think maybe batteries might be going as it has took couple of attempts today to change channel, I so wish I'd thought to change batteries while I was there today. I offered to go over and try get it to turn on for her but mum said no she'd just turn it off. I told her I'd look at it tomorrow and change batteries.
We'd spent 10 minutes with her trying to get tv on and in between attempts she kept talking about her mum coming back and her thinking she didn't live there. I asked her what she would do if turned tele off and mum said she didn't know. I suggested maybe she did her puzzles or read and mum said she couldn't really do them now so I suggested colouring and she said maybe she would. She asked again why she didn't know it was her house, she was sure she lived in --(where our old house was) I told her it's just when her brain gets tired it remembers old memories, try not to worry about it too much as she'll only get more confused, Mum said Ok. I said You're in right place so don't go anywhere else, stay there and sleep there tonight and I'll come tomorrow morning is that ok? Mum said Ok I'll sleep here, I've got a bed. She said she'd see me tomorrow and we said night.
I didn't know if I should have gone over or if that might make things worse as then I'd have to leave again later so I didn't go, but I was worried about her staying there all mixed up and I'm still feeling guilty for not going over. I hope she settled down and stopped thinking she lived somewhere else. I hope she found something to do and didn't sit there worrying and trying to figure things out.
Me and mum always used to laugh at silly little things and it's so nice when we have odd moments like that now as they don't happen nowhere near as often.
