1. Expert Q&A: Protecting a person with dementia from financial abuse - Weds 26 June, 3:30-4:30 pm

    Financial abuse can have serious consequences for a person with dementia. Find out how to protect a person with dementia from financial abuse.

    Sam, our Knowledge Officer (Legal and Welfare Rights) is our expert on this topic. She will be here to answer your questions on Wednesday 26 June between 3:30 - 4:30 pm.

    You can either post questions >here< or email them to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll answer as many as we can on the day.

Where are all the men

Discussion in 'I have a partner with dementia' started by Del24, Jan 2, 2016.

  1. Del24

    Del24 Registered User

    Aug 17, 2014
    67
    Hertfordshire
    I had a bad morning this morning carer rang doorbell at 8am we were both asleep I was having a nightmare and it woke me up.
    I nearly fell out of bed didn't make it to the door in time.
    Telephone rang care agency wanted to know why they couldn't get in I reminded them our call time was between 9 and 9.45am
    They said she might not be able to come back.
    I got ready got my wife up at 9am at 10am nobody came .
    My wife was in the wheelchair in pyjamas so changed her top part then with the aid of a walker stood her up to change her trousers the only problem was she didn't want to do it no amount of pleading would change her mind.
    I had to lift her out of the chair without her helping so I was lifting 70kg and at the same time pulling up her trousers and then sitting her in the armchair.
    I hate to think what this does to my body.
    She can be very stubborn when she doesn't want to do what you ask.
     
  2. Lilac Blossom

    Lilac Blossom Registered User

    Oct 6, 2014
    500
    Scotland
    Hello Del24

    Sorry your morning did not go to plan. Unfortunately this is not all that unusual when the person we care for has care workers "helping". I care for OH (vascular dementia and several physical ailments resulting in poor mobility) .

    I'm not sure why you ask, where are all the men? What's the difference? We women are experiencing difficulties too. I know that earlier in life I would not have thought that at the age of 75 I would be in such a demanding 24/7 caring role trying to keep hubby at home for as long as possible.

    Best wishes Del :)
     
  3. fizzie

    fizzie Registered User

    Jul 20, 2011
    2,740
    Actually the care agency should be reported. CQC say that missed calls or calls not on time are unacceptable.

    Agencies get away with blue murder in the name of profit. I should phone them and tell them that under no circumstances should they do that again - the call was unacceptably early and now you are reporting a missed call. Tell them that if it happens again you will report them to the Care Quality Commission and to Adult Care Safeguarding because they are not keeping your wife safe.
     
  4. nae sporran

    nae sporran Volunteer Host

    Oct 29, 2014
    5,542
    Male
    Bristol
    I agree with fizzie. We ditched a so called care agency when they did that. The worker was actually getting into her car when I was reporting her disappearing act an hour earlier than scheduled, but she still did not return for another two hours.
    I doubt the CQC will actually respond to a complaint, they did nothing when I complained about that firm. It cannot hurt to report them anyway, just to mark their card before switching.

    Having had to help with personal care myself once or twice with OH a bit more co-operative than your wife Del24, though a wheelchair is going to be so much harder anyway, I can only offer sympathy for your plight.
     
  5. fizzie

    fizzie Registered User

    Jul 20, 2011
    2,740
    Yes i think the Agency will respond to the threat of a formal complaint though - as soon as a complaint is put in writing the CQC pick it uup at the next inspection. Threaten them and see if they get their act together
     
  6. piph

    piph Registered User

    Feb 4, 2013
    1,530
    Northamptonshire
    I reported missed calls to CQC just the other day (3 calls were missed due to inefficient admin at the care agency, leaving my Mum with no care calls at all for 36 hours just after Christmas). I received an email just 2 days later (below)

    Thank you for contacting the Care Quality Commission and I am very sorry to hear of your mothers experience of receiving no care or support while you were away. I will raise a safeguarding alert with the Adults safeguarding team.

    Information that you have given to us is very useful when we are planning our inspections.

    Once again thank you for contacting us.


    So it just goes to show that they do take notice, and I only used the Feedback form on their website, didn't actually make a formal complaint.
     
  7. nae sporran

    nae sporran Volunteer Host

    Oct 29, 2014
    5,542
    Male
    Bristol
    #7 nae sporran, Jan 2, 2016
    Last edited: Jan 2, 2016
    I stand corrected, they are taking a bit more interest than they did a couple of years ago.
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.